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BTDT. Twice. Dad was progressively worse with his dementia. I didn't want to take away his Sig 229. Told mom he doesn't have the strength to pull back the slide. Wrong. Still, he'd get pissed if it "disappeared". So I took out the firing pin. He had the piece of mind his sidearm was where it always was for 40 years. Had to put door alarms on all the egress doors as he'd wonder off in the middle of the night. Found him eating Jello powder one night and trying to eat detergent another time. It was rough.

Mom was bedridden but had hallucinations. She'd call at all hours of the night telling me there were monkeys on her bed and should she call the cops. No, I'll be over in a bit - another 20 minute drive at 3:30am.

I'm glad I helped them the best I could, but looking back, it was a rough time and nothing I could do would change their outcome.

Rog, do the best you can and that's good enough. Some things are beyond our control. Godspeed, sir.

I feel sorry for you and your dad. Bad time you have.

Wouldn't it be better to leave him a deactivated gun? Old people are very often quite leery when they have the feeling that someone has taken something away from them. This can be money, the jewels or even a gun. I don't know if your dad would be aware of if you leave him a 1911 without the firing pin. Keeping it under his pillow shows that he would feel more save with than without his gun.

Praying for you Roger. Praying for wisdom and strength. It’s not an easy road you’re on, hang in there.

This Feb I lost my dad to Parkinsons and it ended up with 4 months of dementia at the end. Constant keeping an eye on him as he could be up for days and crawled around like and infant and fought us changing diapers and taking care of him. He turned into an awful creature but really it wasn't him. At the time I was wondering how much of this could my mom and I take and thought I was at a wall. As exhausted as we were there was eventually an end to it and it actually came peacefully.

Looking back now I know exactly what you are going thru but every minute you spend with your parents is precious. I now fondly look back how I help feed my dad for a few years, make his meals, change diapers, and shower and clean him up. Before that I took him many places and drives and many adventures with an SxS atv I bought for him. All of these things, even the dark times are time we look back and are thankful. Be strong. It may be a difficult time but right now your needed and it's wonderful your there for your dad. Relief and grief will come but you'll never regret being as close to your dad till the end. No regrets. Great job.

Praying you and your family find the strength to see him through this.

Prayers for you all Rodger.

What R-50 said in spades.

We're just getting started with wife's mom. She has been slowly losing the dementia battle for the last year or so.

Caring for a family member with dementia is one of the most difficult things any of us will face in our lives. The heartbreak of watching the person you knew evaporate and replaced with a stranger on top of the constant care responsibilities is impossible to describe to anyone who has not gone through that hell.

Prayers sent. Keep the faith. Peace cannot come soon enough.

All well and good, until the FedEx guy gets pistol whipped ;-).

I know your burden. Prayers sent.

Prayers Rog.
It definitely is not easy, but grab those clear moments when you can!
And stories...just roll with them
Dad told some tall tales at times but how is that different from any sportsman?
Sit back and enjoy them as if you were your wide eyed 7 year old self...

Prayers for ya Roger!

Wife and I got a look at 'things to come' over the past month. Her mom has had 2 emergency heart surgeries with 1 more to go.
We had no idea that her stepfather is in very early stage of dementia, so wife had to be there all of the time at the hospital about 150 miles away. The man would get lost going to use the restroom down the hall in hospital.
So we have her mom at 78, my parents at 86,87 and her step at 83, going to get interesting.

Wish you the best in dealing with this!

Hang in there Roger, you’ll be rewarded in the end with peace of mind and knowing you did all you could when others couldn’t/wouldn’t. The wife has struggled with her folks for the last two years by herself as her only sibling passed several years ago. We feel your frustration and pray for you.

You got it...

Yep.

Roger;
Morning sir, sorry to read of this.

In my experience - which is dealing with my much loved Mother in Law for more than 6 years and my mother for roughly 5 years as dementia patients, renegade is spot on.

If you're inclined I'd be happy to share with you anything and all that we learned on that journey.

It's a recent one too for us Roger, we lost Mom in the spring of 2019 and Mom in Law last spring during the beer flu lock down where I wasn't allowed in to see her at the end - only one family member.

Anyways sir, you'll be in my thoughts and prayers for sure and again if you want to talk I'm here or on Faceplant - just give me a shout.

Dwayne

I usually don't have the patience to follow your posts closely, but this one is gold. Applies to so many more situations than the one in the OP. Thanks.

You got it Roger, I'm dealing with my 84 year old mothers dementia now......its trying times....

Understood, and done.

You got em from MN.