An 86-year-old man went to his doctor for his quarterly check-up...
The doctor asked him how he was feeling, and the
86-year-old said ,'Things are great and I've never felt better.'

I now have a 20 year-old bride who is pregnant with my child.
"So what do you think about that Doc?"


The doctor considered his question for a minute and
then began to tell a story.

"I have an older friend , much like you, who is an avid hunter
and never misses a season."

One day he was setting off to go hunting.

In a bit of a hurry , he accidentally picked up his walking cane instead of his gun."

"As he neared a lake , he came across a very large male beaver sitting at the water's edge.

He realized he'd left his gun at home and so he couldn't shoot the magnificent creature.

Out of habit he raised his cane , aimed it at the animal as if it were his favorite hunting rifle and went 'bang, bang'."
"Miraculously , two shots rang out and the beaver fell over dead.

"Now, what do you think of that?" asked the doctor.


The 86-year-old said ,
"Logic would strongly suggest that somebody else pumped a couple of rounds into that beaver."


The doctor replied , "My point exactly."

Heh!

92-year-old Scotsman comes into the pub and orders a round for the house. Everyone is caught completely off-guard by this act of largesse, but eagerly accepts. Someone asks what prompted the gesture. 92-year-old explains that it is to celebrate his marriage to a beautiful 20-something. Seven months later, the scene repeats itself. When asked the reasons, he this time explains that it's for his new-born son. When the skew in the timeline is pointed out, he replies, "Aye, not bad, is it? Two under par and me with a whippy shaft."

Good stuff gents.

I had a vasectomy done because I thought it prevented pregnancy. Turns out all it does is change the color of the baby!

Good one!!