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Joined: Aug 2004
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Campfire Kahuna
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Campfire Kahuna
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 69,599 |
you should have sex with your wife every time renew your driver license. That would be all some guys would ever get...
Molɔ̀ːn Labé Skýla!
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Joined: Dec 2002
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Campfire Outfitter
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Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Dec 2002
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Look, I've seen all sorts of arrangements, so I'm not going to judge.
However, when the SIL starts mouthing off about her husband's interest in porn, it took things to a whole new level. That was highly inappropriate.
Wife #1, Satan, used to pull tricks like that. Porn was never an issue. However, she'd wait until we were all gathered for a family event like Thanksgiving and then make some horrible accusation or dredge up some dreck from the deep past and try to make it the center of the event. Usually, this was due to her predilection for control and she used these events to punish me. My folks got wise to this really quick and started discounting her and the accusations. The truth of it is, growing up a good Methodist boy, I had been completely honest with my folks about just about everything, so nothing really surprised them. That's a good thing to remember, folks. Honesty IS the best policy. When she started making stuff up out of whole cloth, my family knew it was hooey.
This all escalated until she realized she wasn't getting any traction with my family, so she started trying it with others. Finally, she called the police one time and that sparked the end to the marriage. I won't go into details, but she was probably trying to get me killed.
1) This is the first shot across the bow of a really malignant situation. 2) Once this kind of crap starts flying, I see very little hope of this marriage being recovered. 3) If I were the BIL, I'd make an escape as soon as I could.
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Joined: Jan 2016
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Campfire Oracle
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Campfire Oracle
Joined: Jan 2016
Posts: 95,650 |
Bezos is going to pay billions to get him some.
Ecc 10:2 The heart of the wise inclines to the right, but that of a fool to the left.
A Nation which leaves God behind is soon left behind.
"The Lord never asked anyone to be a tax collector, lowyer, or Redskins fan".
I Dindo Nuffin
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Campfire Outfitter
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OP
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Linda is a perfectly healthy 55 year old women. Her and butch have three children, all adults now.
My wife and I are in a similar situation. Except my wife is physically and mentally disabled. Hard for a woman that is in physical pain, can't breath and is riding a roller coaster between depression and mania to get much into sex. Humping off a piece without her being into it does not interest me.
Butch lives in involuntary celibacy ( I don't know if he's getting any strange) I do not. In my case I have assumed the role of caregiver and even father with my wife. Of course my wife has put on 85 pounds since she got sick, all around her belly. Not very appealing to roll the fat up to get to it. Frankly, I love her and always will, but I don't desire her sexually anymore.
And yes, the why is important. Linda has no physical impairments and no mental one's I'm aware of. And she is not generally a bitch to Butch either. Outside this you would think they are a loving couple. I don't know, maybe that something people learn, to act a part.
Last edited by Armednfree; 01/22/19.
The older I become the more I am convinced that the voice of honor in a man's heart is the voice of GOD.
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Joined: Feb 2011
Posts: 1,841
Campfire Regular
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Campfire Regular
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My sister in law and her husband were over. They've been married 30 years. We are talking about that when she rears up and says, " I don't know if there will be any more! I caught him looking at porn on the computer. That's like cheating!"
So we go one talking for a few minutes and I said, " I don't mean to pry, but how long has it been since you and Butch had sex?" Butch spouts out "Nine years!" Then I said to Linda, " Linda, if that is true then it seems to me that you broke the marriage covenant nine years ago and he is just reacting to it."
She stormed off to the kitchen and my wife followed. I could hear some excited talk, then she said, " Butch, it's time to go." So butch gets up and shakes my hand to leave, Linda didn't even look at me.
Diana comes in a few minutes later a bit mad at me, " You didn't have to say that to her!" she says. I simply replied, " Just telling the truth sweetheart." you did the absolute right thing. I am a pastor. If that conversation had went down in a counseling session, I would have told her more or less the same thing. In fact, I have said that same thing from the pulpit in a sermon on marital fidelity. The Bible would even say that she has been in sin for the 9 years that she has refused sex with her husband.
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Joined: Aug 2004
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Campfire Kahuna
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Campfire Kahuna
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 69,599 |
Linda is a perfectly healthy 55 year old women. Her and butch have three children, all adults now.
My wife and I are in a similar situation. Except my wife is physically and mentally disabled. Hard for a woman that is in physical pain, can't breath and is riding a roller coaster between depression and mania to get much into sex. Humping off a piece without her being into it does not interest me. Borderline Personality Disorder.https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases...ty-disorder/symptoms-causes/syc-20370237CausesAs with other mental health disorders, the causes of borderline personality disorder aren't fully understood. In addition to environmental factors — such as a history of child abuse or neglect — borderline personality disorder may be linked to: * Genetics. Some studies of twins and families suggest that personality disorders may be inherited or strongly associated with other mental health disorders among family members.
Molɔ̀ːn Labé Skýla!
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Campfire Outfitter
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Campfire Outfitter
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A&F, have you noticed that whenever you bring situations like this to the campfire it turns out that you were right?
You are a good man and I have a lot of respect for you. Not that you need that.
Politics is War by Other Means
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Joined: Jul 2011
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Campfire Tracker
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Campfire Tracker
Joined: Jul 2011
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Okay, one question here, what of BIL is a one pump chump? Did he hold up his end to her or is it all about him? Just saying, it's a two way street.
Fight fire, save lives, laugh in the face of danger.
Stupid always finds a way.
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Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 10,277
Campfire Outfitter
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OP
Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 10,277 |
My sister in law and her husband were over. They've been married 30 years. We are talking about that when she rears up and says, " I don't know if there will be any more! I caught him looking at porn on the computer. That's like cheating!"
So we go one talking for a few minutes and I said, " I don't mean to pry, but how long has it been since you and Butch had sex?" Butch spouts out "Nine years!" Then I said to Linda, " Linda, if that is true then it seems to me that you broke the marriage covenant nine years ago and he is just reacting to it."
She stormed off to the kitchen and my wife followed. I could hear some excited talk, then she said, " Butch, it's time to go." So butch gets up and shakes my hand to leave, Linda didn't even look at me.
Diana comes in a few minutes later a bit mad at me, " You didn't have to say that to her!" she says. I simply replied, " Just telling the truth sweetheart." you did the absolute right thing. I am a pastor. If that conversation had went down in a counseling session, I would have told her more or less the same thing. In fact, I have said that same thing from the pulpit in a sermon on marital fidelity. The Bible would even say that she has been in sin for the 9 years that she has refused sex with her husband. So would you say that denial of sexual concourse without cause, especially to exert power, is as much a breaking of the marital covenant as adultery? Does the fact that she sets up conditions that tempt him to sin make her partly responsible for that sin? Is this breach of the covenant consistent with sexual immorality, to be cause for Biblical allowed divorce? By the way, I applaud you for bringing this scriptural truth to light in open sermons. Most pastors leap over or overly soften such things to avoid offending.
Last edited by Armednfree; 01/22/19.
The older I become the more I am convinced that the voice of honor in a man's heart is the voice of GOD.
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Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 10,277
Campfire Outfitter
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OP
Campfire Outfitter
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A&F, have you noticed that whenever you bring situations like this to the campfire it turns out that you were right?
You are a good man and I have a lot of respect for you. Not that you need that. Well, when you cut through the bullchit you often find the truth. My problem is I don't tend to be diplomatic and avoid irritation. I'm told two things: I'm too "Black and white" a thinker and I am overly blunt.
Last edited by Armednfree; 01/22/19.
The older I become the more I am convinced that the voice of honor in a man's heart is the voice of GOD.
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Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 10,277
Campfire Outfitter
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OP
Campfire Outfitter
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Okay, one question here, what of BIL is a one pump chump? Did he hold up his end to her or is it all about him? Just saying, it's a two way street. Well, Butch lost his job back then and it seems the time line's converge. Linda had to go to work, which she still does. Butch did find another job but not making the kind of money he did before. I'm thinking like an $8,000 year cut. But he works every day and overtime when it's available.
The older I become the more I am convinced that the voice of honor in a man's heart is the voice of GOD.
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Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
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Posts: 15,358 |
She dont respect him after reading this last post....imo
I work harder than a ugly stripper....
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Joined: Jun 2007
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Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Jun 2007
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Has anyone considered that she might have worms and Butch loves to fish?
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Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 10,277
Campfire Outfitter
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OP
Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 10,277 |
She dont respect him after reading this last post....imo If it's based on the hardship they faced when he was out of work and she had to start I'd say respect was not really there to begin with. In such dire times a woman is not to be a hindrance to a man, but his support. Since Butch lost his job for no other reason than the company went off shore there is nothing for her to be angry at. I mean he worked that job for 20 years and rose to a section manager, and then it's gone.
The older I become the more I am convinced that the voice of honor in a man's heart is the voice of GOD.
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Campfire Regular
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Campfire Regular
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"I know a girl who lives on the hill, she won't do it but her sister will...."
ZZ Top I got a girl she lives cross town She's the one that really gets down when she boogie She do the tube snake boogie Well now, boogie, little baby Boogie-woogie all night long I got a gal, she lives on the block She kinda funky with her pink and black socks, she likes to boogie She do the tube snake boogie Well now, boogie-woogie baby Boogie-woogie all night long I got a girl, she lives on the hill She won't do it but her sister will when she boogie She do the tube snake boogie Well now, boogie, little baby Boogie-woogie all night long Blow your top, blow your top, blow your top!
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Campfire 'Bwana
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Campfire 'Bwana
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 46,745 |
Has anyone considered that she might have worms and Butch loves to fish?
Ok, TFF!
Camp is where you make it.
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Joined: Nov 2017
Posts: 1,186
Campfire Regular
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Campfire Regular
Joined: Nov 2017
Posts: 1,186 |
Maybe it stinks, that's why he's not hitting it.
On the flip side to that, maybe someone should read her 1 Corinthians where it says not to deprive one another.
I'd get rid of her.
The lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part!
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Joined: Mar 2007
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Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 24,369 |
Odds are high she is getting satisfaction somewhere else, either alone or with someone.
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Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 16,076
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 16,076 |
A&F, have you noticed that whenever you bring situations like this to the campfire it turns out that you were right?
You are a good man and I have a lot of respect for you. Not that you need that. Well, when you cut through the bullchit you often find the truth. My problem is I don't tend to be diplomatic and avoid irritation. I'm told two things: I'm too "Black and white" a thinker and I am overly blunt. I admire those qualities. Many people do not it seems.
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Joined: Jan 2006
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Campfire Regular
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Campfire Regular
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There could be a physical reason - look up dry vagina - happens around that age. Sex becomes excruciating for the woman.
"Blessed is the man whose wife is his best friend - especially if she likes to HUNT!"
"Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind and strength, and love your neighbor as yourself. There is no commandment greater than these."
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