Got the news this afternoon. Just don't understand it. He let no one know he was in trouble. This is really hard to comprehend. He was like a brother to me, I loved him, been friends since high school for almost 40 years. I'm just sick.

Sorry to hear it, squirrel. That's a rough one.

Sorry for your loss, but nothing One can do, don't beat yourself up About it.
No one knows what is going on inside a person, just try to comfort those that need it, and be there if they need anything.

Prayers

I am completely confused. He had two kids and his wife and he separated about a year ago but it seemed amicable and just saw them together last week and they seemed happy. Now this. He acted like nothing was wrong.

Mental illness many times go un treated, the results can be devastating to many more than just the one thats ill .

I'm very sorry to hear of your loss and the loss to his family.

Despite what we like to think, we don't always see any signs that something is amiss.

RIP.

Best wishes, Chris

Andy,

sorry to hear of your loss....lost a family member to the same thing 46 years ago yesterday, on March 26, 1970....

was a senior in high school... still haunts me every year.. making it hard to fall asleep last night and tonight... I was the one who found them and cut them down from a rope at 4 in the morning...

I understand why people do this.. but its hard to rationally explain...they just get to a place in a depression that life doesn't seem worth it...I don't think its always a mental defect....but far back in their lives, they were taught that their value isn't worth much or even worthless.. and at times of depression, they just give in to it and remove themselves from the planet... or combine that with they are dealing with enough negativity in their lives, they don't feel like hanging around and dealing with it anymore...

drugs or alcohol can potentiate it... I've talked multiple people down from it, being on the verge of it... during my lifetime...I think understanding where their head is at, and being able to talk them thru, giving them purpose and letting them know we all feel overwhelmed at times, or just feel like screw it.... but the sun will rise tomorrow one way or the other....

and the real damage is to those they care about who are left behind...

may the Good Lord be with you and your friend's loved ones during this tragic time....may his spirit find the peace he was seeking...

There is no why and I'd not focus on it or worry about it, because it will get you NO WHERE.

Do what you can for his kids and live a good life.

I am very sorry to hear of this news. Prayers for all involved in this tragedy.

Prayers for those left behind.

This.

I hate to here that. All you can do is try and be there for his family and maybe do the things with his kids that he would have done on occasion. We don't always know what is going on inside someone. Sometimes the people that seem to be doing the best are hurting the most. Prayers for his friends and family. Sorry for your loss.

I'm sorry for your loss.

A woman can completely wreck a guy. My guess is it had to do with him being replaced.

So sorry for the loss of your buddy. Makes you realize how close to the edge we live at times. Make the most of each day.

There is no understanding suicide...

I lost a friend and colleague almost 4 years ago the same way. As far as I know, even his family had no idea what was going in in his mind. His son was to be married in a week and he just up and hangs himself from a tree in the woods and leaves everyone behind. I can't make sense of it even all this time later. Like Scott said, all the wondering proved a waste of time.

Grieve, help the family and take a lesson from it and live well.

Sorry to hear this news. Prayers on the way.

If he could have seen the turmoil he is leaving in his wake, he probably would not have done it.

Just remember, you were not responsible and don't start playing what if games in your head.


Szumi

Sorry to hear of your bud Squirrel. Do as Steelhead says, Don't waste your time pondering, go do for his kids.

Sorry to hear about your friend, my heart goes out to you and your family. As far as moving forward, I'd take that advice.

Sorry to hear about your friend. Prayers sent for the family and friends.

My heart goes out to you, that's a tough one.

It's something you just have to accept and move one. Do what you can for the kids and his ex as an acknowledgement of your friendship, but try not to let it hurt you too much.

Truly sorry you lost such a close friend, they are rare. You will never understand his thoughts if he didn't share them. Don't take this on, it isn't yours to carry.

His boys will be needing manly input, sounding board, and being that ear that they know and trust is very important.

Why is a crooked letter that no one has ever been able to straighten out.

Best bet is to be there for his kids and family.

Sorry for your loss.

Was there a note left? There often is.

Sorry to hear the news,
Being a good "Uncle" for the kids is about the best you could do.
If and when they're ready

I believe this is best.

Sad face

Ditto

I am truly sorry for your loss. My cousin committed suicide just before he graduated from high school. Good grades, popular, no girl, money or drug trouble....no one ever figured it out....

As others have said, be there for his kids, whether it is now, ten years from now, or both.If nothing else, they will like to have that connection with their dad...

So sorry for your loss


Always tough to lose a good pard. Even tougher in instances like these

au contraire.....







sorry for your loss.

I've never been able to really wrap my bread around suicide. It just doesn't make any sense.

I've known a few who have gone that route. At times it has made me angry, sad, confused....other times I realize we all are part timers and leaving this mortal coil soon enough. I figure it's an individual's right to go out like they see fit.

One universal is suicide is so much harder on the survivors. The guilt on loved ones can be crushing. The fact is that only he is responsible for his actions.

As mentioned, be there for his kids as much as you can be.

Sorry for your loss. As others have said, there is no answering why unless they leave notes or clues. Health issues, relationships, mental well being, they all affect people different.

SO so sorry....

My condolences. Remember the good times. Depression is a killer.

My condolences to you. Tough situation.

Unfortunately this is the bottom line.

The hardest cases to try and understand are those where the person acts completely together and as if nothing is wrong.

Take the time to grieve.
Realize that this will never make sense.

The occasional suicide among students is an occupational hazard of high school teaching Had a nephew hang himself too, no one ever really gets over it.

Sadly, we simply do not know what others struggle with. Just be assured, it is not on you. God's peace.

Sad.. So Sad.. In the 1980s I was making a payment at my regular gun shop on my .270 Ruger. The gun shop was my hangout.. I was on my way out and the beautiful girl walked in.. She was taping a checkbook on her shoulder... I spun right around on my heel. She was looking for a pistol to shoot a groundhog.. We talked and found out her soon to be husband was a Vet at the local Zoo.. She would go shooting with her father as a little girl.. They had just moved in a few months ago and now she had a groundhog problem.. Her name was Sue.. We/I talked her into a rifle,a 22mag.. She did not want the bullet to travel very far after she shot the GH.. She was stunning in her confidence and beauty.... We talked for a while.. She paid for the gun and left.. I noticed she left the receipt.. I offered to drop it by her house on my was home.. I knew where she lived.. Anyway a few days later I went to the shop and the Late Howard Lane, a Korean war vet, said "What in the hell did you do, ask her out"?? I ask wtf are you talking about.. He said Sue drove home about a mile away and killed herself as soon as she got home..... I was the last person to talk with her.. This rocked me.. A few years later I was Skeet Shooting with a shrink that became my friend.. He said once they make decision to take their life the confidence level go's thru the roof and there is no way in hell you would have seen it coming.................. This is so sad..

Keep the kids in your life !!!

I'm sorry for the loss of your friend. Make sure to take care of yourself as you go through thiws.

Though it seems incomprehensible to most of us, those that come to the conclusion that death is their only answer are usually severely depressed or ill in one way or the other.

So sorry for you and his family.

True.

Keep a watch on everyone's mental state.

Even a mild depression can trigger a chemical imbalance and there they go down the vortex.

It's usually a temporary problem that's easily corrected by serotonin-re-uptake drugs so don't allow anyone to put off treatment.

Very saddening, and another sober reminder about our individual complexities - that we can and do hide such things away in secret chambers, places where others cannot go or see. Often those secrets leave with the person - not ours to know - never were. Best to not try.

My heart goes out to you. Some above give very good advice. Do remember the best things about him and the good shared times - and try to leave the best mark through what you can do with and for those youngsters.

Well said.

This is sad and my heart goes out to you and the family.

I have had to deal with a number of suicides with students where I work. We never really know why a person with so much to live for and give, takes their own life. Some have signs that when you look back they started to act different - less contact with friends, poor finances. The thing is that you cannot punish yourself over the unknown demons that they choose to carry inside.

All best. Friends, family and time will heal the wound.

Thank your for you kindness fellas, been a rough weekend. Someone asked if there was a note, there wasn't. As someone posted earlier I am now firmly convinced that if one contemplating this could know the pain and carnage for those left behind they wouldn't do it. I have gained an entirely new perspective on this in the last couple of days.

God bless.

Be strong.

Sad news, sorry for your loss.

We will never know why.

On April 1 last year I got a text from his wife that a very good friend and neighbor had shot himself.

We didn't think it was all that funny.

Be aware that these things can be catchy. A friend, wife, or children will keep dwelling on it until they try it themselves.

Talking to friends (like here) helps, see a counselor, grieve openly, do not hold it in.

There may be an unspoken worry, health problem, money trouble which trigger it.

I have heard that "everyone" changes their mind when it is too late. (unsuccessful attempts). You don't get to see the chaos and troubles you cause.

I have experianced this a few times in my life
Its horrible
I am sorry for all

Hank

Ya know, suicide is very common, yet rarely gets the attention it deserves. I can think of several people I've known who have gone out that way. Can't think of a single person that has accidentally OD'ed, save for an aunt who drank herself to death, which is similar, I guess. Car accidents have taken a few. But by and large, suicide has gotten most of them. Hadn't really thought out the numbers until now, but they're tragic.

One of my best friends lost his oldest son to it last year. He left behind a 4 year old boy that was his world. He had been depressed over his ex and his parents talked to him just before it happened. He assured them he would never do anything crazy that because he had too much to lose with his boy. He did it later that week. I've hunted with him since he was a kid. Truly tragic and the family is still devastated.

Depression is a physical disease that can be as deadly as any cancer. It's impossible to understand until you've had depression yourself. It can be treated if caught but it's not always easy to spot. Some of the nicest people that seem happy on the outside are really struggling underneath it all. Always try to treat people, even strangers with kindness because you never really know what they're dealing with. In a dark spot it can sometimes go a long ways but sometimes like cancer there is nothing anyone can do or could have done.

Bb

fwiw & imho,
Truer words have never been spoken...

Regards, Matt.

Happens far more often than it should and knows no boundaries. Sorry for your loss.

Andy,

was your friend a military combat vet or LEO by chance?

Best said, that...

Even more tragic for the poor kids..

Its normal to ask why.... it'll never be known, he took it with him, they why part.

Follow the advice above the best you can. Be there for his ex wife and kids as they need it.

This^^^^
A very close friend of mine stepped in front of a train about 25 years ago.
Absolutely no one had a clue.

It is a very devastating event in ones life. As Seafire stated, it may haunt us for very long time.

I have a very dear friend who lost a 13 year old son 5 years ago on March 20th.

He still wonders why.

The family had a loving relationship. Their son was popular at the local middle school. Played on all of the sports teams. Got good grades at school.. etc

One Sunday night he took his life.

It had a huge effect on the local community.

I'm sure that your friend was near and dear to your heart. As others have stated, do what you can to support the family. Be a mentor to two young boys that don't understand either.

Help them grow up. Teach them how to love, how to be honest, and all the great values of a gentleman.

I'm sorry that you're having to experience this great loss in your life. I wish I was there to help you through this.

Jeff

Hey John,

No, he was neither. If he had been it would at least be a bit more understandable. My dad was a career LEO and dealt with some bad bad stuff he saw and had problems with his experiences, military combat and law enforcement are both very tough professions. PM me if you get the chance, love to catch up.

So very sorry to hear stories like this. Thoughts and prayers for you and his family. Some things cannot be explained and you can whittle your life and sanity away trying to comprehend the how and why.

Thanks, Bob. Rough weekend but I feel better today. Seeing how rough this was for me and another close mutual friend I am now thinking about how exponentially worse this is for his kids and family. A lot of pain and carnage in the aftermath.

I wasn't sure if I should post about this but I'm glad I did. Others responding about going through the same thing has been very helpful for me. Thank you.

Did you see how NORMAL people respond, as opposed to your response in another death thread.

I'm sure you don't savvy, tis a shame.

Wifeys brother hanged him self several years ago. No note, nothing to help us understand why.

+1 on Steelhead's comment.

EVERYone struggles in life, and that would include you, me, and everyone else here. Every one of us has a date with death, and to speak ill of someone who's seen that day is simply wrong---and especially among those expressing admiration and a sense of loss.

Hopefully you'll rethink this, man up, and make amends as best you can. Dig deep for the character and fortitude to do so.

Bite me, dickhead.

Trying to save face, I see. You know where to find me, you friggin' coward.

Sorry.

As a retired undertaker, I can tell you there is no reasoning why. I used to think it was love, money, or depression related, but after a work lifetime of seeing suicide, there just is no answer. The next suicide could be you; it could be me. It's completely random.

Remember the good times, and hopefully the Lord will allow us a soft boot in the A** when we meet again, for the pain he caused by this action.

It's bad form to talk about dead people like that.

Sorry for your loss , may be you can turn this to help others. I think you can prevent it specially with younger people.
there are many resources online on how to educate others to deal with problems.

This^^^^.

Squirrel, Sorry to hear of this. It is very hard for those of us who have experienced this to understand the “why” behind a suicide. What may seem unimportant in our eyes, is simply overwhelming to them. We all have different thresholds of tolerance. Our thoughts and prayers go to you and his family. memtb

Squirrel,you are truly one pathetic little boy.
You'd have to get up on a stepladder just to kiss the real man's ass that you disparaged.
If you have kids,I hope they don't see what you've done here. Now go away... Forever!!!

Squirrel - Sorry for the lose of your friend. You need to move on, help the family the best you can. In the process, try to understand that your remarks regarding the death of others was inappropriate and has come back to bite you on your ass. Get over it and learn from the experience.

Maybe your buddy was what you think Greg was and it ain't no big deal. FOAD

Had the only person that ever really understood me..........kill himself.

Dug through an Exhaustive Concordance............no condemnations found.

Took a long while to get over it.
Too long.

Is what it is...........but damn, he'd have been pissed about my wasting time over it

My buddy left, his exit logical...........kids grown.
Drive by the spot he died all the time.
Have to tell myself to not look...........about a decade later.

Strange.

Post has been re-written about a half dozen times...........guess I'm just passing along what little I think I've learned on the subject.
Stay strong...............it sucks.

Well aint this thread ironic.........

Squirrelnut: Sorry for your loss! It is a sad attribute of humanity that "we" can let our emotions/mental state/stress's lead us to ending our own lives.
Thankfully in my personal life I have only had one close relative take their own life and that happened ten years ago now.
He was my beloved cousin and ex-Navy S.E.A.L. from the Viet Nam era.
Like your friend he gave no indication of the seriousness of his troubles other than rarely mentioning his worries and misgivings about the Viet Nam war.
Needless to say his parents and sister and many other relatives felt guilt (for lack of a better description) about not perceiving his mental state.
I still feel remorse for his loss.
Sadly in my professional career over a period of 29 years I had to deal with the suicides of 13 of my co-workers (ten men and three women).
This number out of a total of 1,100 co-workers.
I attribute stress, harsh work conditions and frustration as what led to most if not all of these losses.
But who knows what finally leads our friends or loved ones to end their lives!
Again if any of us survivors would have perceived of any of these folks troubles we would have intervened and done what we could have to prevent these "losses"/tragedies.
Stay strong and do not dwell on any remorse as to what you "could have seen or done differently" - sometimes that is just NOT a possibility.
Again sorry for your loss.
Hold into the wind
VarmintGuy

Squirreljizz if I had friends like you, I'd off myself too

Teenage depression often leads to suicide or suicidal thoughts/attempts. Often times it does not manifest itself until later in life.

Attended a concert last night with my two teenagers and the lead singer took 5 minutes to discuss his depression and how he is getting through it with help of doctors and therapist. Seeing all those teenagers nodding gave me a fuller understanding of how widespread this illness is...

Yep. Do unto others.

one side note about suicide , women clean up the house and dress up before doing it. but most guys do it on impulse.
depression has a lot to do with it , but it is not the only factor. medication and education will help.

Feel for your loss. At this point just talk to his kids if you are close to them and ponder on the good memories you had together. Also, it was great to see shrapnel posting again. Maybe some relevance may come back to the conversations on this board again. Man I have grown to miss his contributions to the discussions lately. I see people are already dragging arguments from other posts into this one, this is just not the place for this now. Everyone just relax and contribute to this thread positively and I'm sure there will be plenty of opportunity to rehash old dust-ups in the near future.

My buddy was sick and gonna be gone in less than a yr, maybe 6 months.
Not all exits are out of depression.
Some are quite logical.

However............we worked for a large company. Once a large company, let's put it that way.
With the phase out/layoffs/shutdown..........our local paper quit listing causes of death.
Suicides were all too common.
Mostly management and EE types. The ME's seemed to be a tougher lot.
SWAT guy told me he cleaned a suicide gun or two........weekly.


Lots of it due to divorce, not just loss of job.

a serious subject indeed. without naming names, i've worked for three ga. tech engineers as my boss over the years. two of the three committed suicide. thankfully it was not while i was working under their domain, it was later for the both of them. the third guy was tough as nails. i won't go into details of death, what good would it do?

suicide is often described as an action of cowards. i disagree. sometimes it takes great courage, and willingness. sometimes it's carefully thought out, and planned.

often times it takes some courage to say bye-bye to this world of the living. it could be thought of in terms of trade-offs..this for that.

Indeed.

Many aren't too sure of the afterlife.
It takes guts to make the final call.

Unfortunately, many self exits are out of depression or something else........something that might prove to be temporary.

Many times it's over relationship stuff.
IMHO a woman might make a mess of things, but they would be the last damn reason to shut it down.

Spite is a good thing

It's ironic because it's 18 months old. I think people are missing the point. For the love of God, let's all move on already.

Exactly,,,we all deserve a bit of sympathy at the time of passing, and our families and friends find comfort in our kind words and memories of those that left us on earth.

Have respect for the fallen, offer kindness or just don't speak at all...it's the right thing to do.

Some end it because they feel they no longer have anything to live for,
and at the opp. end of spectrum,
some end it because the pile of burdens/responsibilities they have become too much.

as to not telling anyone or 'showing signs' .. some people are comfortable with the idea and decision.
and strictly speaking, its nobody elses business why a person does it.

some people can't flick their own switch , hence why so many people choose to drink/drug themselves
to a slow death.

Read me loud and clear, I'm not defending squrrelnuts here.

BUT, the hypocrisy of some of the guys criticizing him is laughable. What this looks to me like is silence-anyone-that-doesn't-agree-with-you-thru-character-assassination-101. Seen it many times here on the fire. Did it ever occur to you guys that maybe Greg earned squirrelnuts sentiment towards him? Or heaven forbid, squirrlenut has an opinion of his own and it doesn't agree with everyone else's.

You know the left is famous for using character assassination as a means of silencing opposition right? And we criticize them when they do it, right?

Oh, I'm reading you loud and clear.

Both of you should just STFU.

This was bumped to make a point. Astonishing how many fail to read and comprehend that simple fact.

No [bleep]....in spades.

+1 I've been wondering that since yesterday.

PS....bet they don't read these two posts either.

It has nothing to do with character assassination, this thread proves that people reached out and gave Squirrelnuts sympathy for his loss...in his time of sorrow. Not 1 poster said "fugg your buddy, the worlds better without him", no instead they offered condolences on his loss...or said nothing at all.

Sometimes silence is the more virtuous choice.

Zactly......

I certainly know why I bumped it, though I wasn't expecting the Oregonian victim to make it about her too.

You are just too stupid for words.

No, actually, I am not. You are too stupid to realize the life you're wasting being an angry azzhole is your own.

God your stupid is funny. When is your wife gonna post, we miss her.

Fireball, you are apparently so self involved that it escapes you that the criticism of Squirrelnuts on this thread is based on his failure to observe even the most rudimentary form of decorum expected among a gathering of men.

So...... the logical conclusion is that neither of you belong in the company of men.

Greg Cameron was a man.

You two are not.

It really is that simple.

To piss on a grave before it's even covered up is just bad form. It's no more difficult than that.

Yeah...now I understand why I left the fire alone for a year and a half after my dad left. Most of you need to find a good mirror and examine it thoroughly. Disgusting on all sides, but one side in particular feels morally justified in heaping vitriol....you are the broken ones. There is no moral or ethical justification for being a dick. Do you imagine you honor the memory of your friend that way? May be time for another hiatus again....

Just a different outlook on how to treat the living that's all. Some say screw the living, treat them like sheit. If I had to guess I'd say the one's with the nastiest dispositions on here were the one's that were abused as children. Plenty of alcoholics on here too that like to run their mouth. We were never in disagreement about how to treat the dead, only the living.

Did anybody that offered comfort know his buddy?

I think you missed the point. How we treat the dead, isn't about the dead.

One never knows what's going on in the mind of another. some look and say they are fine, but are suffering inside. This is indeed a sad situation.

Sorry for your loss.

It is easy to place folks who continually reply with a waste of cyberspace on IGNORE, once you do that to the folks that are an irritant like a tick, life here is more enjoyable.There are folks here who just post to see what replies they can get.

Life is too short to allow others to dictate what you do with your free time.

That would be irrelevant, comfort and condolences were offered for his loss....same with Crossfire,,,, friends here lost a true friend, offer kind words or move on. Having a few cross words with a member, certainly doesn't qualify as "knowing" him.

Either way, we all should move on and put the subject behind us...continuing just drags the issue out into the forefront and offends more people.

You've been urged before to research NPD but that has obviously fallen upon deaf ears.
One needn't be a psychotherapist to understand your torment. Safariman suffers the same affliction - it's everyone else that's messed up - not him.

Whoa

Some time well spent on a nice comfy couch, some happy pills, and some nekked olive oil wrestling with nurse ratchet might just be the ticket for fireball2🤔🤔🤔 if that dont work their is always the scramble the frontal lobe option🤔🤔🤔

What no reply yet at all???? Wtf.... put down the daffy duck Prozac pez dispenser and give us living the kindness we all deserve. Fugging PC Dr feelgood shyt..........

best advice I have heard in a long time-applies to lots of areas in life...