Home Forums Hunting & Shooting Hunter's Campfire 15 year old daughters bestie came to live with us

I'm not going to go into all of the details tonight, been a busy weekend and need to vent a little.

Our 15 year old daughters best friend has been at our house more than her own for the last 5 years. Her parents are raging alcoholics and really don't want her around. They are both without jobs and trying to get on disability. They adopted her when she was 8 years old,she is 15 now. They told her last weekend that they regret adopting her and want to put her back in the system. She has been depressed lately and recently asked her parents to get her into counseling because she was having suicidal thoughts. Her dad went and got his pistol and put it to her head and told her to pull the trigger.

Jump ahead to Saturday morning. Her mother called my wife and told her to come get the girl, that they were done with her. This young lady has been at our house more often than not the last 5 years and is like our own daughters and a sister to the girls. She goes on vacation with us,float trips, trout fishing, etc. She is part of the family.

My wife is going to start making phone calls tomorrow to find out what if anything that we can do to get power of attorney,get her parents to sign her over to us or whatever.

Spent the weekend getting a room in the basement cleaned up to start making it hers. Not to mention fighting the urge to go to town and rub her dad's face in the rocks.

This is just scratching the surface as to all that has happened the last couple months, so hopefully something good will come out of this.

Sorry about the long read and jumping around, run ons, etc
Any advice is appreciated, I'm sure some of the members have been her before.

Thanks guys

Good luck. Glad to see the young lady has people she can trust.


Clyde

Some time you have to do what you gotta do.
It sounds like you are already a sari-gate family to the girl.

I wish luck to you

Good luck to all involved. Don’t let the gal lose sight of her self worth.

Prayers up

Someone should stop that POS from robbing the world of perfectly good oxygen.

Hope everything works out well for you and the young lady!

No CPS in your AO to prosecute the parents? Sounds like they need some jail time, especially regarding that suicide story.

Good on your family. You seem to have a pretty good handle on it.

My parents raised foster children for years. It’s heartbreaking what most of them go through.

Taking on a child that has been severely damaged over years of not feeling wanted by her birth parents and then emotionally abused and abandoned a second time by her severe substance abuse adoptive parents is a recipe for a very manipulative messed up individual.

None of that is her fault but be prepared for a long tough road that may or may not lead where you hope and keep an eye on your own children that they aren’t lead down a bad road.

Obviously everyone is different and we all like a storybook but even likable kids raised like that have a sh1t ton of problems and issues to work through that usually take years or a lifetime to process.

You should go and kill him.

You need to file for legal and physical custody. Probably best to use an attorney. This is needed for school and medical. Also in case they change their minds and decide to take her back.

We’ve been there for a couple of our children’s friends through the years and I think in both cases we made a positive difference. They’re both productive and happy young adults that look at us like mom and dad.

I truly admire what you’re doing and I admire what an amazing example of loving and compassionate parents that you’ve shown your daughter. She’ll be 18 before you know it but until then these are extremely important years for teenagers. The stability and love that your family offers is invaluable for that young lady to begin to move ahead despite the pain of the past, wondering why nobody wants you.

She doesn’t have to feel unwanted anymore.

God bless you and your family!

Good on you and your family for taking the young lady in. Too often they are lost through the cracks. Teach her the full value of herself, love her like your own and hold her to the same expectations. Bet in the end your life will all the richer. Best wishes.

GreggH

Maybe contact the closest victim’s advocate and get a forensic interview. There might be more going on and you may get to see the POS “parents” held accountable.

GOD bless you and the post wasn't nearly too long.

PTL for people like you.

Please dear LORD, give them help. You are already moving in this mess.

Praise and Glory be to you FATHER.

AMEN.

Get yourselves into some sort of official capacity concerning making legal and medical decisions on her behalf as soon as possible. If she's actually having suicidal thoughts, the very last position you need to be in would be trying to get her emergency treatment with no way to authorize it legally. Teenagers in general, and girls in particular can be a hormonal mess even under ideal circumstances, and her situation sounds like it's far from ideal.

It's difficult to guess how a government entity will handle such a situation. But in this situation it may be that the officials can expedite some sort of temporary custody while a more formal arrangement is worked out.

Good for you trying to bring a sense of normalcy to this poor girls life! Ignore the stupid [bleep] advise about revenge on her adoptive parents. That’ll only make things worse for everyone- no matter how satisfying it may be. Be damned careful around her too. YOU don’t want any crazy accusations made against you for molestation, which the parents could bring against you if they want to screw you up. Be sure and get this dine thru the proper channels. Never be alone with this girl until things are settled, one way or another. Sorry to sound like this but My wife is a LCSW and works with these situations a lot. One must keep their guard up and protect you and your family first and foremost. Again, you and your wife are to be complimented! God bless!

You should get with a good family law attorney, to protect you and your assets as well as protecting the young lady. As is, you have no standing with regards to the young lady’s health care, school status, or anything else. I applaud your actions, sometimes you just have to do it, but for your sake and hers, get it done correctly.

Can’t add much to what’s already been said

Good for you and your wife

Prayers that the young lady can put it all behind her