... as well as old and grumpy, your wife will do things that are irritating. Mine leaves crumpled-up napkins lying on the kitchen table and on the stand between our recliners.

My wife cannot seem to understand what a trash can is for.

Mine just asks questions a different way... Multiple times, when she doesn't get the answer she's hoping for the first time.

I'm patient and don't yell, or get grumpy.... The first 3 or 4 times...

After number 3 or 4, it's gonna get sporty.

Nut in onea em, and put it back.

I’m the person that does that here. I have to make sure I don’t or she will remind me.

You guys get back to me when your wife achieves the level of running the A/C with the windows open and we'll talk.

I also have a bonus MIL who leaves used dental floss on the end table and files her nails while sitting in my recliner.

Sharing the performance of oral hygiene is a truly selfless act.

That's gotta be a hoot

Mine leaves her sweetener packets everywhere. I saved all the ones I picked up for a month and dumped them in her purse.......

Understanding light switches are two way devices is apparently harder than I thought.

How about having a whole table to put a drink on but only the edge will do?

…..only to bitch about knocking the drink off 10 minutes later

FIFY.

Not a woman in the world understands how a thermostat works in the house. They also can’t comprehend why a car doesn’t put out heat till the engines warm. It’s rocket science I tell ya. Edk

Just the opposite here at my place

I’m the pig


I let six months worth of junk mail accumulate in the passenger side floorboard. Clean it all out when it gets as high was the glove box.

Then burn it all in the backyard like some Colonel Kurtz event

Mt wife is the most wonderful woman in the world!

Laffin
115* outside and wife will get in the car and set the A/C as far down as it will go (60*) because she thinks that will make it get to her desired 75* faster.
I've probably told her a dozen times that's not how it works but still...

How about the MIL who visits and inspects all food items in the fridge & cabinets to make sure nothing is expired.

I married her sister.

Everybody's gotta have a first wife.

Lol, I like her.......

My woman makes more money than I do, and puts out regularly.

Last time we went fishing she told me I should buy a bigger boat.

No complaints.

Pffft. My own mother doesn’t even sit in my recliner. Nor my daughters, or their boyfriends. Mother in law is dead, or she would know not to as well. It is my house, I paid for it all(and built most of it) including the furniture, and that chair is where I sit when I have the time. Including when we have company. A man’s house is his castle, and visitors ought to show a certain amount of respect for the man of that house and his place. Folks who can’t grasp that concept are more than welcome to run their homes as they see fit, and stay the hell out of mine. My mother has more class than to attempt to sit in my chair. A mother in law should as well, but yours either has little respect for you or is actively trying to piss you off. Either would make her unwelcome in my home. Jeebus. What men put up with.

Maybe I just have an eye for it, but the world seems littered with floss picks - next to gas pumps, in a puddle at the mall, on the curb in the left hand turn lane. I text photos of them to my wife and ask if she needs a spare.

Braggart.

Nailed it.

As Mac Davis sang "Oh Lord it's Hard to be Humble when You Perfect in Every Way"

Surprised she survives.

I do - and would put her in the running with wabi's wife (most wonderful).
For 47 years, she's resisted the (earned) temptation to put a .38 slug between my eyes!

Does she blow her nose in them and leave them lying around?

You interested in buying them?