24hourcampfire.com
24hourcampfire.com
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Hop To
Page 2 of 4 1 2 3 4
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 25,682
I
Campfire Ranger
Online Happy
Campfire Ranger
I
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 25,682
Local urban legend has it that circa 1990 or so, a local man lost his wife. Coroner got done, but instead of calling the funeral home to come get her, the old man took her up into the Owyhee Mountains and took care of it himself.

The authorities could not find evidence of an obvious crime, and decided the issue did not deserve further pursuit.

A few years later, the old man died. And the kids tossed him in the back of a station wagon, and laid him down beside his wife.

Can not vouch for the veracity, but it has been a popular legend locally going on thirty years.

Most folks do not feel like price comparison shopping during the grieving process. So I would recommend, If you care for your heirs, or the chosen executor of your estate, get it done now.

When my Mother in Law passed last December, we called around the local well known and respected Mortuaries looking for the price of straight cremation, no service, no casket, no embalming. Just slide the remains into the furnace and put the ashes in a box.

Every place we called wanted $3500 to $4000. Then my wife's brother in law mentioned a local crematorium on the back side of Nampa Id. No Advertising, no fancy ornamentation, no chapel or stage. Just simply a very clean, well run business operated by caring and sympathetic folks. Total price out the door was $850 including three death certificates and transportation of the remains from the hospital to their facility. I think their limit was like 100 miles for that.

I am sorry. I guess I will never be a wealthy businessman. Because past history proves, if I were in the shoes of any of those first mortuaries, I would tell prospective clients "If that is what you want, I can not do it for less than a grand, but here is the phone number of a guy who can."

I have been known to walk away from several dirt cheap purchases. "Yes ma'am, I would love to have it. But it is worth far more than your asking price. I can not afford to pay what it is worth."

Closeout prices at Walmart do not count. LOL

Maybe that makes me to be the fool. But at least this fool can look himself in the face when it comes time to shave in the morning.


People who choose to brew up their own storms bitch loudest about the rain.
BP-B2

Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 69,069
Campfire Kahuna
Offline
Campfire Kahuna
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 69,069
I can't remember the title but years ago I read a satire on the American way of death. The one thing I remember about it was when at a funeral, the mortician had the body propped up in a lawn chair smiling at the mourners.


“In a time of deceit telling the truth is a revolutionary act.”
― George Orwell

It's not over when you lose. It's over when you quit.
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 66,401
Campfire Kahuna
Online Content
Campfire Kahuna
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 66,401
Ive been in ‘that room’ several times.

I used to have a pesto control account that was a funeral home.

Big porcelain trough table about 3” deep to contain all the ‘goo and liquids’

The nastiest thing was a little rubber block that propped up the head for cosmetic work, it had the hair and body grime of a thousand souls embedded into the rubber.

One of these things in there to suck out all the juices and pump you back full of polysorbate80.

[Linked Image from i.postimg.cc][/url]

Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 13,919
J
Campfire Outfitter
Offline
Campfire Outfitter
J
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 13,919

Many funeral homes are owned by big corporations that own many funeral homes as well as cemeteries nowadays.

Friends of our oldest daughter back in high school dad was a mortician and owned his own funeral home, the families residence was on the second floor of the funeral home. Daughter spent the night at sleepovers there a few times. She said watching their kids was a real trip as they just walked around all through the mortuary like it was nothing. Daughter said they'd get all excited when they saw a new cadaver or two being prepared for a funeral service and start cheering and dancing around singing "yea, we can go shopping now!".

Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 66,401
Campfire Kahuna
Online Content
Campfire Kahuna
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 66,401
Place i worked at, had a big drain in the floor

Can’t imagine having to know what went down into that sewer


[Linked Image from i.postimg.cc]

IC B2

Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 5,658
A
Campfire Tracker
Online Content
Campfire Tracker
A
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 5,658
[Linked Image from dangerousminds.net]

Joined: Feb 2011
Posts: 26,389
G
Campfire Ranger
Offline
Campfire Ranger
G
Joined: Feb 2011
Posts: 26,389

Joined: Sep 2011
Posts: 44,465
Campfire 'Bwana
Offline
Campfire 'Bwana
Joined: Sep 2011
Posts: 44,465
Originally Posted by NVhntr
Originally Posted by TrueGrit
My son is supposed to dig a hole under my deer feeder in the backyard and throw me in it. The county coroner has to come out and verify that I'm dead and there's nothing suspicious about my death. The only catch is I need to be planted within 48 hours, hopefully I won't be bloated and stinking to bad.


I wish that option was available to me. They kind of frown on backyard burials in Henderson.



When you have a feeling it's getting time to go, there's a whole lot of desert around there. Pick a deep canyon and go for a walk. Put a note in the windshield saying you went the other way and hitched a ride to Searchlight.

It's what I might do around here. But I'll hitch a ride to Gerlach.


The desert is a true treasure for him who seeks refuge from men and the evil of men.
In it is contentment
In it is death and all you seek
(Quoted from "The Bleeding of the Stone" Ibrahim Al-Koni)

member of the cabal of dysfunctional squirrels?
Joined: Sep 2011
Posts: 44,465
Campfire 'Bwana
Offline
Campfire 'Bwana
Joined: Sep 2011
Posts: 44,465


The desert is a true treasure for him who seeks refuge from men and the evil of men.
In it is contentment
In it is death and all you seek
(Quoted from "The Bleeding of the Stone" Ibrahim Al-Koni)

member of the cabal of dysfunctional squirrels?
Joined: Jul 2015
Posts: 2,058
M
Campfire Regular
Online Content
Campfire Regular
M
Joined: Jul 2015
Posts: 2,058
Originally Posted by slumlord
Place i worked at, had a big drain in the floor

Can’t imagine having to know what went down into that sewer


[Linked Image from i.postimg.cc]


I actually worked for a few years for a funeral home doing after hours "pick ups" and occasionally helping out at funeral services. One of the guys at the volunteer fire company I was a member of at the time was head funeral director of a large local home and knew I had dealt with plenty of death in the Corps and as an urban EMT and asked me if I wanted a part time job. Pay was pretty darn good, $100 for a private residence pick up, $75 for one from a hospital, nursing home etc. Not bad for an hour or 2 of time. We used a windowless white minivan as our "first call" pickup vehicle. Only thing that sucked was had to be onsite within an hour of receiving the call and dressed in a full suit/tie etc. To this day almost 20 years later its the only 2 suits i own lol. Also could pull a couple hundred bucks ushering and driving the limo or flower car for a funeral service.

To answer the post quoted above, yes the blood etc pumped out during the embalming process was drained right into the sewer.

IC B3

Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 4,127
Campfire Tracker
Offline
Campfire Tracker
Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 4,127
4th Avenue Mortuary
~You stab em we slab em~
Afordable rates. Call now.
555 320 1234

Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 9,687
H
Campfire Outfitter
Online Content
Campfire Outfitter
H
Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 9,687
My daughter-in-law worked at a mortuary for several years. One memorable situation was when the fire in the crematory furnace got out of control and burned the building down. It seems the fat on a 400+ pound client can really get going, and is virtually impossible to put out. All the fire department could do was hose down the surrounding buildings, and let the mortuary burn to the ground!


Ignorance can be fixed. Stupid is forever!
Joined: Aug 2015
Posts: 13,206
NVhntr Offline OP
Campfire Outfitter
OP Offline
Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Aug 2015
Posts: 13,206
Originally Posted by 12344mag
Originally Posted by Rock Chuck
Quote
You have to buy a concrete vault if you want to bury him in this cemetery."
Many cemeteries require either a vault or a steel casket. It's because wood deteriorates and collapses, leaving a divot in the lawn that has to filled in later. It has nothing to do with preserving the body although some morticians might make use of the rule to sell a fancier box.

FWIW, everyone in my close family has opted for cremation.



A vault is required in our cemetery so that when digging we don't disturb the dead and move their bones around.

A real pain in the ass when your digging a grave and the one next to it cave and spews bones into the one you're digging.


OK, that makes sense.


Let's Go Brandon! FJB
Joined: Mar 2008
Posts: 15,625
O
Campfire Ranger
Offline
Campfire Ranger
O
Joined: Mar 2008
Posts: 15,625
Graduated number one in my class, 1973, San Francisco College of Mortuary Science. My dad was a mortician, a brilliant mink trapper, jazz trumpet player, and semipro baseball player.. My grandpa was a mortician and the most terrific grandpa you could imagine. He was an embalmer 20 years before antibiotics and a true germ freak. My brother-in-law is a funeral director.

I must say, this is a pretty entertaining if not terribly informative thread. ;-{>8

If anyone would like to read a book that is an accurate depiction of the field, I'd suggest "The Undertaking" by Thomas Lynch.

Trust me, I'll be the last guy to let you down.


https://postimg.cc/xXjW1cqx/81efa4c5

[Linked Image from i.postimg.cc]

Soli Deo Gloria

democrats ARE the plague.

Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 10,324
Campfire Outfitter
Offline
Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 10,324
I have always said the worst used car salesman is better than the best funeral service manager.


There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow man; true nobility is being superior to your former self. -Ernest Hemingway
The man who makes no mistakes does not usually make anything.-- Edward John Phelps
Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 6,124
S
Campfire Tracker
Offline
Campfire Tracker
S
Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 6,124
I worked in a town where there was attempted murder, thievery and fraud going on with the mortuary. First they were burning 2 bodies at a time and mixing ashes. This went on for quite a while. We thought they were just burning the fatties. People would drive by and see a bunch of black smoke coming up and call 911. This mortuary was attempting a takeover of another mortuary 100 miles away and tried to poison that director after blackmail failed. It was interesting times.


Fight fire, save lives, laugh in the face of danger.

Stupid always finds a way.
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 66,401
Campfire Kahuna
Online Content
Campfire Kahuna
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 66,401
Killer Beaz aka Truett S Beasley, singer, comedian, song writer, occasional Nashwellian. 😃

Doesnt say it in his Wiki page but I know it, he went to the John A Gupton School of Mortuary Science.

Hometown tidbits like all references to Wydeassnona Judd having her dogs’ vocal cords carved out cause she is a bitch

Joined: Sep 2011
Posts: 44,465
Campfire 'Bwana
Offline
Campfire 'Bwana
Joined: Sep 2011
Posts: 44,465
Originally Posted by smarquez
I worked in a town where there was attempted murder, thievery and fraud going on with the mortuary. First they were burning 2 bodies at a time and mixing ashes. This went on for quite a while. We thought they were just burning the fatties. People would drive by and see a bunch of black smoke coming up and call 911. This mortuary was attempting a takeover of another mortuary 100 miles away and tried to poison that director after blackmail failed. It was interesting times.


Pretty sure I read about that mess.


The desert is a true treasure for him who seeks refuge from men and the evil of men.
In it is contentment
In it is death and all you seek
(Quoted from "The Bleeding of the Stone" Ibrahim Al-Koni)

member of the cabal of dysfunctional squirrels?
Joined: Dec 2016
Posts: 3,722
R
Campfire Tracker
Offline
Campfire Tracker
R
Joined: Dec 2016
Posts: 3,722
Some time back a husband and wife mortuary
was closed down in ft worth and they'd been
stacking bodies up like cordwood in a corner
of their funeral home. They obviously had been
doing some switcheroo corpse and ashes
substitutions to end up with extra corpses.
Might have had a spare parts business on the
side

I can tell you from recent experience to get
twice as much life insurance as you expect to
take for your loved ones to bury you with.

Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 13,732
P
Campfire Outfitter
Online Content
Campfire Outfitter
P
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 13,732
About a month before she died, my girlfriend had her back covered in lard.

After that, she went downhill fast.

Page 2 of 4 1 2 3 4

Moderated by  RickBin 

Link Copied to Clipboard
YB23

Who's Online Now
296 members (1minute, 257_X_50, 10gaugemag, 280shooter, 204guy, 29aholic, 45 invisible), 2,145 guests, and 1,026 robots.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Forum Statistics
Forums81
Topics1,187,725
Posts18,400,614
Members73,822
Most Online11,491
Jul 7th, 2023


 







Fish & Game Departments | Solunar Tables | Mission Statement | Privacy Policy | Contact Us | DMCA
Hunting | Fishing | Camping | Backpacking | Reloading | Campfire Forums | Gear Shop
Copyright © 2000-2024 24hourcampfire.com, Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5
(Release build 20201027)
Responsive Width:

PHP: 7.3.33 Page Time: 0.107s Queries: 15 (0.003s) Memory: 0.9035 MB (Peak: 1.0604 MB) Data Comp: Zlib Server Time: 2024-03-29 05:21:04 UTC
Valid HTML 5 and Valid CSS