I've been on a complete tear this AM, banging through projects that got waylaid by my various maladies and misfortunes over the past few months. One thing I managed to knock out was a new Wordpress site. The purpose of this site is a testbed for a novel I finished a while back. Before I go about publishing it, I'd like to test it out on folks.
I actually started this dang thing back in 2016. I had just gotten my first novel published, decided to officially retire (the first time), went off deer hunting, and got the idea for the story in the stand. After all the venison was in the freezer for the season, I banged out 6 chapters. The following week, I got a call for an interview, and within the week, I'd climbed back in the saddle and was doing my bit-jockey thing again. The novel sat idle until they started closing the plant last spring. With really nothing to do and a lot of time to kill, I had ample opportunity to finish the novel. I was taking the summer off to let the thing settle and figured I'd come back to it in the fall. However, the Left Nut Job happened, and . . . well, y'all know that story.
If you were watching in 2016, you may have noticed a bunch of oddball questions on 24HCF about things like:
When did cans of spray foam insulation show up on hardware store shelves? What sort of pistol would a small shop owner keep behind the counter in 1975? . . . yeah, this is the novel.
TLEE, by the way, will end up getting a credit for being my technical adviser on this. His law enforcement experience came in very handy.
The story: The High School Newspaper Editor and his girlfriend stumble on a body and decide to solve it themselves. The twist: This may sound like Brains Benton Grows Up, but it turns into something more like James Bond.
Here's the deal: I need about 2 dozen test readers. If you guys would PM me with your full name and an email address, I will send back the location of the secret clubhouse, your account will be your 24HCF user name, and I'll include a password for access. I will post a chapter or two every week, and I'll provide a way to comment. Heck, we can probably start a thread here.
I am still riding that horse so I don't have the time to devote to a novel. But, in 1975 a shop keeper would have a Colt detective special under the counter if he liked revolvers and a pocket pistol in .32. A war relic he brought home from WWII if he is an older guy or one his father brought home from somewhere in Europe if he is a younger guy. I have a similar pistol I bought from the old sheriff many years ago. We called them a war "bring back". Some farm wife brought it in to him after her husband died for "proper disposal". kwg
I am still riding that horse so I don't have the time to devote to a novel. But, in 1975 a shop keeper would have a Colt detective special under the counter if he liked revolvers and a pocket pistol in .32. A war relic he brought home from WWII if he is an older guy or one his father brought home from somewhere in Europe if he is a younger guy. I have a similar pistol I bought from the old sheriff many years ago. We called them a war "bring back". Some farm wife brought it in to him after her husband died for "proper disposal". kwg
I finally decided to go with 38 S&W. The character who owned it was a frail older man and the pistol is found tucked in a cubby hole with his secret stash. One of the clues is he ends up dead with a East-bloc auto in his hand-- not something a normal guy would have. As the story progressed, I also needed whatever the guy had to be a weak enough round not to totally penetrate a cinder block wall. I've actually shot a cinder block with 38 S&W; it did a miserable job.
I am still riding that horse so I don't have the time to devote to a novel. But, in 1975 a shop keeper would have a Colt detective special under the counter if he liked revolvers and a pocket pistol in .32. A war relic he brought home from WWII if he is an older guy or one his father brought home from somewhere in Europe if he is a younger guy. I have a similar pistol I bought from the old sheriff many years ago. We called them a war "bring back". Some farm wife brought it in to him after her husband died for "proper disposal". kwg
I finally decided to go with 38 S&W. The character who owned it was a frail older man and the pistol is found tucked in a cubby hole with his secret stash. One of the clues is he ends up dead with a East-bloc auto in his hand-- not something a normal guy would have. As the story progressed, I also needed whatever the guy had to be a weak enough round not to totally penetrate a cinder block wall. I've actually shot a cinder block with 38 S&W; it did a miserable job.
OK I get that part of the story involves just pretending to like some of the baked goods. PLEASE consider making one of the Pie Brigade a true virtuoso. Bonus points if she is a real looker too
Dang, I went back and looked: The actual term Pie Brigade didn't make it in. I may have to remedy that.
See, back when I ran the real Black Hole Coffee House (not in a church basement), there was this thing that happened. Whenever I'd drop a girlfriend, the Pie Brigade would form in a weird nearly instinctual way. All the women would start bringing me pies, and then spend half the evening in the kitchen arguing who had brought the best pie. I was never involved. I've hen turkeys do something similar-- get to flogging each other over who's going to get serviced when.
In some cases, the pies would show up before I'd given the chick the heave. That was a sure sign they knew what was going on more than I did.
Definition of psychic 1: of or relating to the psyche : PSYCHOGENIC 2: lying outside the sphere of physical science or knowledge : immaterial, moral, or spiritual in origin or force 3: sensitive to nonphysical or supernatural forces and influences : marked by extraordinary or mysterious sensitivity, perception, or understanding
The good ones are mysterious and enchanting the bad ones are to be avoided at all costs.
Now back to this pie maestro, could she be say a swimmer or long distance runner so she can sit around the coffee house and eat pie covered in fresh whipped cream late into the night? Asking for a friend.
Is the Pie Brigade anything akin to the Casserole Cascade that shows up right after the untimely passing of a woman whose husband is still kicking, has a house paid for and no record of beating the dearly departed?
Watched the parade of church women with covered dishes show up at my recently passed Father-in-law's when my wife's Mother made her break from this world of woe. They were hip deep to a tall Indian at the back door, fighting for parking spaces for the Fairlanes making sure he did not starve, for weeks. Wife and her sister about resorted to setting up a sniper's nest to cull the worst offenders.
Let's keep the Pie Brigade on a much higher level. I'd like to suggest Michelle Jenneke as the top tiered high school pastry chef. If she happened to enjoy helping to track and drag deer out of the woods I'd be good with that too
Have to go to You Tube to see the first one . Lets try another
It's funny, but I actually wrote my first novel out in the open on TLEE's old board. TLEE's best advice was after reading chapter 2 and saying "Where are the tits?" I turned around and wrote in a torrid affair with a water nymph that gave me maybe 10 chapters of good fodder.
You guys? You're thinking about pie.
BTW: Due to TLEE's prodding, I found out that my first novel's treatment of sex romping was very popular, and I really enjoyed feeding it.
BTW#2: The femme fatale in that first novel is the same one in this. This is somewhat of a prequel to the first book-- at least it exists in the same universe. The difference is the femme fatale in this one is just learning her trade. It is later revealed in the first novel (#2 predates #1 by 5-6 years), that she's a spy that got to go to KGB Blow Job Training. On second thought (sorry) the novel that's out on Amazon, doesn't have the femme fatale. She got bumped to the second book of the trilogy. Sorry, even I get lost sometimes.
Is the Pie Brigade anything akin to the Casserole Cascade that shows up right after the untimely passing of a woman whose husband is still kicking, has a house paid for and no record of beating the dearly departed?
Watched the parade of church women with covered dishes show up at my recently passed Father-in-law's when my wife's Mother made her break from this world of woe. They were hip deep to a tall Indian at the back door, fighting for parking spaces for the Fairlanes making sure he did not starve, for weeks. Wife and her sister about resorted to setting up a sniper's nest to cull the worst offenders.
I like pie but if you think you need to go R rated or more to sell books, you could cover Michelle Jenneke in whipped cream.....
It's kind of fun reimagining Senior year of high school with a bit of artistic license.... well OK Michelle Jenneke even without whipped cream would be a lot of creative memory but good Lord that woman has some moves.
First chapter does a great job hooking you. Very believable with the Bengal's losing. What was old Ardno up to? I am anxious to keep reading and find out. My favorite fiction books all have the same type of character as the the protagonist. Smart and quick witted. Seems like yours will be along the same lines. One thing that may be missing is I don't think we ever get his name in the first chapter.
I read the first and already want to read the next few. BTW what are your other books I will have to look them up and buy them?
The background of the website reading it also is rough. The lines of the notebook paper in the back sometimes line up with the words and other times are running directly through the words.
Chapter 2 was great. Detective did a good job of acting busy and not wanting to listen to the kid until he finally realized the kid may actually be on to something.
Chapter 3 girl comes up and asks if he is Jack, never says what her name is until he says "When Ken’s acts came on, I left Kara, where she was an, pulled my beanbag around so she could see better."
While the rest of you guy keep thinking about cheerleaders in the back seat of lowriders.... I'm still stuck on pie. There I said it, guess I'm officially an old guy now.
There is good pie and in rare cases there is transcendent pie. Pretty much anyone can follow a pie filling recipe and get good results but the crust seems to involve a kind of alchemy. This woman may have cracked the code.
Please do continue to develop the female characters surrounding the protagonist "fully" but if some of that includes the mention of a trace of flour noticeable inside the chevage of her low cut blouse well that could work...
Chapter 3 girl comes up and asks if he is Jack, never says what her name is until he says "When Ken’s acts came on, I left Kara, where she was an, pulled my beanbag around so she could see better."
Thanks. I've got to fix that.
Originally Posted by clwg97
The background of the website reading it also is rough. The lines of the notebook paper in the back sometimes line up with the words and other times are running directly through the words.
Chapter 2 was great. Detective did a good job of acting busy and not wanting to listen to the kid until he finally realized the kid may actually be on to something.
I'm not particularly tied to the background. I'll see what I can do.
I loved Det. McAninch. He's the ultimate Dirty Columbo. I could write him all day.
It's funny, but I actually wrote my first novel out in the open on TLEE's old board. TLEE's best advice was after reading chapter 2 and saying "Where are the tits?" I turned around and wrote in a torrid affair with a water nymph that gave me maybe 10 chapters of good fodder.
You guys? You're thinking about pie.
BTW: Due to TLEE's prodding, I found out that my first novel's treatment of sex romping was very popular, and I really enjoyed feeding it.
BTW#2: The femme fatale in that first novel is the same one in this. This is somewhat of a prequel to the first book-- at least it exists in the same universe. The difference is the femme fatale in this one is just learning her trade. It is later revealed in the first novel (#2 predates #1 by 5-6 years), that she's a spy that got to go to KGB Blow Job Training. On second thought (sorry) the novel that's out on Amazon, doesn't have the femme fatale. She got bumped to the second book of the trilogy. Sorry, even I get lost sometimes.
To quote a highly 'Americanized' little Thai guy I used to work with opinion on movies,"No sex, no violence, ...me no watch".
[ To quote a highly 'Americanized' little Thai guy I used to work with opinion on movies,"No sex, no violence, ...me no watch".
This novel has both. However, I would defend both the sex and the violence in this way. At no time in any of my novels do I ever dwell on any of it, and it's all about moving the plot along or giving depth to the character. One thing that usually turns me off is when a writer dwells on describing the mechanics of sexual acts:
". . . he thrust his throbbing member. . . "
. . . that kind of stuff. As a reader, I usually skip over it.
With violence and sex, I try and downplay the actual carnage. The reason is that the reader's mind does a far better job of filling in details than any writer can attempt to do.
Yeah, this novel has a body count, and it's significant considering the protagonist is a high-schooler. However, I don't like writing about the effects of bullets passing through body parts.
The background of the website reading it also is rough. The lines of the notebook paper in the back sometimes line up with the words and other times are running directly through the words.
Fixed. Well, at least I tried something different. The background now stays static while the text scrolls. I'd been looking for that control since I installed the weblog. I knew it was there, but the documentation for the theme was ambiguous. Let me know what you think.
The background of the website reading it also is rough. The lines of the notebook paper in the back sometimes line up with the words and other times are running directly through the words.
Fixed. Well, at least I tried something different. The background now stays static while the text scrolls. I'd been looking for that control since I installed the weblog. I knew it was there, but the documentation for the theme was ambiguous. Let me know what you think.
It definitely looks a lot better to me! Thank you!
So I bought The Glenfield on Kindle I can read it on the computer but when I search for the book on my Kindle the search results don't show it anywhere? I've checked the spelling tried all capital letters my latest gen kindle shows zip?
Maybe I'm missing something simple (it wouldn't be the first time) or maybe there is a glitz. Anyone else tried to download this?
So I bought The Glenfield on Kindle I can read it on the computer but when I search for the book on my Kindle the search results don't show it anywhere? I've checked the spelling tried all capital letters my latest gen kindle shows zip?
Maybe I'm missing something simple (it wouldn't be the first time) or maybe there is a glitz. Anyone else tried to download this?
I use the kindle app on my Iphone so I usually buy the books on the computer then just have find it in my purchases on my phone and download it. I am not sure if that helps or not.
So I bought The Glenfield on Kindle I can read it on the computer but when I search for the book on my Kindle the search results don't show it anywhere? I've checked the spelling tried all capital letters my latest gen kindle shows zip?
Maybe I'm missing something simple (it wouldn't be the first time) or maybe there is a glitz. Anyone else tried to download this?
I use the kindle app on my Iphone so I usually buy the books on the computer then just have find it in my purchases on my phone and download it. I am not sure if that helps or not.
Yes it did, easy to get on my phone which lead me to discover I had my Kindle set on airplane mode.... (need a Homer Simpson slapping his head saying "Doh!" ) Icon... Thanks.
As an aside, I have to say I found the description of that most recent slice of pumpkin pie to be well, kind of lack luster... Hey you asked, just saying
For the book lovers here is a note about my latest Kindle.... I mostly love it
It's way faster than the earlier generation Kindles I've used. I don't think my brain even registers the time page changes take now. I call it digital crack cocaine for readers.
It has plenty of storage to hold Audible books too. When connected to a Blue Tooth device you can switch from text to listening if you want. I have a bunch of Audible books on my phone so I have not played with that feature yet.
It's plenty light enough so holding it with one hand is not a problem But, the on off button is on the bottom of the device. When reading in bed it's easy to bump it off. It seems like Amazon could put that control on top of their "next" next generation Kindle.
When the Wi Fi is left on the battery life is nowhere near as long as claimed... Airplane mode helps a bunch with that but you need to remember to turn that off before attempting to download anything.... Hopefully I'll remember that now.
I think his 3rd? Oh and Shaman, I spent the whole 0.99 to buy The Glenfield rather that get it included in Kindle unlimited. I'm pretty frugal in general so you should take that as high praise....
I think his 3rd? Oh and Shaman, I spent the whole 0.99 to buy The Glenfield rather that get it included in Kindle unlimited. I'm pretty frugal in general so you should take that as high praise....
Chapter 10 "Gordon and Griff showed up. They were properly chastened by what had happened the previous week. Both apologized profusely and begged me to stay." shouldn't it be Gordon and Grey?