I know Im new here and haven't posted much... My boyfriend of 3 years broke up with me last night... We both have many differences, but i cant see myself without him... i've said some really mean things to him that I didn't mean.. I tried taking my own life last night... and i could stop thinking all the people i would hurt doing that... I know its a very selfish thing to do.... but if so hard to breath... I know i need help and but there so much pain...
How do you cope when all hope seems gone... all dreams have died... How do you cope when you've given every peace of your heart to your to the one only that has been there for you? and now I have no one that could understand me and hold me... make me feel safe... I don't know how to move on... and start over... I can't handle this...

Don't quit 5 minutes before the miracle.


Mike

Hmmmmmmm.

He screwed up! Not you!! Your better off without him!!!

Dgal----Nothing hurts as much as losing/breaking up with someone you love and there is nothing that takes that pain away except time.

We've all been there and know how much it hurts now.. but each day gets easier. Kinda like hunting in steep terrain....it's tough going up that hill and you might slip and fall but you have to continue up that hill. Once you reach the top the view is incredible and while you can see the crooked path you took to get there it doesn't look so bad...in fact the journey itself is what makes the view so much better.

Please be good to yourself and if you need help there are many resources available. Seek out those you love and trust...seek out the comfort of your faith and remember that this tremendous pain is only temporary...it gets better...soooo much better.

God Bless and be strong!

Never hurt from a lost relationship that I didn't look back on later and not be thankful it ended.

It's darkest before the dawn... Met my wife of 20+ years a couple months after getting dumped in devastating fashion. The pain, and personal growth, of the heartbreak was necessary in order to understand what I'd found when I met Cyn.

Hang in there. And stop dicking around with suicide!!!! Buck up, trooper.

I dont think that you are going to get the kind of help you need here, you need to be with family and or friends and discuss this with them, not a bunch of strangers online.

He is such a great guy and has been there for me when no one has... I just wish this never happened... Thank you so much for your kind works of wisdom AcesNeights!

AcesNeights

I could not of said it any better.

Ditto for me as well... does suck to be going through it though... the old saying about just going "one day at a time" really does have merit

Find a really hot chick and rebound, that'll show him!

I wish I could go to family and friends... They are just like strangers to me... They never approved of me... I've always been alone when it came to things like this... and thats why i have reached out to you all.

Wish in one hand and [bleep] in the other and see which one fills up faster.

Screw wishing, what if's, whys, don't make a hill of beans nor does it change the events, it's about the now. Bad form to allow events to control oneself.

I'm assuming he is probably a great guy as I'm assuming you are a great gal, that don't mean you were great for one another, such is life.

Don't worry, as bad is it may seem right now it will probably be worse tomorrow so enjoy the now.

is the boyfriend a campfire member?

Dgal,stop thinking about cashing in,I've felt like that was the answer but always found a reason not to do it.

you have a good heart to love somebody like that,you will find love again.

remember,guy's are like the mid town bus,there is another one coming along in 10 minutes.

BTW,it took a good hard slap from Steelhead for me to get my head straight too,he is a wise and to the point guy.

We both though we were soul mates..... I guess not... I will miss him dearly!

Far worse things then being wrong (unless it's putting the moves on a chick with a dick).

Actually I don't think anyone was wrong as I'm sure you probably were for a time, just not now.

Still not one for wrong, right, what ifs. Remember, water is wet, women tell little lies, the sky is blue and who gives a [bleep].

Never, ever, give another person ALL of yourself.

Reserve just enough of yourself....so that when they fail(and they will), you can still walk away with your head screwed on straight, and enough of your pride/self-respect left to navigate the truth and move on.

Best of luck.

I don't know how to help you get by this, but I will guarentee that if you do, a year of so from now you will see it's the best thing that could happen.
Gut it out and wait for the sunshine.

If you're anywhere near Austin,let me know... I can cheer you up...

It's difficult to make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich without the jelly. Although the jelly can cause a greater mess you don't get the whole sandwich without unscrewing the jelly jar.

One doesn't need to throw the jelly jar lid away but you do need to open it if you want it all.

Thanks Houndgirl, I now know that is was a mistake.... and I knew when I fell for him....But i never saw this day...

Sounds like he is mean.

I'd also recommend taking up Bart's offer, 15 minutes around him and you'll realize just how much YOUR life don't suck (cept for that 15 minutes of course)........

Thank brotherbart... but no im a little ways away!

if a guy dressed like Hitler playing the Banjo doesn't cheer you up nothing will.

See, your luck is improving by the minute....

Very good advice, HG.

Trust me, time will heal your heavy heart..took me six months with a lost love..it is not easy...and you can love more than one person in your life..I know...

Giving up is an answer to nothing. I can tell you there is worse out there and that you will move on. I have talked about this often, but in June 2000, I both welcomed the birth and buried my son. This sounds crazy to even say, but without that happeneing, I would not have had the two beautiful girls that I have been blessed with. I am not looking to one-up anyone or highjack the thread.

Will this put a smile on your face??


Its Bart mimicking his avatar.

I sorry for you loss... Kyfred... but thank you for you advise

They do look a like!
Thanks

Save just enough jelly to make another sandwich, which was my point.

It did mine!!!!!!!!!!!! Tom that is danged funny right there!



dgal I agree with HG. In fact, were I you I'd start giving you all of you!

Merry Christmas and hang in there cos there are more of us out here. In fact, some of us are the good guys who really care.

Your playing with fire, scarecrow

Speaking of which, shouldn't your ass be in the kitchen baking cookies for me...

That's what I was thinking...

You both can just shuuuuut UP<grin>!

I've given up my kitchen venture.

Really?

I pinky swear! I now limit my talents to other rooms in the house<grin>.

what happened HG the laundry and ironing piling up?
just kidding.

Everyone's luck is improving tonight.

Say on...........

she ran out of jelly

For what it's worth I think you would do well to give it some time and learn to be a secure person on your owne. Once you can feel confident not needing anyone you'll be ready for a relationship. Stay strong and never give up.

Can???

David and I got together for your Christmas present Jane, enjoy!

And you will morn this and get through it.

I want you to think about something. No one in this world should be so attached to another that they can not live without them. That kind of dependancy strains a relationship. The fear on loosing someone causes kind of a panic to set in whenever there is a strain in the relationship, and that makes it worse.

You need to learn to rely on you. You need to realize that yes you are stong enough and very capable of standing on your own. Short of God Almighty, you should give no one the power to crush your will to live.

By the way, most men like strong self determined women. You have that in you, find it.

Yep, the only person I know that will always be there for me is ME.

Any advice if someone has the power to crush my balls?

sleep on your belly.

Big +1

Yeah, always guard your boys

No, she's THAT heavy.....

fixed it for ya.

dgal you laughing yet? that's all that matters at this point!!!!!!

Cooool. But I'd prefer it if both of you guys did them without your pants on.

Thank you!

In a very small kitchen.....

oooohhhh...

see that's different.

um, yeah I can't answer that on an open forum.

AAAAAAaaaaa!! Mind's eye bleach!
Jessica Simpson. Jessica Simpson. Jessica Simpson. Jessica Simpson. Whew. That's better

Scary part about that is the pics would wind up here. Kinda like these.

Danged pig hunters.

http://sendables.jibjab.com/view/PxnnsBkHYpzHrjVl

Thanks Houndgirl, I now know that is was a mistake.... and I knew when I fell for him....


There's your answer right there. You openly admit it was a mistake and that you knew it was a mistake at the time... and the WHOLE time.

Self caused grief is the worst kind. THAT is your biggest hurdle right now, not whether or not to live. And, since you've openly admitted it, you've already taken the first step. Time to forgive yourself the foolishness, isn't it?

After that there's only one thing left to do.
Live!
Which of course is the only thing you've ever had to do anyway so you already know how. Don't ya.

Dgal, post a picture, I'm sure you would draw lots of interest here. Besides, it'd be good to know who we're talking to.

Did somebody mention Jessica.

Hey Jessica where are you?

If you follow that suggestion, use the trash can until you know exactly where the disposal is located. No sense making a bigger mess.

Bullschitt!

If you're going to love, you go all in. That's living. Sometimes you're heart will get destroyed and sometimes you will break another's heart but at least you didn't half azz it.

Yes... you all are so funny!

Thats what he would tell me..to let myself fall in love and not try to hold it back.... I couldnt tell him I loved him... cause that was admitting it. And when I realized I was head over hills with him... it was to late... I gave him everything....

Or having someone poking an eye....

I tend to agree with this dude.

I don't have a whole lot to give in this area because i'm not exactly a "bundle of love" to begin with but what I do have is fully invested.

I'm coming up on 18 yrs with my wife.

I'd hate to look back on all of that & wish I'd have gave more/trusted more/loved more or what ever.

Probably will someday but i am doing my best with what i've got realtime.

im not good with the words. sometimes its better to paint a pitur . just be glad yur not in my spot...

I did the same thing this Buck season and he didn't show up once. I got over it.

Not what your "friends" said in Arizona.

Just saying....

and so it begins....

or these--we know there are others Dave----btw---they still around??

Hey! stop making fun of my friends!!!

http://www.lineofduty.com/content/view/105081/128/

My my my Dave.

Reminds me of the movie Dodgeball...

This is just way too funny. Think I've seen that at the National Zoo.

See what we got here Dgal?

I try to sell Tom's custom 264 rifle for a gay rights fundraiser at "his request" or something as such.

Then I tell everyone about the giant beaver that attacked him.

He tells about some .... gay thing i guess I went to in arizona, then they painted my big black truck gay rainbow colors...

Then I tell everybody Tom went for breast reduction surgery and they accidentally did a sex change on him...

And so on & so forth... on & on & on...

My point is, this is a house of love sister. Just a big ole happy sappy conglomo of.... niceness & such.


You're in a safe place here.

No really, seriously.

This thread is

yup

...
....
.....
......

haha!
Now that is good, I need an avatar like that one!!!!!!

Well if it is, it aint funny.

Seriously not cool.

He was referring to his "specially painted" truck just for the event.

That's some nice work right there.

can you put the monkey in the truck?

You forgot about hunting in loafers....

Im not good enough.

I think that was ingwe....

I forget.

no wait, he was the striesand fan...

Dunno...It was all so shocking....

It was Ingwewe.

You guys keep this up and I am gonna need a new keyboard!

ahh yes, ingweewee..



loafers, barbara S. & that... white big nosed... wtf his name???
manalow!!!

or how ever you spell any of this.



I don't know how to spell manalow or striesand and i'm kind of proud of that.

One the posters above drove this in an AZ parade


Dgal you'll feel better. Time normally is the best cure for things like this!

That one straddlin' the main gun looks built for comfort. Bob

Truck looks like it belongs in the Rose Parade.

<sniff>

<sniff>

Yep.............

Bait.

No thanks.

A long term solution to a short term problem is not the answer!

Is Dgal playing us?

that would be.....


mean.

Human Beings are resilient critters, if they allow themselves to be so. Which sounds like something Houndgirl would say

Suicide is a good way to prove that your enemies were right about you. I'd suggest not giving them the satisfaction

When I get down I am reminded of a very pretty young professional woman who walked up to me a few years ago, and with heartfelt gratitude said, "I can never thank you enough, you changed my life!". The story was she was a little down on herself when I met her, due to failed relationships. I possibly could have wound up dating her myself, but instead introduced her to a good friend. They are still married six or seven years later. I am sorta invested in them as well.

Ditto another good friend, who is normally a devoted Christian and family person. She was very distraught one day, and confessed to suicidal thoughts. I promised her, that I would always be her friend, and I always will be. I believe she's now coping.

Don't isolate yourself. Reach out to old friends, and new. Offer to have a party at your place, for the neighbors. Get a change of pace - hobbies, volunteer at a charity, do something to help others. If you're really that close to the brink, then do get professional help. You'll be surprised at how many people will go out of their way to make company for single people, during the Holidays.

That it would.....I dont think I could forgive her.

Jessica was mean too.

the 3 ... pattern sure do look familiar huh?

Girl-Gal---hmmmmmmm

no I wouldnt do that...

...

Tell ya a purtty good temporary fix. Go get ya a couple of drinks, fine some good looking guy or he will find you, and "give it up".

I got some Ocean-front property out here in Az for sale.

Dgal
Quit messing with these amateurs and try the suicide hotline. Seriously. They are professionals.

First I can't go on vacation and trust you guys...

Now I can't take an evening off and trust you guys....

and BTW Dave, not knowing how to spell Streisand or Manilow and being "proud " of it is just another form of " Pride"....

IFFFFF ya know what I mean....


Ingwe

My wife and I spent a loooong evening in the ER with a much beloved, immediate family member who took a bunch of pills to end her "suffering". It was a wake up call for all of us, one that she almost didn't wake up to.

Different issues, but the same degree of depression and despair. What a loss that would have been.....can't even begin to imagine. Lots of talks, a bit of counseling and alot of time together got her back to feeling "worthy" again. Seems a bit like what you have described, albeit, caused by different occurances and/or situation.

I remember watching some interviews of some folks that thought that they would end their suffering as well.....by leaping off the Golden Gate Bridge. If I remember correctly, there were only less than a handful that have lived to describe those last feelings and thoughts. Several of these survivors were being interviewed and each one of them said that once they let go of that handrail, they wondered what the heck they thought they were doing.......and to whom? They went on to explain the fear and other desperate feeling that they felt during their plunge, but suffice it to say, they all had some serious 2nd thoughts once they lost physical contact with that railing.

Just my way of sayin'.......considering such serious actions as you have isn't unique to you......believe me. The fact that others who were also so inclined during some part of their lives to harm themselves are in fact here to help you get through "your time", should tell you that there is indeed a light at the end of your currently, dark tunnel.

My loved one and I have had many wonderful experiences together since that evening in the ER. I remind her now and then that such experiences wouldn't have been nearly as wonderful and fulfilling without her.

There are issues to deal with still, but at least she's here to deal with them........as are you.......

Allow yourself the opportunity to move on with your life. An often used line, but so true, "This ain't dress rehersal". No, unfortunately, it is not.

Take care Dgal..........

How come this thread reminds me of Brother Dave's child support thread of a while ago ?????????

I could be wrong ... I was once before ... thought I made a mistake.

{^-^}

Oh great...I messed myself. .....again.

How much ya got? How much ya askin'? We're looking for a place. Sand or rocks, is there a dock? can I catch bass. Is there a place to put my bass tracker? Will you take a snow blower in on trade?

any guns for sale?

All I can say is , GOD and Time, will heel all pain.

!!!Not suicide.....!!!! It will just cuase more pain..

Take a long walk,sit under a big tree,on a big hill,from dawn till dusk, you'll be ok.


Vic

Just when I had given up on women forever, and was about to end it all...I met my wife. She too, was hurting from a broken relationship. We consoled one another. She is and was the most wonderful woman in the world...for me. We've been together 32 years, raised 4 good kids. Where would they be if I had ended it all? I would have never known happiness like I have now. As far as the gal that had me all broken up? I saw her a while back. She's alright, I guess, but she sure was not worth my grief. My wife is 10 times the person, and she has loved me unconditionally. We fuss sometimes, but just so we can have great make-up sex. My wife is 50 now, and she is still the most beautiful woman I've ever known...bar none. It's because we have been through so much together, and we have remained committed to one another...come what may.

When you find the right one, you will see that you would not know the right one if it had not been for knowing the wrong ones. The wrong one's have their purpose too, dear.

Hang on, he's on his way. Don't look for him...he will find you.

My 2 cents.

Well, the 24hcf hasn't had a drama or suicide thread for awhile.

hang in there Dgal, if that's who you really are.

Jessica, you are at it again I see.

My vote is that HG is bored again. Ned must be off working.

Would be nice to see an IP address. What are the odds that Dgal would show up out of Washington?

3 threads

new member on 8/24/09

Funny on 09/07/09

and then this one


boyfrien in TX????? Boss Hoss?, love em and leave em I reckon


if it's legit hope thing work out

if it's leg pullin....ingwe has a cigar for you to smoke in a very warm climate

People here don't give much leeway to the women folk.. When I think back over the years, the break up of a marriage and the bashing Stick gave the female. First post by ELF, and even with Houndgirl..

But the thing is, when the people here take them in and in-brace them they become family.

Its kind of nice!

DGal is not Jessica and she is for real.

May take you up on that snow blower, moving to Mi purty soon!

I'm not falling for that one again. I'll need proof to believe.

If I ever do anything as pathetic as the original post somebody please come up here and kick the [bleep] out of me. If that is for real the last place she oughta be is on the internet asking for advise - I'd say a 72 hour hold in a psych ward bare minimum. Christ, quit whining - there're folks in the world with REAL problems.

Bullchit.....you believe in fairies....but yet find it hard to believe that a person could be hurting from relationship woes?........figgers.

Actually, if this were a ruse then the OP would have to drop that bomb to make it effective. I think that would have happened before 14 pages of posts. It wouldn't be funny anyway.

I don't see how anyone would think a suicide thread was a good idea for a joke.


We either have someone who is really hurting here or someone who has very poor taste in amusing themselves. I tend to think it's the former.

DGAL,
Sorry to hear about your loss. Make your work your life until things get better. Look for the morning sun and think of all the people that are going through the same thing. Don't hang onto the pain, one day at a time things will get better.

What's your point of taking what I said in another thread and posting it here?

FWIW, the thread wasn't a joke and some may want to reflect on how they responded. Dgal is doing better as far as I can tell and didn't solely rely on the board for help. I think she was turning to anyone that she could reach out to quickly. It appears that there are some that wouldn't come to a person's aid when called upon.

Thank goodness there are more than can be there for you.

rrroae,

My response wasn't directed at you. I just did a quick reply.

What Dgal has to realize is that a man is not her girlfriend, he thinks and acts like a man. He is not going to be the one to sit and "feel" with you, to share your pain. He is the one that will try to fix the problem. If that problem is insurmountable to him, or if she resists him trying to fix it, or adds to the problem, he will feel defeated.

She States:



We men don't see that like women. We don't count that you may just be acting out of emotion, because we control our emotions. The fact is, to us, you said it so you ment it. Such a thing would not come out in an emotional moment if it wasn't lingering in there anyway.


Then there is the emotional baggage. As I said in a previous post, men like a strong woman. The fact is that if you ask someone to carry your baggage, he will get tired of the weight. Deal with your own emotions and be strong.

Men have the challenge of controlling their sexuality. In order to be good husbands and boyfriends they have to choose fidelity, even though it is not natural to them. Women's challenge is to control their emotions. To run them through a filter of logic and reason before expressing them. And no, PMS is not a gull dern excuse!! Any more than, "she was super hot and I was drunk" is an excuse.

Maybe Dgal should read this book before pursuing another relationship.

http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d.html?a=0060520612

I glanced through a copy once and it seems to hit men on the head.

Two things to the point, especially the first one:

he is a fairy.

Yep

Dgal,

Your just starting out. The road can be rough sometimes. Think ahead. Lot's of good times and good memories to be had.

You get thru this and it will make you stronger and a little wiser.

Best of luck and hang in there.

JM.

This was/is for real & I'm glad to hear dgal is doing better.

Don't be a stranger dgal.

There is plenty of bench room around this fire.

Hang in there. We've all gone through this at one time or another and survived.

LMAO! I bought that book a long time ago and although it has 'some' useful info, most of it is a load of SH*T and makes men out to be a bunch of idiots. (I know you all are smarter than that ;o) To DGAL~ go talk to somebody, this site is free and that doesn't mean everyone on it is a licensed DR. able to help you in the best way. I am sure if your family knew how you felt they would be more than willing to help you find someone to talk to.

Can't be said any better than that.

proof that some thoughts are definately better left unspoken.....

Dgal: Sounds like a bummer day, but please dispose of those original thoughts.

When things get tough I go back to 2 thoughts.... First, one can always hang on for another five minutes. Second, I could loose absolutely everthing and start over. I'm smart, I am somebody, and there are things I can do.

Now two suggestions... Join and become very active in a church (any church). Visit a community councilor or pastor and talk this out with someone.

This is an especially tough time of year. Those folks that you worry about hurting obviously mean something to you. Get in touch with them too.

Lastly, we are a rather faceless bunch here, but there are many that care, and some professionals that can likely offer up some sound and substantial advice.

Do stay on board here, and let us know how things are going.

Good luck, 1Minute

PS If you don't have one, get down to a shelter and get a puppy. It will always love you regardless of the day.

Agreed

No amount of online coddling will help the girl. She broke up with a guy she felt strongly about, that sucks. She's still better off than the guys coming home from the middle east missing limbs or a 33 year old friend of mine who lost her husband on Monday and now has 2 kids to raise without their father. Life can be rough, if a relationship ending brings you to the brink of taking your own life you need to get some professional help.

It is amazing how utterly callous and clueless people can be. Fortunately, I haven't been in the position that Dgal found herself, but I would hope that I would have a solid support system that I could turn to in a moment of need.

She did get help from professionals and that is what they are there for. She also turned to others that she considered a loose form of family. Basically, she did what I think I would have done is to call in all my markers at once if I was near the end.

Being harsh and critical of someone doing all that they can in a time of extreme need is beyond my comprehension.

I once opened my heart and gave my all to a love named Jessica. Now my heart is cold and black, unable to open and allow anyone in ever again.

My Jess ruined me, I will never love another.

Thanks a lot JANE!

Best advice yet.

You guys sound like Dr. Phil. And I'd like to kick Dr. Phil in the pelvis. (that's the bone structure that my foot would connect with if I kicked him hard enough in the nuts)

This is someon's daughter we are talking about and I'm ok with the fact that she trusted this group with her problem.

I'd also like to note that amongst those that manned up & took the chance that this might be for real... were a couple of our resident black sheep. Such as steely & bart.

These are the same kind of guys that can take an occasional beating from someone swinging a bible.

Moments of truth.

The cream always rises to the top.

They are the blacksheep? Hell, I thought everybody else was and they were the normal ones.

They both have the kind of good that counts for something. You too Dave.

JM

Well spoken, Sir,

+1

GTC

Well, I'm not going to comment on the sad state of society when someone has to confide their interpersonal issues with complete strangers.

Some say the anonymity is therapeutic.

But everything is not always flowers and butterflies, and even the most sincere of emotions will seem phony to others that have not experienced similar, or are wired different.

I'm certain that the number of phooey responses would be lower if she was a trusted or verified individual.

In that absence, everyone sees her as they are conditioned.

If she's really got a problem, she can take solace in the diversity of the comments. Serious to some, not so to others, BS to others.

Just goes to show, its "just a thing" and NOT the end of the world.

Hell, if everyone got all mushy, than it may seem like she really does have a life altering event.

Life, at it's finest....

I would rather look like a fool than take the chance of making somebody who's down on their luck feel worse.

Alot of us play rough on here, but stomping someone that takes the risk of opening up about a problem they have deserves a helping hand.

just my 2 cents,

What is Dgal doing here, she's talking to a bunch of mostly guys. She is going to get the straight advise, not the connecting with her B.S. What has she gotten here, everything from fatherly advise to a smack in the head. Both have there merits and can be useful to her. Sometimes the treatment for the disease is more painful than the disease. I think she posted here out of a desire not to be coddled, somewhere inside her she wants the straight chit. Maybe she needs advise from someone who is not connected with her, a stranger that can lay it on the line and walk away.



Which she should realize that it is not, but maybe should be. If all this pain ends up making her grow, making her see herself and correct her own problems and perceptions. I have to ask all you older guys, How many life altering events that you learned from hurt like hell? And didn't that pain make you see more clearly than you did before?


At least no one hit on her.

I heard a fella say one time that there is no pain in spiritual growth . The pain comes from resisting spiritual growth .

I kind of think he is right . Surrendering to the reality of a failed affair of the heart is the only way to get relief . Some never do , and no one does it quickly .

If there ever was something that calls for " One day at a time " therapy , it's a broken heart .

Mine got broke so bad one time that I never got all the pieces back . I've made do with a thumping gizzard ever since then !

same thought here, which is why I replied as I did. If it is just a joke, oh well, I wasted a few minutes writing.

You didn't waste nuthin.

You did good.

Sometimes you gotta know when to "pop up".

Stand up.

what's the worse could happen?

My thoughts exactly.

I hope today was brighter for her...but I'm sure tomorrow will be even better!

Hope my monkey cheered her up?!!

I reluctantly have to report that it was Tom's monkey picture that pulled her out of it. She said "Is that Ingwe? He's so cute!"

Couldn't agree with you more, no harm in assuming the post is legit, what's a little egg?

Hi Dgal,

Hang in there ok?
Break ups suck, even when you know it's been over for awhile already. Everyone deals with it different tho, so advice that works for me might not work for you.
Just keep your chin up.
There's a bunch of life out there for you, smile and go grab some.

Is this the first shoe ?

Glad to know she's donig better longbob. good to hear that she got help when she needed it.

Dgal,

This will pass. You'll feel a little better each day. Stick with your friends, come on here and bug us goofballs, and do things that make YOU happy and you'll be just fine.

Tom