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A friend of mine is having trouble with his bride to be! #15179546 08/29/20
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geedubya Online Content OP
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Hopefully , I did not give him bad council!


[Linked Image from i38.photobucket.com]

ya!

GWB


Poem by Rudyard Kipling


"You must choose between me and your cigar."
-- BREACH OF PROMISE CASE, CIRCA 1885.


Open the old cigar-box, get me a Cuba stout,
For things are running crossways, and Maggie and I are out.

We quarrelled about Havanas -- we fought o'er a good cheroot,
And I knew she is exacting, and she says I am a brute.

Open the old cigar-box -- let me consider a space;
In the soft blue veil of the vapour musing on Maggie's face.

Maggie is pretty to look at -- Maggie's a loving lass,
But the prettiest cheeks must wrinkle, the truest of loves must pass.

There's peace in a Larranaga, there's calm in a Henry Clay;
But the best cigar in an hour is finished and thrown away --

Thrown away for another as perfect and ripe and brown --
But I could not throw away Maggie for fear o' the talk o' the town!

Maggie, my wife at fifty -- grey and dour and old --
With never another Maggie to purchase for love or gold!

And the light of Days that have Been the dark of the Days that Are,
And Love's torch stinking and stale, like the butt of a dead cigar --

The butt of a dead cigar you are bound to keep in your pocket --
With never a new one to light tho' it's charred and black to the socket!

Open the old cigar-box -- let me consider a while.
Here is a mild Manila -- there is a wifely smile.

Which is the better portion -- bondage bought with a ring,
Or a harem of dusky beauties, fifty tied in a string?

Counsellors cunning and silent -- comforters true and tried,
And never a one of the fifty to sneer at a rival bride?

Thought in the early morning, solace in time of woes,
Peace in the hush of the twilight, balm ere my eyelids close,

This will the fifty give me, asking nought in return,
With only a Suttee's passion -- to do their duty and burn.

This will the fifty give me. When they are spent and dead,
Five times other fifties shall be my servants instead.

The furrows of far-off Java, the isles of the Spanish Main,
When they hear my harem is empty will send me my brides again.

I will take no heed to their raiment, nor food for their mouths withal,
So long as the gulls are nesting, so long as the showers fall.

I will scent 'em with best vanilla, with tea will I temper their hides,
And the Moor and the Mormon shall envy who read of the tale of my brides.

For Maggie has written a letter to give me my choice between
The wee little whimpering Love and the great god Nick o' Teen.

And I have been servant of Love for barely a twelvemonth clear,
But I have been Priest of Cabanas a matter of seven year;

And the gloom of my bachelor days is flecked with the cheery light
Of stums that I burned to Friendship and Pleasure and Work and Fight.

And I turn my eyes to the future that Maggie and I must prove,
But the only light on the marshes is the Will-o'-the-Wisp of Love.

Will it see me safe through my journey or leave me bogged in the mire?
Since a puff of tobacco can cloud it, shall I follow the fitful fire?

Open the old cigar-box -- let me consider anew --
Old friends, and who is Maggie that I should abandon you?

A million surplus Maggies are willing to bear the yoke;
And a woman is only a woman, but a good Cigar is a Smoke.

Light me another Cuba -- I hold to my first-sworn vows.
If Maggie will have no rival, I'll have no Maggie for Spouse!
Rudyard Kipling


A Kill Artist. When I draw, I draw blood.
BP-B2

Re: A friend of mine is having trouble with his bride to be! [Re: geedubya] #15179554 08/29/20
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BigDave39355 Offline
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He’s better off for having you as a friend.


Dave

The man who complains about the way the ball bounces is likely to be the one who dropped it. Lou Holtz



Re: A friend of mine is having trouble with his bride to be! [Re: geedubya] #15179561 08/29/20
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EdM Offline
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Having my youngest son marrying a couple of months ago, I offered no advice. Just last night son number two advised that he is marrying next fall and I will offer no advise. All solid "kids" that I am sure will sort their way just as I did.


Conduct is the best proof of character.
Re: A friend of mine is having trouble with his bride to be! [Re: EdM] #15179569 08/29/20
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JSTUART Offline
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Originally Posted by EdM
Having my youngest son marrying a couple of months ago, I offered no advice. Just last night son number two advised that he is marrying next fall and I will offer no advise. All solid "kids" that I am sure will sort their way just as I did.



Well huh...I am intending to take the young fellow that has my daughter's eye aside and teach him all my bad habits, and make damned sure that he doesn't get run over by my lass.

I think I shall start with hunting and fishing then possibly move on to 4x4s and knives, as the lad needs all the help he can get.


Well look at that, my lass just walked in and said..."please. those aren't bad habits".


I believe my task is done and the young man owes me a very nice Christmas present.

Last edited by JSTUART; 08/29/20.

These are my opinions, feel free to disagree.
Re: A friend of mine is having trouble with his bride to be! [Re: geedubya] #15179576 08/29/20
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I bought a friend a fifth of Makers Mark Cask Strength for his wedding present, But I'm refusing to give it to him until he admits to getting married. I'm not sure if he thinks i'm an idiot and don't know, or that I know and he doesn't feel the need to tell me. Either way, his reward is being withheld, because i'm a dick.

IC-A

Re: A friend of mine is having trouble with his bride to be! [Re: geedubya] #15179586 08/29/20
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Dad never said a word. He was my best man and let me dig my own hole to crawl out of. Love you Dad!

Re: A friend of mine is having trouble with his bride to be! [Re: geedubya] #15179739 08/29/20
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hookeye Offline
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My aunt hated my wife.
Mom not thrilled but then she never said chit about anything anyway.
My dad didn't care.


Looking back I should have listened to my aunt.

But she also wanted to send me across the pond to marry a "good Greek girl".

I saw too many old Greek men beaten down and shell shocked by their wives.
No thanks.

Re: A friend of mine is having trouble with his bride to be! [Re: hookeye] #15179803 08/29/20
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Originally Posted by hookeye
My aunt hated my wife.
Mom not thrilled but then she never said chit about anything anyway.
My dad didn't care.


Looking back I should have listened to my aunt.

But she also wanted to send me across the pond to marry a "good Greek girl".

I saw too many old Greek men beaten down and shell shocked by their wives.
No thanks.











Dear lord, a few threads later, I'm starting to get a picture of your Greek heritage.

Re: A friend of mine is having trouble with his bride to be! [Re: geedubya] #15179857 08/30/20
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JeffyD Offline
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Dad did not like my first wife. He and I had always been very close, but for a month before the wedding he treated me like a stranger. I confronted him about it, and he looked at me and said, "I don't give it a year," turned and walked away. He was right about the ultimate fate of the marriage, but off by 16 years.


"No good deed shall go unpunished!"
Re: A friend of mine is having trouble with his bride to be! [Re: geedubya] #15179864 08/30/20
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superlight17b Offline
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My advice to any man comtemplating marriage is: run,run like a thief in the night!

IC-B

Re: A friend of mine is having trouble with his bride to be! [Re: superlight17b] #15179866 08/30/20
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JSTUART Offline
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Originally Posted by superlight17b
My advice to any man comtemplating marriage is: run,run like a thief in the night!



Why, I actually like my wife and frankly cannot imagine life without her.

35 years in a couple of months.


These are my opinions, feel free to disagree.
Re: A friend of mine is having trouble with his bride to be! [Re: JSTUART] #15179941 08/30/20
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rockinbbar Offline
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Originally Posted by JSTUART
Originally Posted by superlight17b
My advice to any man comtemplating marriage is: run,run like a thief in the night!



Why, I actually like my wife and frankly cannot imagine life without her.

35 years in a couple of months.



Wives.

Nothing better than a good one, and nothing worse than a bad one. wink


~Molɔ̀ːn Labé Skýla~
~Liberal Stupidity Has Now Exceeded Their Ignorance~
Re: A friend of mine is having trouble with his bride to be! [Re: rockinbbar] #15179943 08/30/20
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JSTUART Offline
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Originally Posted by rockinbbar



Wives.

Nothing better than a good one, and nothing worse than a bad one. wink



Amen on that.


These are my opinions, feel free to disagree.
Re: A friend of mine is having trouble with his bride to be! [Re: JSTUART] #15179986 08/30/20
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blindshooter Offline
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Originally Posted by JSTUART
Originally Posted by rockinbbar



Wives.

Nothing better than a good one, and nothing worse than a bad one. wink



Amen on that.

Truth^^^^^^^

I've been treated to both worlds. Evil #2 nearly took me out. 1st one was a great lady, Bought me a gun every Christmas and would talk to my friends to find out what to buy, the SOB's would never tell me what she was scheming on. She died after 15 years. Then the evil one. Won't even go into the [bleep] she put me through. On the 3rd one now, 7 years, she is great. She's only bought me 2 guns but very nice ones and she has her own pile of firearms.
I know, glutton for punishment but I'm one that don't do well on my own so I went back to the lottery and glad I did. My parents loved the first one not so much #2, wish they'd been a little more vocal about their reservations. They were gone when I stumbled onto the current wife.

Re: A friend of mine is having trouble with his bride to be! [Re: geedubya] #15180014 08/30/20
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TrueGrit Offline
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We've only been married for 34 years and must of set a good example for the kids, because none of them have been married yet. I've made a lot bad choices in my 62 years but getting married wasn't one of them.

Last edited by TrueGrit; 08/30/20.

Life is good live it while you can.
Re: A friend of mine is having trouble with his bride to be! [Re: rockinbbar] #15180118 08/30/20
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Originally Posted by rockinbbar
Wives.

Nothing better than a good one, and nothing worse than a bad one. wink


That's the Absolute Truth!!

I've seen bad wives, it's horrific!


Paul

"I'd rather see a sermon than hear a sermon".... D.A.D.

"Because I'm President and they're not".... DJT

Joe and the Ho 2020!

molɔ̀ːn labé skýla

Re: A friend of mine is having trouble with his bride to be! [Re: geedubya] #15180133 08/30/20
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"A virtuous woman, who can find'?

I did , Praise the Lord!


These premises insured by a Sheltie in Training ,--- and Cooey.o
"May the Good Lord take a likin' to you"
Re: A friend of mine is having trouble with his bride to be! [Re: rockinbbar] #15180503 08/30/20
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Dutch Offline
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Originally Posted by rockinbbar



Wives.

Nothing better than a good one, and nothing worse than a bad one. wink


I had both in one, separated by menopause....


Dutchboy Kennels, Drents Partridge Dogs
Re: A friend of mine is having trouble with his bride to be! [Re: geedubya] #15180586 08/30/20
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There is nothing that can make you feel more exuberant, fearless, wanted, needed and special than a woman!!! There is nothing that can make you feel so worthless, useless, lazy, stupid, helpless, hopeless or ever do anything right.....than a woman!!!!

Married 3 times, first at 26, she cheated on me after 2.5yrs, with her boss' son, second at 29 for 8.5yrs. Great person and very generous while dating. Within months of being married I have told people it was like spaying an older dog, she just got meaner and bigger continuously after marriage. Suicidal, foul mouthed and just rotten. 3rd a sweetheart and the love of my life dispite my health going south during the 2.5yrs of dating but married me anyway. Married 6 yrs and after 2.5yrs had to quit work due to mitral valve replacement not working out and severe spine issues due to auto immune disease. Became withdrawn some not wanting to hunt or shoot the last yr or so. Packed up and left 3wks before our 6th anniversary. Here she ended up breaking up a couple that had been married 30yrs. Never knew her to lie or anything prior but became the most evil rotten two faced foul mouth liar ever! That will be 17yrs ago this fall. Lonely as hell but no surprises or pit bulls to put up with and don't have to worry about finding your spouse humping the mailman or whomever. Only continuous really bad thing I have done over those same 39yrs has been to have my bad hobby/addiction of firearms. However I will never say I am close to perfect but am dependable.

Last edited by SDWhirlwind; 08/30/20.
Re: A friend of mine is having trouble with his bride to be! [Re: geedubya] #15180615 08/30/20
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jaguartx Online Content
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Well, you're expected to be perfect or you will kill their love for you. Yep. Your fault.

Now when GOD said love is never ending, well that was HIS only lie.

Yep, GW, some have been known to give trouble either before or after marriage, especially if you arent that perfect knight in shining armor that is able to spend your life reading minds and making them perfecly happy as God produced you to do. After all, thats what some think He made you for.

You are, in fact supposed to serve and submit to two masters.

Last edited by jaguartx; 08/30/20.

Ecc 10:2
The heart of the wise inclines to the right, but that of a fool to the left.

DONT BE GETTING ANY CORONA ON YA

"The Lord never asked anyone to be a tax collector, lowyer, or Redskins fan".

I Dindo Nuffin
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