College: semi-wasted in a 7-11, I stole a bottle of Heinz Ketchup.

In the presence of my wife I stole a look at a young hottie at the resort we stayed at last weekend.

Dead man walking....😬🦫

At about age 6 a Hot Wheels that a lady turned me into my Mother. Never again.

Never stole a thing in me life, why, never saw a need. <shrugs> as an adult, I HATE thief’s, just saying.

I went on a crime spree at 5 years of age. Doing the Christmas run-a-round with mom and dad to several family members homes in one night.

I snagged a screwdriver from my grandmas house. A wooden boat from my cousin and a pocket full of Legos from another cousin.

Mom busted me when we got home, noticing my pockets were stuffed with treasures.

Dad drove me back to every house and made me apologize for being a thief, giving back the stolen goods to my victims.

Then I got my ass beat when we got back home for embarrassing my mom and dad.

Weird how that memory has never been forgotten.

🦫

A kiss this morning.

A hefty bet on UA -9 vs OSU.. Roll Tide $$$$$$$$$

Halloween candy from my kids trick-or-treat bags. Only the good stuff, you now, Reese's Peanut Butter cups and those little Snickers bars.

"I stole the election" - Joe Biden

I don't think my wife saw me, so I made a clean get away!

I share your guilt, and admit to being a repeat offender.

Stick it to the man

Bout the same age.

A frozen yogurt at the IGA.

Street sign in high school with my name on it. Dad was less than impressed.

Here I am admitting to the high crime of ketchup theft and you fellers are talking about stealing candy from babies. You basterds are lightweights.

Chrome valve stem caps “chromies”. Seven or eight years old, had to wait for the man to come back to his vehicle, so I could return them and apologize. Mom was pissed.

My wife's heart.

I’d say Goalie stole your dignity on the golf thread, but there you came, without fail, to prove you never had any to begin with.

High School graduation trip to Hawaii stoned off my ass and drunk as a skunk, drinking age 18 before Ronnie Raygun Fd it all up (Major Demonrat back then). Walked out of a store with a straw cowboy hat on my head in downtown Honolulu. Then proceeded to get into a fight with a pimp smacking his wahine around. My buddies dragged me away before the gendarmes showed up.

20ish years ago I took a little girl's pink bicycle outside of the corner club in Moscow, Idaho. It had matching pink tassels.

I rode it home drunk off my ass.

Felt bad the next day and rode it back.The only reason I remembered where I got it from was because it was always out in front of the house across the ally from that bar.

Damn. You probably made a little girl cry. But good on you for returning it.

No girl tears, that was trailer where paddler lived when he was going to med school at Moscow Training and Veterinary clinic.

I stole everything that weren't nailed down.

Then I stole the hammer.

About 9 years old, stole a slug of whiskey from the old man's bottle. I had enough sense to spit it in the sink; though I damn near returned it to the bottle. Funny how tastes change.

I don’t work as hard as I could every day, so I guess it was wages yesterday

Wheels from prams (baby carriages) were a hot commodity when I was a kid in urban England. We used em to make simple steerable wooden carts (IIRC we called em trolleys).

Besides entertainment, these carts could be used to generate income at the local train station on Saturdays. We would line up with the other kids like taxis along the outside wall and offer people help getting their luggage to their hotels (lots of stuff was walking distance back then). “Carry yer bags Mister?” we would say to passers by.

A good haul for a day’s work was about ten bob (ten shillings), a small fortune for a kid when a typical weekly allowance was a half crown coin (AKA two and six) with a value of two shillings and sixpence, said coinage first issued in 1547.

I would guess ten shillings might have been about equal to one dollar in the 1960’s.

We would usually spend the money on Airfix models of WWII aircraft and gum. In particular there was a really cool civil war bubble gum card series featuring battle scenes (I remember bayonets and abatis, dunno how realistic that was).

So anyways, when taking a short cut down a back alley walking home from school I came across a set of old pram wheels still attached to the frame some kid had left out.

I stole them, felt bad about it then, still do.

The heart of the prettiest lady in all creation.

Quite a few hearts.

Hearts, millions of em. Just like Elvis.

See the self checkout thread. Lots of guys on here steal all the time. Admittedly.

I stole the 1960 election from Nixon for Kennedy.

When we were in high school we used to siphon gas out of the cars at a car dealership. My buddy's step dad owned the place and was a real azzhole so we justified it.

1971, I was 12 years old. Stole a couple fishing lures at a dept. store with a few other kids and got caught. Will never take anything not mine till I die since then. Twenty five years later, while working a gov. job they brought me in for questioning over it, because I did not disclose it. It still came up on a background check on me.

Did you hook us all up with a Great Society vote for Johnson?

About 20 years ago, I bought four stackable indoor chairs for our basement in the Denver area. They were all in one box. I think they were around $30/each. I signed the CC receipt without looking at the amount. When I got home, I noticed the receipt was for around $30. I guess they scanned the bar code on the box, which was only for one chair. I didn't drive the 10 miles back to the store and pay them the rest. Is that "stealing"?

Far be it from me to interfere when anyone denigrated Paddler for any reason.

But U of I is a school of Agriculture and engineering. Idaho never had a Med School or Vet School. My College mates all had to apply out of state for such degrees.

But old Paddler might have been interning at one of the pregrad vet science research centers. I understand some of them even kept a herd of attractive sheep at hand.

As to the OP. I snuck a fondle of Momma's butt as she cooked dinner last night. Then I stole a bit of chicken from the plate before she served it. Both reprehensible acts for which I feel no remorse. Damned Deplorable.

A couple days after Thanksgiving at the local Vato Zone I bought some brake cleaner, light bulbs and a quart of oil. I gathered it all up along with a an oil filter for a Honda that I guess was on the counter. I looked at my receipt and didn't get charged for it. I don't even own a Honda.

A pen from my bank, this morning

I stole her...and I ain't giving her back!

Who has a list of the Statute of Limitations for every State I've ever lived in?

Went out to lunch with the preacher and some folks after church some years back. Took over an hour to get our food which was cold. Waitress copped attitude with our group as well. Glass empty more than not. Dinner finally showed up, I ordered catfish. I got it, too. Gutted and breaded then fried. Tail and other fins still attached. And cold. Top worst dining experience of my life. Well, came time to leave, and we left. Two miles up the road, wife asks if I paid the bill. Was so disgusted I had actually forgotten. Took me half a second to decide we weren’t going back to pay for a meal we should have been paid to eat. So yeah, I stole it. Never been sorry. Oughta be lauded for it, actually. If I hadn’t taken that meal, some other poor soul would have gotten it.

You're a dangerous criminal.

I got all the chocolate milks from the hampton inn breakfast

Mrs slumlord filled the yeti up with ice

I bought 144 feet of 1x10 at 1.87 a foot or something like that. The girl charged me 1.87 each. She never mentioned the price, I never looked at the receipt. Months later, I am putting these up for decoy shelves and I see it was less than $20 for $200+ worth of wood. I felt bed when I saw how awesome they looked with decoys on them but I didnt go back.

I carried my own contraband Butterfinger into the movie theater. Hell with their $8 prices.

I didn’t feel bad

dat mfker was good


Went to see IT

Part of the allure is the overpriced snacks