....especially ones that were “complicated”.

I’m 55, single, no children, net worth a little over $1M. I’ve been in a relationship with a great gal for 12 years and she would inherit the majority of my estate. I have a niece that I want to leave some money to, and there is a female friend of 40 years that I want to include in my will (current girlfriend will be pissed about that, but oh well, I’ll already be dead).

I am stumped on how to divide it up. Should I simply list percentages and leave it to them (or a separate Personal Representative) to liquidate my property to cash and then divide it?

Who has been through this process? I know I need an attorney, but I would like to have a plan before I hire one. Thanks.

Lawyer up.

Family Law, type.

You will want your wishes watertight. Anything with beneficiaries directives such as a 401k will be automatically done. Property shared in common opens another set of doors depending on the state or states involved.

Lawyer up.

This is not the place to get good advice on that issue. Get a lawyer.

Currently, girlfriend is beneficiary on the big 401k. Girlfriend is TOD on my car title. Niece is beneficiary on the Roth IRA.

Right now I have nothing covering my house & contents or my one rental house.

Thanks. I’m not asking anyone here to write a will for me - just trying to learn what has or has not worked well for others.

We have family and went with a living trust to avoid headaches and tax burdens.

Good advice above, get an attorney to write it up exactly how you wish in a nice binding legal document.

2nd vote for living trust with a non involve to administer it. Cheers NC

But it is a good place to get an idea for the kind of questions one should be asking their lawyer.

If your Niece is TOD on your car, there's a decent chance you can do the same on the house in your state.

It would be best if you just figured out what you want to do with it. Is the niece pretty close to you-- as in emotionally? How great is your relationship and same for your friend of forty years? A simple answer is thirds. But that probably isn't the right answer. Good luck, and see the lawyer-- maybe he/she can help.

Pick an attorney and put the question to him as you did in the opening post. He will give you the options available in your state and a run down of the legal advantages and disadvantages. He will likely pair you with a financial expert to help minimize any tax issues.

I did this way back in my early 20's when I was single. I was comparitively well off in assets and possessions though not necessarily cash. I am an only child and my folks were well set financially so my assets were not really needed. I had a handful of friends and relatives I wished to leave with something and the rest was to go to a charity. I laid out my wishes and my attorney laid out the options.

we recently sought out a law firm that specializes in estate planning. They walked us through every step, A to Z, Cost was about three grand.

For about $800 we had ours done. Minor complications include our Future trust for the kids and with that, details on allowances for the guardian and their family, then how to incorporate the farm trust and my folks trust

Fairly painless on our end

savage24:
Good evening to you sir, I hope that the day's been a good one for you and this finds you well.

If I may, I'd like to send a sincere tip of the hat for doing some estate planning and putting a good will in place. It's a bit of a quest with me after having friends and co-workers go through the outer edges of Hades with loved ones who've passed without one.

Honestly I believe a good will/estate plan is the most unselfish thing we can do.

Ours was fairly straight forward, but we did go through a lawyer in order to get all the details of our wills, Representation Agreement and Power of Attorney's all hammered out.

We tend to think of wills only and that we'll be gone, but the sad fact is that we may have a life event - stroke or auto accident - which means we'll be here in body but not necessarily mind - and we need to plan to that as well.

If you go to a lawyer who specializes in wills - we were recommended one and were pleased - they'll ask you the right questions as well.

One of the things we've done for our girls who will be our beneficiaries is supply a list of phone numbers, contact information and account numbers so they'll have an easier time finding the accounts and investments.

Again, kudos for planning ahead sir, hopefully that was useful and hopefully you won't need it for some time to come.

Dwayne

TOD is good but not always appropriate.
But a separate TOD account could take care of the old GF and, if done right, the current wouldn't need to know.
I wouldn't want current GF and old GF in a will together.

Figure out what you want to accomplish and see the lawyer.

If you start getting recurrent abdominal cramps, it could ethylene glycol. Coffee will mask the flavor of Prestone.

I strongly suggest a good estate lawyer, one who is well versed in setting up what you want.

L.W.

spend all you have on booze and whores. then no problems.

My parents had a living trust.
My wife an I have a living trust.

You can be charged a lot of money by an attorney that just makes mistakes.

Start reading about what an estate planning attorney does, before you hire one.

Do you anticipate a dispute between the 3 heirs that would constitute anything heavier than your wishes written out and registered? Sounds like your gal and the long time friend may be at war after your passing. Having first hand experience with that situation if your gal is that special you may want to clue all 3 in how things will go down when you do pass. The reading of a will with a surprise ending is when all the animosity comes forth and it sounds like you care for all 3 women in your life. In my opinion, which you asked for , I would get that part cleared up and would make a will a lot easier.

M

You will have to do it all over again if you ever get married.

I agree you have to have a lawyer, but you should also write a personal letter explaining your wishes. It is also a good idea to set the names in things like your 401K. A will, a letter, and intent written into things like a 401K make it clear what was intended.

Dying ain't easy. You should be prepared to list someone as your medical power of attorney and financial power of attorney. You will name an executor for your estate. A will doesn't go into effect until you die so the house or ira or whatever is subject to lawsuits or nursing home bills etc. Keep as much out of the estate as possible meaning give it to them before you die or at least make them benificary or co owner. Plan to upgrade your will yearly, this is important, chit happens, things change. We keep a handwritten letter in ours with a few personal requests that change from time to time.
Advise finding an attorney group, stay away from the 75 year old family lawyer.
Your doing all of this to make things easier for loved ones after your demise so while your at it pick out your headstone, buy a plot, and pay for your funeral.

Find a lawyer you feel comfortable with and start taking care of your will. Seems like we change - amend stuff every year.

With a net worth of a million, you need to set up a trust. Picking an executor might be the hardest part for you. We used an attorney who believes so strongly in the need for good planning that he gave the state teachers' union a special rate. We took advantage and could not be more relieved to have our wishes locked up tight. He set up a trust, wills, power of attorney, and living wills. We named our elder daughter as executor.

Go ahead and give money to the ex girlfriend now, same way with the niece. Marry the one your with, leave rest to her.

You need to talk with BMT, a Campfire member here.

He's an estate lawyer, and knows all the angles on planning a will.

I had him do a trust for me, and sure am glad I have my final wishes "in writing"

Virgil B.

We did it about three years ago, established a trust that contains our will. Met with an attorney that specializes in same. He gave us a questionnaire to complete. We completed, met with him twice to clarify some issues, and he produced a trust and will. We have a decent size estate and land in multiple states, so it’s a little more complex. In a total of two months it was done and cost $5000.

I am an estate planning attorney. PM if you'd like.to speak privately. I am not licensed in your jurisdiction so consider.it an offer of friendly advice.

We received recommendations for three estate planning attorneys from our Fidelity VP, did some research on them, interviewed them and selected one that we have been extremely pleased with. He ran us through a half day session to deeply understand our requirements, both financially and medically. He drafted the trust, reviewed it with us sorting out some details and "finalizing" it. He continually updates it as law changes and re-issues a new one every three years. He also set up a session with our three sons in attendance to explain the trust to them. We feel very comfortable with what we have done.

I'd be interested in hearing your opinion of a Ladybird Deed.

Wills are about as personal as it gets. Our first was in 75, the last about five years ago.

I read something years ago. Henry Ford running his estate from the grave.

Having gone through this with the deceased having a Trust & a Will.
Over 40 pages of directions.
Got all screwed up with the incompetent Trustee and Executor.
Judge finally ordered to them to follow wishes of deceased.
Most financial instruments have beneficiary named.
Real estate, house, personal property is where folks have problems.
Decide what you want, get a good lawyer to help you with legalities.
Name a competent executor.
They need to understand the legalities and have the time.
Good luck.

This thread hits home, I’m in almost the same boat!

I hereby bequeath my stack of herters catalogs, pickle jars, old fart hat collection and 3 barns full of rusty junk that everyone’s been on my ass for 30 years to clean up.


Don’t be that guy

First let me say that every state has different laws.
I'm single living in CA and here you really need a living trust so heirs are not tied up for years in the court system. House and bank,brokerage accounts are held in trust so that funds are available immediately to pay bills and the house can be sold. Retirement accounts and insurance have beneficiaries.

My children live 500 miles from me and have families with small children. The last thing I want to do is put more of a burden on them.

Thanks for the replies, everyone.

As a Medicaid planning tool, I presume? Also, it is worth noting some states have enhanced estate recovery statutes meaning such a technique may not be valid for its intended purpose in some jurisdictions.

When my Mom passed she had bills kept from as far back as 1981.I also took 5 loads that squatted my F-250 of clothes to the Goodwill. I bet I made 10-15 loads total to donate from the massive amount of just crap my Mom had acquired over the years. Throw your junk out people so no one else has to deal with it. If I haven't used something in the last 5 years its gone. My wife gets mad sometimes but If i dont keep on top of it she'll have the whole place full of stuff. Also all the naked pictures and [bleep] you don't want your kids to see. Put in a box and write on top DO NOT OPEN UPON MY DEATH YOU WILL BE SCARRED FOR LIFE on it. Opened a box and got a nice eyefull of a bunch of nekkid pictures of her ex boyfriend and some other things i could have lived without seeing.

Not in my case but it is one use of the Ladybird Deed that is quite usefull in the states that allow it.

The transfer on death (TOD) for titles and the pay on death (POD) for bank accounts combined with the Ladybird Deed for home and land deeds pretty much eleminater any legal squable after someone with assets dies. Too bad all states don't allow it.
A guy can do most all of that without the need of a lawyer and nothing has to go through probate.
Kinda cuts the guy making a living creating wills for people right outta the loop.

As others have said state laws vary. With that much you probably need a trust. Consult an attorney that knows your state laws.