Ran into an old friend today, seems he has some real problems. He is 84 and is in the throes of dementia or alzheimers. He was last married in 94 and she apparently does not care, his son either as we have tried to get some input from him. The old guy is a disabled Viet Nam vet on full disability. He still drives, has no place to live other than at friends houses. Can't remember many things, is lucid sometimes and not others to the point of not knowing where he is. Or even recognizing the truck he drove up in. Need to get him some help. I am not his guardian so what can we do to get him a place to stay and some help?
check with your local vfw
Maybe try the VA and see if they can recommend social services of some kind.
Texas got an Adult Protective Services?
Most counties in Pa. have an Area Agency on Aging. I'd look under county government and see if you have something similar in Texas. Maybe contact the VA? If you have a church/pastor they might have some guidance. Or the chaplain at the local hospital?
Just some suggestions, hope they help. Good luck!
Dale
Maybe try the VA and see if they can recommend social services of some kind.
This, VA should know what resources are available. I am sure there is some kind of Adult Protective Services in your state, they handle those type of cases here.
Going to the VA tomorrow.
VA is where i would look first.
He should be qualified for section 8 housing.
A neighbor of mine was way back.
Texas got an Adult Protective Services?
Yes, that's who I'd call.
The hard part is getting Jerry to see he needs to do this. I mean once your to this point you don't remember any problems. He does say "I don't remember" a lot.
The VA is the Last place I would take a friend.
I don't know that there's a perfect answer, but sometimes a good independent Baptist Church will pair someone up with an appropriate well trusted man in the church. It depends on a lot of things.
I've seen men like you describe in assisted living homes that do ok in spite of institutional food. I think a social worker who knows of options with state assistance might be a place to start after the listing of IFB churches.
He also needs nutritional direction. Consultation with the right naturalpathic nutritionist is worth its weight in gold. He might get his mind back with that and the grace of God.
Knowing what I do now, I would avoid the VA like a WW2 Concentration camp. It will likely shorten his life after a swift decline.
He may qualify for Medicaid, my wife was a specialist getting people on at the care center here. Vets have a leg up on the process and the poorer they are the easier it is, at least in NV.
PM me if you want to pick her brain.
I called the commander of the local VFW and she said let her talk to him. Don't know the exact direction that will take but she is a very nice woman and would think about Jerry first. The Church is another option. They can actually be a lot of help in these kind of situations.
I called the commander of the local VFW and she said let her talk to him. Don't know the exact direction that will take but she is a very nice woman and would think about Jerry first. The Church is another option. They can actually be a lot of help in these kind of situations.
I'll pray for him and for you as you seek direction for his good help.
Your a damn good guy Rickt300. Mb
For years I was an advocate for people like him. Now here is the part some might find odd. I did it as a criminal investigator through my agency. I was the agency's point of contact for adult mental health calls, to include dealing with the elderly, elder abuse cases, etc.
The mentally ill and the elderly don't get protected like they should as far as I am concerned. Most cops don't find the cases exciting. The cases are rarely exciting. They are paperwork intensive, and most of the time the person you are protecting may not even be aware of it, or may be schizophrenic and think you are "out to get them" instead of trying to protect them. 99% never will realize that you are acting as their advocate. It is a very frustrating role to take on. But if you don't take it on, who will. The elderly need protected. The mentally ill need protected.
Anyways... Off my soap box.
Contact your local law enforcement and see if they have a CRT program(Crisis Response Team). Normally it is centered around people in a mental health crisis suffering from disorders like schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, etc.
They can have your friend talk to a designated examiner and ask a few clarifying questions, to determine if he lacks insight into his own mental health. A determination will be made as to if your friend is "Gravely Disabled"
“Gravely disabled” means the patient is unable to provide for basic personal needs (food, clothing, shelter) or lacks insight into the need for treatment and unwillingness to comply with treatment that is likely to lead to an inability to provide for basic needs.
A Designated Examiner normally is used for temporary mental holds, but if your friend is couch surfing and semi coherent it may be time to find a home for him where he is safe that he can get some meds. Odds are once he gets some meds on board he might be good to go for an assisted living type of situation.
Hope this helps.
RickT300, you are a sterling man of fine character in trying to help your friend who is suffering from Alzheimer's Dementia. It is a terrible disorder. My wife died from complications of Alzheimer's Dementia in Feb., 2020, so I am very familiar with what happens when a person has this awful neuro-psychological disorder. It sounds as if he is in dire need of care givers. Also, people who have dementia who are driving are not only a danger to themselves but to others. There are many other complications.
A number of years ago I was attending an Alzheimer's support group. A registered nurse who had been working with dementia patients for 35 years was speaking at one of our meetings. She said to always remember that an Alzheimer's patient's reality is not your reality. They are in a totally different mind set than you. Be aware of that.
If he has a wife and son, there will be legal barriers to hurdle, even if they do not care about him. Mackay Sagebrush is offering some very good advice, as are others here.
I wish you and your friend the very best.
L.W.
Some VA hospitals have Alzheimer's facilities for vets. My dad was in one in Boise for a year before he died.
Well we found him a place to stay, found him an advocate through the VA. So far so good.
VA images from the past are still in the mind today.
We have several permanent Veterans home facilities in the area.
And I would venture to say as all states do.
They are upgraded, modern, clean, and well staffed.
And he would be among fellow vets and make friends.
Probably something that might make his life more enjoyable in his twilight years.
Everyone no matter their mental state needs human interaction.
Its part of our being......
Since the vet is 100% disabled, elderly, and cant take care of himself in most aspects of life as the OP describes.
He is probably a shoe in for a permanent resident slot when a slot on the list becomes available based on his classification.
Hope the old cat has a better life from here on out than what he has been having for a long time from the sound of it all.
Well we found him a place to stay, found him an advocate through the VA. So far so good.
That's great news, rick. Hope he's able to get one of those permanent slots at the VA, like renegade mentioned.
I'm "kinda" familiar with both sides of this. My Dad did hospice at Bay Pines VA and those people treated him like royalty until the night he passed. My Mom died from Alzheimer's and my Dad took care of her by himself for several years until the last months, when he couldn't take care of her needs by himself anymore and had some ladies com in to help him. Most folks don't realize Alzheimer's is a progressive physically debilitating disease, too.
Anyways, I really hope everything works out well for your friend. Best of Luck.