Remember when people told me I didn't have another little, tiny, infant, baby 'flave? Well here she is five months later.

She still schits her pants, has very little hair, and does not speak English, but she is still a pleasure to wave to as I walk in and out of the house.






Travis

Congratulations, my daughter is 4 mos and maybe just a smidge cuter:)

Sis paid a visit aye?

Well, she certainly acts like you.



But she kinda looks like shrap...

All three of you are now on ignore.




Travis

Wait... After reading RWE's comment again, I can see that was actually a compliment.

I un-ignore you.



Travis

The only surprising part of this is that she's white.

Travis

I think she has potential, with some guided care by the forum members.

You on the other hand i am not sure about.

Doing my part to even things out.



Travis

PS-We're still losing. Go lay a hot one in something.

Very cute, but you should probably put that back where ever you found it before the amber alert goes out across the Montana airwaves.

I put you on 50% ignore.



Travis

Just the polish haff of me I hope.

Hope she can kill deer......hate the thought of you not having any.

Mail order Canadian Papoose?

Good pics flave... She hittin coffee cans at 300 yet?

She is perfect!

No. But the older children are.

Also, this new little tiny infant baby does not cry, and I'm not kidding. She wakes up and smiles all day. It may be due to her being part Polish so she probably has no fugging clue what good and bad even is.

But either way, she's a good little 'flave.



Travis

If I knew my daddy was Shrapnel, I would smile too.

Thank you sir.

The apples do not fall far.




Travis

Those things are chick magnets.

Cute, but do you know who the momma is?

BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

I just laughed out loud at that one.

Her head looks distorted. Or maybe it's my worldview.

Seriously though, one cute baby. Proves what I said back in April, AIN'T YOURS!

Haters always gonna hate.

Glad she kept those blue eyes too. If the Nazis ever come back she'll be A-ok.



Travis

Good looking girl

I hope she has all the happiness life can offer

she has a good start whit her dad

T

Good looking kid. What did she cost?

Thank you sir.



Travis

Not relevant. I'm rich.



Travis

Really really want to throw down some snide remark, but just cant...

That's one cute baby....

Thank you sir.



Travis

Thank GAWD she looks like her mother!!

Love ya, Man!

Thank you sir.

And GFY.



Travis

Still not believin'�.

Careful, he gets bitchy if you don't fall for his tricks...

You are welcome to visit any time. You will believe.



Travis

Damn. I was just hoping you'd put me on ignore�.

Very cute baby Travis...

Never.



Travis

Never?


I'll give up trying then�...

If you're going to borrow a baby for pictures for another BS thread on the Campfire, you might as well borrow a cute one.

She is definitely that.

I can tell you, if my wife ever saw her, I wouldn't get much sleep that night.

Not by the time she hits college. We will be scooping up cheap rifles left and right:)

In all seriousness though I hope she turns out to be a great hunter and enjoys all life has to offer.

She is growing like a weed. Pretty little girl!

She does have your hair...

Very cute.

Cute baby!

Same here.

Is the babymama the one you married April 1st couple years back?

Cutie, but I hate to tell you they multiply.

Very cute kid, Travis. Hard to tell if that's a girl, though. And you might not know the differences.

By the way, when will you post pictures of the basket you found her in?

No. But the older children are.

Also, this new little tiny infant baby does not cry, and I'm not kidding. She wakes up and smiles all day. It may be due to her being part Polish so she probably has no fugging clue what good and bad even is.

But either way, she's a good little 'flave.

Enjoy that $hit while it lasts! My youngest was the same way never cried,,, then on Christmas eve he learned to cry and didn't flippin stop till about 9 months ago.

What just happened? darmit that's strange.

note to self slow down on the moonshine hydro shooters.

She's most assuredly a cutie pie, Probably got that from Mom.

Congrats! She's a stunner! You're going to have your hands full when she gets older!

Eric

...and another here.

However no qualms about quoting the best of the bunch so far...

She a little doll so there's no way she could be yours.

cute kid! must take after mom!

enjoy every minute of her existence..... and she didn't do bad in the dad lottery either....but don't tell anyone on the campfire.. it would ruin your "manly" reputation....

I do see she goes to the same barber as Schtick does....

Congratulations, she's absolutely beautiful. You sir, are truly blessed.

Thank you all for the kind words.

My main motivation for posting these pics were to make the naysayers feel like schit.

That, and I'm a proud dad of course. But mostly to make people feel schitty.


Travis

Puttin' my man card at risk, but I just gotta' say it.
That first pic is precious. More so than diamonds or gold.

She gets that a lot. My wife (we married April of 2013) just laughs when people say "He's sooo cute."


Travis

I know. She looks a something out of a Pixar film.



Travis

On the first?

Is it April Fools Day already??

Where the fuggk has the time gone???

Very cute kid Travis. All the best to you !

Will not post her pic in the NBTE.

Until she is out of college.

Will teach her how to hover for a small fee though.

Best wishes upon her.

BD

The Pepper says thank you to all:




Travis

They're talking about you after a few beers.

Good Lookin' daughter tho'

BMT

Man oh man are you in trouble I can see you wrapped around that little finger already

Beautiful little girl! You can bet that Daddy is only the first male she will have wrapped around her little finger.

Ed

This child has no control over me. But she is quite adorable.

Thank you for the kind words and GFY.



Travis

Certainly is a possibility...



Travis

Whatcha got for the uhh err non-believers?[not that I am one]

I leave that to God.



Travis

Do you arrange the meeting?

In denial, I see.

Keep drinking the Kool Ade. It won't help, but you'll spend a lot of time in the bathroom looking down at your pecker and asking yourself "What was I thinking?"

Oh, and GFY.

Ed

No. I simply find peace in the fact that non-believers go straight to fuggin' hell.




Travis

So one should be a believer?

I can't imagine anyone looking at those pictures and not cracking a big smile! What a sweetie!

How did you kidnap her?

Once they discover their father is a sociopath, they'll realize their female sorcery doesn't work in my home.



Travis

The child was not abducted.

I kidnapped the mother from Poland. Then the mother had the child.

Thank you for asking.



Travis

Yes you stupid fugg! Do you want to go to hell?



Travis

Well that right there is just about the cutest little baby girl I have ever seen.

Thank you sir.



Travis

It's easy for me to get a charge out of babies and kids. With that said, this last picture is a real kick. Looks like a big personality in a small cute package. Enjoy.

I'm still in shock that the mother entrusted you with childcare

# Who dat babydaddy

WTF? I don't watch people that are this small.



Travis

You should take a look at straighttofuckinghell.com



Travis

She looks damn good after spending a week in my garage chasing the "Hell Cat". I couldn't figure out how to check out all the small nooks in the garage when the cat was in there. 'flave offered to bring her down for awhile, so we put her in the garage until she rousted out the cat that now lives in a dumpster.

Thanks for the loan...

Shouldn't it be "For Those WHO Believed"?

I mean stupidity is one thing, but doesn't justify non-personal pronouns.

That's just cold man.

Any time.

Thanks for the kid.

Wait....what?



Travis

You just found your way to ignore, buddy.



Travis

You and yer pretend ignore can GFY... or would it be GFI (itself)?

Thought I wasn't supposed to wanna go to he11?

Cute kid.

Hope mom is doing well.

Thank you sir.

She has me, so she's doing great (obviously).



Travis

She is an adorable little girl... cute as a button!

Flav - she's a cutie!!!

Yes she is!

Flave,

Tell the Mom we all think your niece is adorable!

See what I did there? Even if I'm wrong I could still be right!

Thank you sir.



Travis

Thank you.

I'll have you know I will be in Poland this December. You can meet me at the VFW in Blaine and I will show you this little tiny baby infant baby.



Travis

Now redundancy?

That's like saying "flave's kid looks like Shrapnel!".

Duh.

cute kid, please don't teach her to drink milk right from the carton, eh?

nominated for best post of the day! lol

December 28th?

VIKES vs. Bears outdoors

The little tiny baby infant baby would be a great cover for smuggling in schnapps in baby bottles. Just sayin...

The first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem, to keep denying that she has control over you will just delay the inevitable.

Well I generally can't tell one kid from the next, but that kid is UBER cute. Not sayin I'm a believer, though...cute kid none the less.

I can just see it now...

Deflave: "say Daddy"

Ubercute kid: "...GFY!"

Congrats, Travis.

Cute kid.
Who's is it?
Not that I'd believe anything you say but I have to ask.

Um, Blaine in December = SuperRink and hockey.

If you guys are hitting a VFW, let me know. I am ugly, but I can buy beer.

I expected twins this time

Nice souvenir, that. Better than a crappy beer mug.

You get a pass for ducking out of that invite, now that some measure of proof has been offered.

Gorgeous wee lass. Bravo.

Nice pics, but thank God she takes after her Mom...

Birth pics or it didn't happen. Need to see the head popping out.

You want the conception video?

Ho Li [bleep]!! Shrapnel has a sex tape?

That's some good schit, right there.

You ever seen his sparkler?
It's glorious.....

Well then how the fugg is she gonna drink it?

Are you from Poland by chance?



Travis

Are you going? I may get tickets.



Travis

Thank you sir.



Travis

Yes. I will notify you. Looks like the week of Christmas. I did not know Pollocks recognized the birth of Christ but I was told they do.



Travis

UBER Pollock!



Travis

Travis and his luck with Bears is legion, whatever you do, don't bet against the Bears, Travis hasn't seen one in 3 years of hunting them...

I did not see the birth. Actually, I have three children and I've never seen any of them born.

Also, this little infant tiny baby was brought into America via a Sea Section. I don't know why they call it that but it's some form of surgery instead of the traditional way.

Maybe a doctor could explain it better.


Travis

That's not entirely accurate. I have seen five. Only one of which was a legal bear.



Travis

Yellowstone doesn't count...

Women love it.



Travis

Schit.



Travis

Wasn't planning on it but could make arrangements if you don't mind me wearing my Cabela's Stand Hunter Extreme fluffy outfit.

This is me in said fluffy outfit:

Congrats Travis! She is a keeper for sure. You, mmmmm, not so much.

Don't be ridiculous. All 'flaves are wonderful.



Travis

I'll have a hard time keeping my hands off you...



Travis

You will have to sit on them. You won't be clapping anyway unless you become a Vikings fan.

You're smokin' bat schit.

This might be a good trip. I would like to meet all the Pollocks in one place if at all possible. We can get schitfaced and make fun of each other.



Travis

We should plan on it. I live way closer to ND than I do the Twin Chitholes but could make a mini-vaca out of it.

Beautiful Lass 'flave.

Get a new monitor.

She's pink.

Keep me posted on this Pollock gathering.

Minnesoduh plays Philly the 23rd I think.

We could get UBER plowed. I also might be able to get some primo seats for UBER free.



Travis

Thanks.

I spoke to her last night. She seems to have some form of understanding of English right now.

Won't be long before she transforms from liability, to asset.



Travis

I will. Week of Christmas.





Travis

Sweet! Here is the schedule. No Philly on the 23rd but we could still get UBER plowed and pretend like the NFL plays on Tuesday's. LOL

REGULAR

1 Sep 7 12:00PMCDT ) AT Rams
2 Sep 14 12:00PMCDT * Patriots
3 Sep 21 12:00PMCDT ) AT Saints
4 Sep 28 3:25PMCDT ) Falcons
5 Oct 2 7:25PMCDT * , AT Packers
6 Oct 12 12:00PMCDT ) Lions
7 Oct 19 12:00PMCDT ) AT Bills
8 Oct 26 12:00PMCDT ) AT Buccaneers
9 Nov 2 12:00PMCST ) Redskins
10 BYE
11 Nov 16 12:00PMCST ) AT Bears
12 Nov 23 12:00PMCST ) Packers
13 Nov 30 12:00PMCST ) Panthers
14 Dec 7 12:00PMCST * Jets
15 Dec 14 12:00PMCST ) AT Lions
16 Dec 21 12:00PMCST ) AT Dolphins
17 Dec 28 12:00PMCST ) Bears

Damn. I'd love to make that Bears game. But I'm pretty sure we'll be wheels-up that morning.




Travis

Bears are safe, you might want to rethink the cow decoy thing...

Bah! Just tell your boss that you will return on Tuesday because you had to run down to the Mayo for a quick liver transplant

That was an easy pack out.



Travis

Has nothing to do with that. I don't work.



Travis

Lucky!

Hey Pinocchio, say Hi to Gepetto for me.

You're a slippery one.

Any chance you sell Insurance?

Yes sir.

I will PM you my amazing rates if you'd like.



Travis

She asks "Please Kenneth, don't call my daddy a liar."





Travis

Seems like just yesterday,,,,,,,,,

Should we go Term or Life? You like Annuity's ?

A. I.'ing, has made great strides. Lol.

How can you look into the eyes of that sweet tiny infant little baby and say such mean things about her father?



Travis

Reminds me of Forest Gump. (Where did that perfect child come from?)

Well actually, its her mom we can't say mean things about.

Well look at it this way...

Her mom almost likes being around me some days and so does this baby.

So I can't be all bad.



Travis

Still not buying into it�..

That's easy.......She's damn cute,



Even easier, You are Capital U Ugly,

Embellisher....

I doubt your name is even "Travis".

Even easier, You are Capital U Ugly,

Embellisher....

I doubt your name is even "Travis".


That just is not in any way right! How dare you call Travis, if he is real, an EMBELLISHER?? Do you have no scruples at all??
Shame on you!

UBER ugly?

Uber Ugly sounds harsh,

although he does deserve it.

I mean, who's kidding who?

In a couple days he will forget the kid and start talking about COCK again, it's a little bit similar to that movie Groundhog Day

That is actually pretty easy to figure out.

Stolat
Stolat
And Nazdrowie
Zimne Piwo!

Congratulations, cute kid ya got there!

Didn't know they still made them that cute in MT.

Congrats, and you are officially under order to do all you can to keep that smile on her face.

And, no doubt, woe to any offensive young men in 15 years or so.

AS to your comment in the other post about being rich; You better be to manage the upkeep on one of those. I mean, she's going to be asking for pink camo mcswirlies in a few years!

as "they" say: "you done good young feller"

Geno

So cute, so feminine, such a glow.....give her 16 more years, you'll want to choke her!


But really, she's a doll, enjoy those pre-teen years, you'll want them back someday.

That is some Japanese-generated technology/special effects image of a caucasian infant...

Right there!

Kenneth,

Even though you are from Wisconsin, and even though you say mean and hurtful things to 'flave, Christ still forgives you and so do I.



Travis

Dear Pollock,

I'm having a get together with all Pollocks the week of Christmas. You are cordially invited despite your not believing me.



Travis

I didn't do well in Spanish. Help me out.



Travis

Thanks Geno.



Travis

I discussed this with her older sister and the older sister promised she wouldn't do that.




Travis

That's what I thought. She's like a cartoon.



Travis

That's easy, it isn't Mexican, it is Indian:

"He sole it, He stole it, Now give it back it's Nocho Cheeze"

Your wife must be a beautiful woman cause that's the only way "this" baby could be possible. powdr

Thank you, she is...

That is one cute little gal. She could easily replace the Gerber baby food image.

Wayne

Damn, there are some gullible people 'round here.

I bet he still lives in Illannoy.

From one father to another, interesting that I see your name in this thread, 97 times,

but Her name is never mentioned, not once.

Shame on you.

Packers Gonna kick some Cutler ass!!!!!!!!!!

That's what I thought. She's like a cartoon.



Travis [/quote]

"Flave, you're a funny guy.
You need to photoshop that into a caption on a baby pic and save it to present to her at her wedding. It'll be payback for all the times she embarrasses you!

Thanks shrap. I'm lost without you.



Travis

Prayers sent.

Actually, I did use her nickname.




And if you read rule #1 regarding children, you'll see why I don't use her name. And certainly not often.

Also, you know she is my child because Rick states explicitly that only the parent or legal guardian is allowed to post pictures of a child. And I am not one to break the rules.

Funny you say that. I told my wife (we married April of 2013) she should fabricate some sort of big ass jar of baby food that would sit in a way that would position the child's head at the center of where the label would be.

Travis

All her first year pictures are going into an album. I am going to make two copies and mail one to Kenneth for Christmas.



Travis

Thanks buddy.

Drying up here pretty quick like.



Travis

Mail my ass, bring it in Person,

We're only about 45 minutes apart.

Montana, okee dokeey........................

Regarding Shrapnel as a character witness,

I mean Seriously, that's the best you could do?

Kenneth,

I will be in Poland the week of Christmas if you would like to meet my dear sweet little infant tiny baby.




Travis

Let's just stick with what we KNOW:

Fact: child is beautiful! No doubts.

Fact: Remember April fools? Travis NOT pulling pranks! Plenty of doubt.


Color me skeptical....



Clyde

Congrats! Good looking kid Travis!

Be prepared to be packing a gun every day after she turns 12.

Virgil B.

Color me honest!




Travis

UBER magnum!



Travis

The ugly gene must be recessive on Travis' side????

Would you like to fix this typo?

Not a typo. He got married on April Fools day 2013. He had his UBER cute little tiny small dinky infant baby on April Fools day 2014.

Took him 3 months to consummate the marriage

Oh, right. What an amazing set of coincidences! I'm pretty sure all of Travis' major life events will occur on 4-1 from now on.

Saved for future reference!!!


Clyde

Oh I'm not sayin I'm not a believer. I'm just stating the timeline of events

If I were from Oregon, I'd assume all weddings and births happen on the same day as well.



Travis

Funny !
Some Polish I picked up over the years
100 years (we wish you)
100 years
Cheers
Cold Beer

Congrats and Enjoy,
While I go and change my 3 mo grandaughters diaper

Ahhh. I never knew they had an actual language. I thought they just made those sounds for fun.



Travis

That, cracked me up ! Thxs

To avoid misunderstandings, you'd better brush up on your Slavic-English.
So when she ask about the "grazkee" you're not left scratching your head and handing her a cold beer.