Home Forums Hunting & Shooting Elk Hunting Travis And His First Elk

Spill your guts.

C'mon spill it deflave what makes it a 5-man possible hunt?

Mike

Ok, so long story as short as possible:

First off, shrap has the art of one day/weekend hunting down to a science. We went to the spot well before sunup and started glassing as soon as we could. Spotted elk and checked wind. Shrap dumped mini-'flave and I off and then he went back to town to get the breakfast he wouldn't let us have before heading out.

Mini and myself headed up to the top where the elk were spotted. I'd say it was 1K' up. Wind in our face and moving west toward the elk we were more than a little confident the whole time. We check location of the herd by cresting the ridge on occasion and getting within line of sight. Then we'd creep back toward the edge of the timber and continue our creeping.

Got within 200yds and low crawled up to a shooting position. Everything with headgear moved away but the cows were in a huge ball of couldn't shoot. Chambered a round and waited a bit as I figured there would be a loner some time soon and I'd smoke it. Opportunity was aaaaalmost there, but the last straggler had another cow moving behind her so I held off. No big deal, they dropped down into a draw with a bunch of timber but the opposite side was clear and I figured they'd reappear. Ranged it quick and it was 300yds to the other side. Well within range of my incredible deadliness.

As luck would have it, I didn't have to wait. There was a cow bedded on the other side. I'd have to thread the needle through a clearing in the timber but she was only 200yds out. The luck o 'flave rang again. As luck would further have it, I was able to stand and use a tree as a support. This elk hunting schit was gettin' easier by the second and I laughed as I thought about all the fugging morons in this world that think it's difficult. Further proving that God loves me, the cow stood up, and gave me a perfect broadside. I let the breath out, smiled and squeezed the trigger. "Click."

"Fugg..." as I rack the bolt and am rewarded with a jam. 'WTF?' I look in the chamber and sure as schit there is a round in there. 'Why will it not fire? Why will it not extract?' 'Fugg it... who cares...try it again.' I close the bolt and hold just behind the shoulder of the still there stupid ass cow. "Click."

I drop down to a knee and move back. 'WTF could be causing this?' I look around for a stick long enough to run down the barrel and then a thought enters my mind. 'It won't extract and it won't fire because it's a 22-250 case!' I angle the gun so I can see the headstamp in the sunlight and sure as Gruff is gay, I see "250 Win" light up in the chamber of my 7-08. "FUGGG!!!!"

I don't despair because I have a long history of luck outweighing my habitual habits of being a slob and procrastinator. I dump the mag and grab the Leatherman and start tapping against the stock. Mean time I am glancing at the opening where I saw the cow. She's gone, but since Christ still loves 'flave there are about 6 cows standing on the clearing I'd originally hoped they show up on. As I repeatedly whisper "C*nt, fugg, Wish I bought a Sako..." etc. I look back at the cows and as I do I hear "tink." I look in the snow and there is a 22-250 cartridge laying in the snow. "HAHAAHA! Fugg yeah!" I whisper.

Down and back to a ridge so I can take the shot. Just as I low crawl to the rocks I was going to shoot over, the last cow disappears into the timber. I know my luck never runs out, so I wait. Sure as schit... three more elk. All bulls.

So on that note, I dropped a few more expletives, and walked back to my son who was observing the whole time. He never looked so proud to know I'm probably not his real dad. Then, we got the fugg out of there.

The End.



Travis

I'm in tears reading this. LMAO!

I'm trying to figure out why he didn't make friends with one of those home owners and shoot one from their back porch. Either that or wait till evening when they come in to feed with the cows.