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Long long did it take for the "train wreck" to end? Who had the shortest marriage?

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I got drunk and married a co-worker in Nevada in my youth. It was around 7 hours before we could have it anulled.

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12 yrs the first time, wifey was married 3 months her first time

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A decade. I guess I lose this contest.


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I knew a couple that came home from their honeymoon early fighting. They took three weeks to get it annulled. The first posting of 7 hours is going to be hard to beat.

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Fellow I went to school with, got married by the justice of the peace. After the ceremony, they got to arguing over where to go eat, so he drove back to the justice of the peace, and tore up the marriage certificate. Dont know if that one counts or not.


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My alcoholic, coke-head brother in law married his girlfriend of a month during a trip to Vegas. Divorced two weeks later.

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Had a colleague who married a guy she’d just met two weeks before. Still together after 15 years. But they’re both kinda quirky so I guess it works for them.

2nd marriage lasted 9 months, but it took me another 3.5 years to GTFO.

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Shortest so far is 27 years.
Clocks still running.


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My brother was divorced and living in LaGrange Georgia. His long lost girlfriend from college called him up, Jewish gal who had moved to Miami.
They had a 2 hour talk, and the next day Joni flew up to LaGrange with her 7 year old daughter and she married my brother that day, at the justice of the peace.

On day 6 of the marriage, Joni heard a commotion in the kitchen, my brother's 8 year old son was holding a butcher knife, and telling Joni's daughter. "Come near me again bitch and I will carve you up."

The newlywed grabbed her daughter and her suitcase, called a cab, and by sunset was back in Miami. She got the marriage annulled on day 7.

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Originally Posted by Dillonbuck
Shortest so far is 27 years.
Clocks still running.
Same here!

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Several years ago a wedding reception in our home town turned into a brawl between the two families...somebody went after somebody with a chainsaw. (At the risk of extending this thread for 38 more pages, I'll mention that I think it was a Stihl chainsaw. )I think the law was called on that one.

More recently one of my wife's cousin's kids got married...another epic wedding reception brawl between the two families. The bride and groom each ended up going home with their parents. Both families have a streak of congenital batshit crazy. Seems to me the kids are now happily married.



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Only one divorce in my family.... in 1948... when my uncle got divorced.


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Not the shortest but I'm very constant. All 3 of my marriages ended at the 5th year.

Last edited by MPat70; 10/02/22.

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Originally Posted by simonkenton7
My brother was divorced and living in LaGrange Georgia. His long lost girlfriend from college called him up, Jewish gal who had moved to Miami.
They had a 2 hour talk, and the next day Joni flew up to LaGrange with her 7 year old daughter and she married my brother that day, at the justice of the peace.

On day 6 of the marriage, Joni heard a commotion in the kitchen, my brother's 8 year old son was holding a butcher knife, and telling Joni's daughter. "Come near me again bitch and I will carve you up."

The newlywed grabbed her daughter and her suitcase, called a cab, and by sunset was back in Miami. She got the marriage annulled on day 7.
Your nephew sounds like he will need to have a cell reserved for him when he comes of age. Been my kid, he would have had a tough existence for a while. My own marriage is just coming to the end of the 53rd year, so I'm certainly not in the running. GD

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9 months. She was out sampling different weener. And the second one, two years. Also checking out other options.

Both had a history of abuse, but I comfort myself by thinking it was because I must have a boring weener. Lol

Years later I got remarried and we just celebrated ten years this week. I taught it some tricks to keep this one entertained.

Last edited by mjbgalt; 10/02/22.
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A little over two years the first time. Second time 52 years. It came to an end when she passed. Dunno if I want to try for a third time around.
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I believe that my brother had one that lasted about 2 weeks! memtb


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4 months for me, not the shortest, but short enough.

It took me that long to figure out that when you have 1 woman in your life you argue a lot. When you have several, you never argue lol

Never got married again :o)


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Originally Posted by 160user
I got drunk and married a co-worker in Nevada in my youth. It was around 7 hours before we could have it anulled.

Lucky Bastid, wish mine had been that quick.

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A woman's heart is the hardest rock the Almighty has put on this earth and I can find no sign on it.
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