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Gerry is no longer a threat #15343709 10/25/20
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DigitalDan Offline OP
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https://www.cnn.com/2020/10/24/us/aggressive-turkey-relocated-trnd/index.html

Quote
(CNN)A neighborhood in Oakland, California, can rest easy now that a turkey nicknamed "Gerald" was safely relocated to nearby hills.
Estimated to be around 20 pounds, Gerald had been causing problems in the Grand Lake neighborhood for months, attacking dozens of people and ultimately leading to the closure of nearby Morcom Rose Garden, an 8-acre municipal garden that was his favorite stomping grounds.


Only in California.....


I am..........disturbed.

Concerning the difference between man and the jackass: some observers hold that there isn't any. But this wrongs the jackass. -Twain


BP-B2

Re: Gerry is no longer a threat [Re: DigitalDan] #15343713 10/25/20
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old70 Offline
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Also happened in Ann Arbor MI, about 6 years ago. A young Tom was pestering folks near a dorm on the Michigan campus. He was actually fairly benign, but that was at the start of the snowflake era.

Old70

Re: Gerry is no longer a threat [Re: DigitalDan] #15343743 10/25/20
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gunner500 Offline
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Yep, Gerry/Gerald would have been shot and consumed here on the way to attacking his first 'victim' grin


MOLON-LABE you commie vaginas!

If this Presidential election is stolen, Pull Up, Get Out Of Debt, Circle Your Wagons, DONT FEED THE MACHINE!
Re: Gerry is no longer a threat [Re: DigitalDan] #15343778 10/25/20
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My farmer great-aunt got two Toms when I was about 11.
Her only turkeys, once they matured they were mean bastards, trying to
intimidate everything. I wasn't very big, they were darn near as tall as me,
and just lived to chase me around. We spent a lot of time there helping her,
and I always got volunteered to gather eggs, feed hogs...and they were always waiting.

One day Dad and I were cutting wood near the house and stopped to get a drink and
to move some brush. And here they came! All puffed up,, strutting and drumming.
I started to back away, Dad said "Don't move!"
Pick up a stick and smack them, if they know you can beat their ass, they will
let you alone. I hadn't tried that before, figured my Aunt would beat my ass if I hit them.
I grabbed a locust snag about 3" in diameter and 4' long and swung at a head.

He went straight down, quivering and kicking.
Dad, said "Holy hell, you killed it. I didn't mean for you to hit it like that. Isabell is
gonna be pissed! The, seeing his buddy/competition down for the count, the other
One came over and started kicking the crap out of him. Spurring and pecking at it.
After a minute, the one I hit started to get up, staggering and falling back down.
His buddy grabbed his beak, and they wrapped their necks around each other like
two snakes, pushing and fighting.

I never had an issue with them again, don't know if they were afraid of me,
or I just wasn't afraid of them anymore.


About 20 years later, I was hunting spring turkeys there. Noon came and I had
a sandwich with my Aunt and was leaving. She still had turkeys, but different ones.
I got in my truck hooked low gear and rolled through the breaker in her circular driveway,
headed diwn the hill, and heard her yelling.

I grabbed reverse and started back to her. She started yelling louder.
I stopped, got out, and there layed her gobbler.
I had 33's on that truck, and he evidently saw them move and decided to attack one.
Thank God, she saw the whole thing. It came runni g from the side and tried to spur
the tire from the front!

She picked it up, tears in her eyes, and said "Take it home, your mom might be able to use it".
The heart was literally laying there on the ground, just the heart in a red puddle.

Of course mom gave me all kind of hell when we skinned it out.
Surprisingly it wasn't too messed up.

30 years later the cobbler I got with the Dodge will comes up.


I'm an American, we kneel to no man.
Only to God!

The Alabama section of Pennsylvania.
Where we cling to our God and Guns.
Re: Gerry is no longer a threat [Re: DigitalDan] #15343790 10/25/20
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johnw Offline
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When my daughter was in kindergarten she got chased by a big tom one morning getting on the bus. The driver stopped when dropping her off that afternoon and asked my wife to keep her in the house til he waved, for a couple of days.

And that's how it worked for a couple of days. Dutch, the driver would stand in the door of the bus and wave for the daughter to come out.
Second or maybe 3rd day, here comes old Tom again.
Dutch steps off the bus with a tennis racket. Tom desisted and never reappeared...


"Chances Will Be Taken"

If you could reason with a Democrat there wouldn't be any Democrats...
IC-A

Re: Gerry is no longer a threat [Re: DigitalDan] #15343794 10/25/20
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There was a video on Ridiculousness where a cop was called to deal with a mean wild turkey.

The turkey put the cop back in his patrol unit . It was funny to watch.


The degree of my privacy is no business of yours.

What we've learned from history is that we haven't learned from it.
Re: Gerry is no longer a threat [Re: DigitalDan] #15343833 10/25/20
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My wife got attacked by a hen when she got between a hen and her poults while watering the garden. She was spraying the hen with water, yelling and kicking while backing up and only got pecked a couple of times before her bull dog came to the rescue.


Life is good live it while you can.
Re: Gerry is no longer a threat [Re: DigitalDan] #15343841 10/25/20
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My grandmother had chickens and one rooster was my sister’s. It was a mean sumbitch and always going after people.

One day my grandmother was hobbling along with her cane and the rooster came after her, so she gave a swing with her cane and the rooster dropped. Grandma starts crying, in her heavy German accent “I keeled Maria’s cheeken, I keeled Maria’s cheeken.” A couple minutes later the rooster got up, shook his head and took off.

About a week later the bastage went after my 2 year old cousin and raked her leg pretty good. He lost his head after that. Grandma made soup.

Couple years ago took Slavyanka and kids to a local nursery for a Mother’s Day tea party. They had a big pond on the property with swans. One young girl in the group got too close to the pond and the male came ripping across to attack. Everbody (all women) suddenly ran behind me, so I figured “It’s you or me, sumbitch” and stood my ground. He stopped about 5 feet away.

Re: Gerry is no longer a threat [Re: DigitalDan] #15343882 10/25/20
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aalf Offline
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Re: Gerry is no longer a threat [Re: aalf] #15343900 10/25/20
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Originally Posted by aalf


Now I know..... 'Oh Schit' is universal . Didn't understand another word that was said.


An Old Turd! Deplorable! Unrepentant Murderer!

Just "Campfire Riffraff and Trash"!
IC-B

Re: Gerry is no longer a threat [Re: gunner500] #15343920 10/25/20
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Originally Posted by gunner500
Yep, Gerry/Gerald would have been shot and consumed here on the way to attacking his first 'victim' grin


But, but, hes bleck, and in his younger days, he had been treated like a chick.

Last edited by jaguartx; 10/25/20.

Ecc 10:2
The heart of the wise inclines to the right, but that of a fool to the left.

DONT BE GETTING ANY CORONA ON YA

"The Lord never asked anyone to be a tax collector, lowyer, or Redskins fan".

I Dindo Nuffin
Re: Gerry is no longer a threat [Re: DigitalDan] #15344207 10/25/20
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I think I have the solution for all the trouble makers in the cities. Just relocate them so they are somebody else’s problem. Or kill em. Your choice. Edk

Re: Gerry is no longer a threat [Re: Dillonbuck] #15344246 10/25/20
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Originally Posted by Dillonbuck
My farmer great-aunt got two Toms when I was about 11.
Her only turkeys, once they matured they were mean bastards, trying to
intimidate everything. I wasn't very big, they were darn near as tall as me,
and just lived to chase me around. We spent a lot of time there helping her,
and I always got volunteered to gather eggs, feed hogs...and they were always waiting.

One day Dad and I were cutting wood near the house and stopped to get a drink and
to move some brush. And here they came! All puffed up,, strutting and drumming.
I started to back away, Dad said "Don't move!"
Pick up a stick and smack them, if they know you can beat their ass, they will
let you alone. I hadn't tried that before, figured my Aunt would beat my ass if I hit them.
I grabbed a locust snag about 3" in diameter and 4' long and swung at a head.

He went straight down, quivering and kicking.
Dad, said "Holy hell, you killed it. I didn't mean for you to hit it like that. Isabell is
gonna be pissed! The, seeing his buddy/competition down for the count, the other
One came over and started kicking the crap out of him. Spurring and pecking at it.
After a minute, the one I hit started to get up, staggering and falling back down.
His buddy grabbed his beak, and they wrapped their necks around each other like
two snakes, pushing and fighting.

I never had an issue with them again, don't know if they were afraid of me,
or I just wasn't afraid of them anymore.


About 20 years later, I was hunting spring turkeys there. Noon came and I had
a sandwich with my Aunt and was leaving. She still had turkeys, but different ones.
I got in my truck hooked low gear and rolled through the breaker in her circular driveway,
headed diwn the hill, and heard her yelling.

I grabbed reverse and started back to her. She started yelling louder.
I stopped, got out, and there layed her gobbler.
I had 33's on that truck, and he evidently saw them move and decided to attack one.
Thank God, she saw the whole thing. It came runni g from the side and tried to spur
the tire from the front!

She picked it up, tears in her eyes, and said "Take it home, your mom might be able to use it".
The heart was literally laying there on the ground, just the heart in a red puddle.

Of course mom gave me all kind of hell when we skinned it out.
Surprisingly it wasn't too messed up.

30 years later the cobbler I got with the Dodge will comes up.


Good story, well told. (I bet that the elves were confused that night after he didn't show up at the shoe shop.) smile


Not a real member - just an ordinary guy who appreciates being able to hang around and say something once in awhile.

Happily Trapped In the Past (Thanks, Joe)

Not only a less than minimally educated person, but stupid and out of touch as well.
Re: Gerry is no longer a threat [Re: DigitalDan] #15344287 10/25/20
Joined: Oct 2011
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Originally Posted by DigitalDan
https://www.cnn.com/2020/10/24/us/aggressive-turkey-relocated-trnd/index.html

Quote
(CNN)A neighborhood in Oakland, California, can rest easy now that a turkey nicknamed "Gerald" was safely relocated to nearby hills.
Estimated to be around 20 pounds, Gerald had been causing problems in the Grand Lake neighborhood for months, attacking dozens of people and ultimately leading to the closure of nearby Morcom Rose Garden, an 8-acre municipal garden that was his favorite stomping grounds.


Only in California.....


Lol, fugging city slickin' pussies.


Paul

"I'd rather see a sermon than hear a sermon".... D.A.D.

"Because I'm President and they're not".... DJT

Joe and the Ho 2020!

molɔ̀ːn labé skýla

Re: Gerry is no longer a threat [Re: DigitalDan] #15344351 10/25/20
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Seafire Offline
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Got plenty of turkeys that gang up on about anything around here...

but I run at them, and they take off quickly....

they also seem to know my single shot HMR, and what it does... they really take off when I walk out side with that...

they chase deer and even the elk around the area... except the big herd bull, who goes after them...

turkeys are like democRATS... real brave and pushy, until someone makes them put some skin in the game...




"Minus the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the Country" Marion Barry, Mayor of Wash DC

“Owning guns is not a right. If it were a right, it would be in the Constitution.” ~Alexandria Ocasio Cortez

Re: Gerry is no longer a threat [Re: DigitalDan] #15344377 10/25/20
Joined: Aug 2013
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I had one in my front yard a couple of months ago, that took a massive dump. I didn't think much about it, until the dogs came in later with green turkey schit caked in their fur. That damned turkey won't survive the next time it comes around............


While it's true that all liberals are crazy people, not all crazy people are liberals.
Re: Gerry is no longer a threat [Re: DigitalDan] #15344407 10/25/20
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A friend of mine had one of those "old-time" gunshops with the wooden floor and everything, including a black cat named Adolph, and a big old tom turkey, who liked to wander in and out of the shop (door was always propped open when the weather was nice). Adolph and the old tom turkey got along well, and the old tom seemed to know he couldn't get away with trying to intimidate the customers, though he'd try to boss them around if they gave him an inch.
It was a fun place to shop for "interesting" guns, he didn't like the generic crap you could buy at Walmart, and he'd tell you to just go there if that's what you wanted.


You can roll a turd in peanuts, dip it in chocolate, and it still ain't no damn Baby Ruth.
Re: Gerry is no longer a threat [Re: 5sdad] #15344798 10/25/20
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Ok, you owed me one from the shaving lotion thread.
Well played!👍


I'm an American, we kneel to no man.
Only to God!

The Alabama section of Pennsylvania.
Where we cling to our God and Guns.
Re: Gerry is no longer a threat [Re: DigitalDan] #15344905 10/25/20
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In KY "Gerry" would have been delicious.

Re: Gerry is no longer a threat [Re: DigitalDan] #15344923 10/25/20
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I used to live in that part of Oakland and there has always been a surprising amount of wildlife there (not counting the current BLM/Antifa scum). After I moved back to Oakland post-law school/NYC living, I heard something making noise in the yard and went out with a flashlight and a gun, expecting to find a burglar. It was a very nice mulie buck munching on landscaping. It's a shame the real animals have taken over Oakland these days.


I I cut down trees, I wear high heels
Suspendies and a bra
I wish I'd been a girlie, just like my dear Papa
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