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Originally Posted by mart
His reply, "it don't matter none to me. I'm ambiphibious." My partner on the gun counter blew hot coffee out his nose. I guess that doesn't feel good from what he told me later.


Had an acquaintance that had a similar word. He'd say he was 'ambidubious' - ability to screw up equally well with either hand.


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Had one friend go into an electronics store years ago, asking the salesman for a look at some of the then-new VCRs.

He said he wanted to look at VCSs.

Salesman said, "You mean VCRs."

Without batting an eye, friend says, "Yea, them too."

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In high school a friend of mine and I walked up to an Ivy League booth at the college fair. Before I could introduce myself to the gentleman manning the booth (we'd set up an interview earlier that week) my friend asked him, "What does your GDP have to be to get in?"

The look on this recruiters face was priceless. Needless to say I was judged by the company I kept...

The best gun one is for me was trying to explain to my old boss (and fellow engineer) how a bullet can not go too fast and zip through a deer before expanding.

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Originally Posted by Bbear
Originally Posted by mart
His reply, "it don't matter none to me. I'm ambiphibious." My partner on the gun counter blew hot coffee out his nose. I guess that doesn't feel good from what he told me later.


Had an acquaintance that had a similar word. He'd say he was 'ambidubious' - ability to screw up equally well with either hand.


hunting buddy of mine was 'verbally' engaged with a bunch of trespass poachers somewhere in NC. Says to one of 'em, '...what are you, some kind of HOMO-sapien or something...'? ANS. '...NO, NOO, NOOooooo, I ain't one o' them...'


"...A man's rights rest in three boxes: the ballot box, the jury box and the cartridge box..." Frederick Douglass, 1867

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The store I work at is purportedly the fifth largest retail firearms seller in the U.S. I don't care but we the number of firearms we move in a week still boggles my mind. Many of our customers have never owned a firearm and are generally a pleasure to deal with. Many of our customers do have experience with firearms and scare me to death. And some of our customers are more knowledgeable than me and I learn so much from them. I have co-workers that are very knowledgeable and willing to share their knowledge in a kind, genteel way. And some arrogant co-workers who think they know everything and are incredibly patronizing and overbearing. I'm fortunate to have access to our own sactoller who is a fount of information. My experience is probably a microcosm of what all the members of this website observe on a daily basis.


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A gentleman brought his Savage 99 to the store on Tuesday looking for a recoil pad. The rifle was in excellent shape. He told me everything was original on the rifle and his research showed the rifle was made in 1911. Since the rifle was chambered in .308 Winchester I told him if everything was original then the earliest the rifle could have been made was in the 1950's. Either that or the rifle had been re-barreled. It seriously ticked him off and he left the store. He was already upset because I told him I was sure no one made a prefit pad for his rifle and he would have to get a slip on or a grind to fit.


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Originally Posted by Petro
In high school a friend of mine and I walked up to an Ivy League booth at the college fair. Before I could introduce myself to the gentleman manning the booth (we'd set up an interview earlier that week) my friend asked him, "What does your GDP have to be to get in?"

The look on this recruiters face was priceless. Needless to say I was judged by the company I kept...

The best gun one is for me was trying to explain to my old boss (and fellow engineer) how a bullet can not go too fast and zip through a deer before expanding.


Hey, that last is, or used to be, hotly debated.

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A guy came into the store last week looking to buy a 3" semi-auto. I showed a number of shotguns. Around 45 minutes later he had narrowed it down to a Vinci or an A300 Outlander. An hour later he still couldn't decide which one to buy. He kept calling people and asking for advice and then would shoulder each shotgun again. I was hungry, needed to take a piss really bad and we had shoppers stacking up and getting frustrated at having to wait for this snapperhead to make up his mind so someone could help them. I'm not admitting I'm a smartass but I finally said, " Benelli is currently offering free oil changes for a year on the Vinci." The guy said, " Oh that's cool, I'll take the Vinci." Now what do I do? Tell him it was a joke and hope he doesn't get mad and complain to mgmt, or just roll with it and hope he doesn't need an oil change and call Benelli? Decided to go with the flow and will keep my fingers crossed.


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Quote
He'd say he was 'ambidubious' - ability to screw up equally well with either hand.


I used to work with a man that screwed up a lot of words and just plain invented some. The best was one day, I sent him to a pay phone to do a "one call" to get underground utilities marked. He came back and said that it was done but in about 30 minutes he needed to call back and Vericate it. He had crossed up verify and authenticate. He also could not say oxygen in the normal manner. I would come out Ox-K-gen. Lots of others but those came to mind quickly. miles


Look out for number 1, don't step in number 2.
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cdb, keep 'em commin'. Some of the folks you deal with are a real hoot!

Thanks for posting,

Geno


The desert is a true treasure for him who seeks refuge from men and the evil of men.
In it is contentment
In it is death and all you seek
(Quoted from "The Bleeding of the Stone" Ibrahim Al-Koni)

member of the cabal of dysfunctional squirrels?
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The Nagant/Nugget story brought back a lot of memories from behind the gun counter of people with their own vocabularies.

Had a guy looking for some " Eye Mister" Powder......( IMR)

Had another looking for Hog-a-don Powder...........( Hodgdon)

Actually had a guy looking for a Moisin Nugent......( Not Ted)


Lots of people looking for "Winnies"....( Winchesters)


One guy interested only in Winnie Maggies......( Winchester Magnums)


One guy with a custom #1 Ruger chambered in-wait for it-.....300H&H Weatherby Magnum Improved....

Many shoppers looking for Nose-ler bullets ( Nosler)

Many looking for Vargay Powder---( Varget)


One guy insisted he needed .22 longs, so I hooked him up, and he came back furious that the Long Rifles he found were cheaper...


I could go on....


"...the left considers you vermin, and they'll kill you given the chance..." Bristoe
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Ignorance doesn't bother me, stupid does.


"Dear Lord, save me from Your followers"
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I also have to stifle a laugh when people say, "picaninny rail".


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I worked in a store where 2 young guys came in looking for .38 ammunition. I asked them if they were looking for .38 Specials, and one said, "Nope, they're too long, we already tried." I told them we didn't have any .38s, and they asked if they could try a few different cartridges to see if anything else "fit" in the chambers. I told them I didn't think that was a good idea, then they asked me if I'd like to see the gun, I said why not and one pulled out most rust covered revolver I've ever seen. I looked at it, told them I thought it was actually a .32, used a piece of steel wool to scrape enough rust off of the barrel to read it and sure enough, it was a .32. They got really pumped when they heard that, and asked if we had any .32 ammunition in stock. I told them we didn't and pointed out another store in town that probably did have what they were looking for. It would be a miracle if those 2 haven't blown that gun up since. I've always been curious how they determined that .38 Specials were too long in that .32...


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Originally Posted by Steelhead
Ignorance doesn't bother me, stupid does.

^^^This^^^


"Allways speak the truth and you will never have to remember what you said before..." Sam Houston
Texans, "We say Grace, We Say Mam, If You Don't Like it, We Don't Give a Damn!"

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One that bugs me is recticle when they mean reticle. Maybe they're proctologists.


Chronographs, bore scopes and pattern boards have broke a lot of hearts.
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I hear guys talking about Mossburger shotguns fairly often

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Had a former boss who was a real douche. We went on a group duck hunting trip. He isn't a hunter so he borrows a shotgun from me. First morning in the blind he managed to load the shells in the tube magazine backward (brass first). I had to completely disassemble the gun in the blind while ducks were circling and others were shooting to remedy the situation

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I used to work with a mechanic who would ask for parts to be "rectal fitted" instead of retro fitted. Beyond funny stuff when he'd ask the new guy to rectal fit something.


Screw you! I'm voting for Trump again!

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Some people have no business owning firearms.


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