Home Forums Hunting & Shooting Hunter's Campfire "Please don't shoot the piano player".

On the Condom dispenser in a Minneapolis bar:

Tarp yer Load!!!

I reserve the right to encourage self gratification.

Up river on the Missouri in a lumber yard bathroom. "Please flush, Lexington needs the water."

In the restroom at Base Operations over the urinal.. "Pilots with short stacks and low manifold pressure please taxi closer".

Probably not one of today's young flyers would have any idea what that meant.

Flying the C7A Caribou in Vietnam, we would frequently have a reporter from the Stars and Stripes, young Army E-5 IIRC, hitch a ride with us and tour around the country looking for stories. At that time, outhouse poetry and commentary had risen to towering heights, there were some really great lines there inscribed by some brilliant authors. This reporter would go into the outhouses along the route while we were loading or refueling or whatever, he copied down everything he found. Said when he got back to the World he was going to write a book with that stuff. Have always wondered if he made it back ok.

Pity the man who's love of poetry is aroused by the smell of shiet.

Dyslexics UNTIE!

Please don't do cocaine in our FUGGING bathroom!

We aim to please.

You aim too please.

In a restaurant, Unrestrained children will be given chocolate and a puppy.


mike r

Those with short bats,
Please step closer to the plate.

This one in the bathroom stall of a BC cafe:

Here I sit
My ass hole hurtin
Cause I just $hit
Another Albertan.


I guess there’s a little bit of provincial rivalry, eh?

Over a urinal south of Peekskill, NY. "Pee fast boys, our crabs swim upstream"

Here I sit all broken hearted
Tried to schitt but only farted
A little while later I took a chance
Tried to fart and schitt my pants.

“In case of fire, leave building BEFORE tweeting about it.”

A lot of Indians on welfare in Alberta, Canada. Years ago he saw a sign in a bar
“Last thing Jesus told the Indians before he left was don’t do anything till I get back.”
Same sign applies to a lot of groups.

For your safety, please keep your arms and legs inside the outhouse at all times

Sit back and enjoy the ride

Place called the Road Kill cafe.
They had good ones all over the place can't remember a one..
But the bartender, she drew cleavage on top of my pint instead of a clover.

Seen on scrawled on a strip club bathroom wall, "I fucked your mother". Below it someone else wrote, "Go home dad, you're drunk."

Ici tombent en ruine....les merveilles de la cuisine.

Hamburgers $5; Liver and Onions $250

Here's another: "I started out with nothin--I still have most of it."