,....nice kids,...both of them have good jobs.

A while back the girl told me that the neighbors cats were pissin' on the corner of the house,....stinkin' it up,...

I told her that I would shoot 'em for her if that's what she wanted. But other than that I don't know what to do about pissin' cats. She thought,..then decided that idea was a bit extreme.

Last night she called and said that a skunk had stunk the yard up.

I don't know what she expects me to do about such matters. Next time she calls about animals stinking up the place I'm going to drop by and hide in the bushes with a shotgun,...tell her, "Don't mind me,...I'm just here to fix the cat and skunk situation. You might hear a shot here and there. Just shrugg it off".

Tell her to go piss in those areas next time she is riding the cotton pony.

Does that work?

It can't hurt

Motion activated water sprinkler

Watch the 5 second video

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B009F1R0G...d_r=0ade1d1c-ba51-42ba-9f66-679973cfc500

https://www.amazon.com/s?k=motion+a...ated+&ref=nb_sb_ss_midas-iss-sm_1_17

crazy boomer

Tell her to call Sleepy Joe or accept a little gunfire. Her choice.

If you have it where you are, tell her to call animal control.

dirt hole set

I guess,.....but I suspect that animal control has the same opinion about young girls complaining about pissin' cats and skunks that I do.

It's not like she's getting attacked by the neighborhood bear.

You have her a good solution, really the only feasible solution. Not sure what else you could do.

Bristoe has no sensitivity.

That’s funny as hell.

You're a dummace.

Gawd...if she does get attacked by the neighborhood bear.....please film that schit.

lolol,...seriously.

I don't understand her mentality. Does she think that because she's a renter that her landlord can perform miracles?

Cat's piss,....skunks stink up the yard.

I can't change that reality just because I bought a house and rented it out.

I thought she would get the message when I told her that I could shoot the cats. (although I'm not going to run around shooting cats, of course)

All I can figure is, she thought skunks might be a different matter.

I've been relatively polite so far. The next time she calls about something stupid, I'm going to suggest that she move back home with Mama.

I'm not going to be her Mama.

I'm not quite sure why you let her think that's your problem.

I didn't.

They probably do but at least she will be bothering them and not you.

I'm just impressed the neighborhood has its own bear.

We ain't got schit but a hand full of raccoons and a pile of yard deer.

I guess we have a neighborhood bald eagle and a couple big azz macaws.

They're pretty cool but it ain't a neighborhood bear.

ya wanna see a bear in bristoe area, you need to back up about 175 years.

Explain to her that the cat must be able to smell where you usually take a piss.

Actually, There's no known bear in the neighborhood. But nobody would be too surprised if one showed up.

A video of a bear was taken in downtown Lexington recently,....down near the University of Kentucky campus.

dirt hole set +1

Also a bit of DCON works.

animal control will handle it, that's what there for, just tell her to call them

You must be tradin' pussy for rent if she's callin' you about all these problems.

Or at the very least, should be.

Once upon a time maybe. But retirement income has more value to me than puzzy these days.

I screwed the first half of my life away. I cain't afford to screw the last half of it away.

At some point a man has to put his dick away and get serious. Otherwise he'll be out on the street.

Sounds like maybe a renter who doesn't want to get blamed for stuff from a cat she doesn't own,

Landlords keeping security deposits isn't exactly a secret.

Havaheart trap mr whiskers.
Spray paint that territory pizz marking sumbytch some awesome neon color.
And poor a bottle of fox piss cover scent on him.

Then let him loose and let owners have a nice WTF moment when he shows up at the front door wanting in.

Blasphemy

I'm not interested in keeping anybody's security deposit.

The secret to rental property is to get good renters and keep them happy,..and I do that. But I'm not going to be a cat and skunk assassin.

I mean,...I'll fix their fuggin' dripping' faucet, but I'm not going to be skulking' around the community with a 12 gauge.

People get locked up for less.

pellet gun

Good idea! I've always been more of a 220 conniber, kinda pest remover.

Sig line material.

Yea, check out my sig line from Bristoe 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Raise the rent to include animal control.
Then pocket the increase and stop answering her calls.

Havahart will catch MR skonk also . Cover it with a tarp on all sides with a flap for the door that you can just fold over leave the handle to pick it up exposed. Bait with cat food and they both will do business with it. leave it in such a way you can look in it from a distance to see if it contains a skunk or otherwise. If ole Pepe is in there just fold the tarp door over and carry it carefully off. It will almost never spray. I have hauled them off in a pickup with no problems. You can set it down and roll it easily 180 degrees over and the door will open back away and old stinky can walk out. Do what you wish at that point...

She's OK but she lost the kayak:

I'm not going to be her Mama.

I don't think that's what she has in mind. I think she wants you to take care of that skunky pussy.

Nah. I'm old enough too be her old Papaw. She's just a young girl that hasn't learned how to be out on her own yet.

She'll get there.

No but if you're hiding in the bushes it'd be entertaining.

The worst tenants I ever had were young couples renting a house for the first time. It started at the start when I got the contract back from them and they went ahead and changed all the parts they didn't like including the length of the lease which we had agreed upon earlier.

I should have trusted my gut and tore the lease up right then and told them to pound sand. Instead I printed them a new one and told them that's how it was and I wasn't changing anything. They then accepted it and went in to make my life hell.

I ended up selling the home to someone else that wanted to be their landlord. I would have made a bunch more if I would have kept it a few more years.

Bb

Simple enough, set a cat trap/cage and when you catch any take it out of town and shoot it in the trap. Empty trap on to ground then repeat as necessary.


Just bait with a tin of the cheapest cat food.

I try to trap and shoot the day before garbage pick-up.

Pix of the renter? I know that you have hidden cameras in there.

Old timers liked to use the corn cob and turpentine method on dogs.
Probably work on a cat.
Add it to your. Idea, and if the cat ever got out again
He wouldn't want to come back.

$100 that’s a future school teacher.

I usually go about things like this by setting up one of these box traps. Then release in the woods and dispatch with a shotgun, mostly because I don't want to shoot a shotgun around the farm.
Maybe tell her you're going to catch it and release it elsewhere. What you do with it then is up to you.

I would leave mr whiskers head unpainted.
For effect and not to be cruel.

A nice neon green front shoulders to tail would be stunning.
And if anyone has tried to give a cat a bath.
Well we know how that goes.......
LOL!!!

You're spot-on about the Mama thing. They just haven’t learned to cope. Funny that the male half of the enterprise hasn’t at least tried to solve the problem, which might lead to him “ benefitting”.

Buy the nice girl some of that awful-smelling animal repellant and tell her to sprinkle it everywhere Mr. Whiskers tinkles. After smelling that for a while, she’ll be yearning for the gentle scent of cat piss.

i thought i was a bad renter when i finally complained to my landlord about snow coming in the crack in the wall in my first place.

There were cats in my old neighborhood that like to go under my porch. I sprayed a small can of pepper spray under there and they never came back.

Exactly. I can't imagine calling my landlord because cats were pissing on stuff. Its what they do. The landlord's responsibility is to maintain the house...keep the heat and ac running, fix broken things, etc.....NOT neighborhood animal control. Heck call animal control instead of him.

There is a cat lady down the road from me that has developed quite the feral cat colony. They piss on stuff around my place but its only a minor annoyance....but I do have sinus problems that probably help.

OC on bushes definitely keeps cats away and a skunk is about the easiest thing a guy can trap with a Havahart.

But I’m inclined to believe these phone calls were made so when you walk through the house and smell nothing but piss and the sticky icky, she can say “Yeah I told you about.”

If you're worried about the cat, there also these devices that emit a vey high pitched beep when their motion sensor detects something. Inaudible to most humans but it keeps the cats away. Obviously don't just shoot the neighbors cat right away.

The key to happiness in the rental business is picking your renters. After a long learning process, I have found my renters. Confirmed bachelor carpenter/handyman and a confirmed bachelor taxidermist. Their shacks are only 100 feet apart, but they get along fine, could you imagine women living that close together? In 7 years, not once, have they called me to do anything. They won't even let me buy the materials. Only thing I have done for them was take the Cat over there and build them a 100 yd rifle range and a 50 yard archery/pistol range.

Neighborhood macaws are cool unless they're right behind YOUR house.

Ask me why I know?

Lol.

Or already retired.

Contact Roger, that's right up his alley. He will help her out with that skunky pussy.