Have you ever wondered what the difference is between Grandmothers and Grandfathers? Well, here it is:

There was this loving grandfather who always made a special effort to spend time with his son's family on weekends. Every Saturday morning he would take his 7-year-old granddaughter out for a drive in the car for some quality time -- just him and his granddaughter.

One particular Saturday, however, he had a bad cold and really didn't feel like being up at all. He knew his granddaughter always looked forward to their drives and would be disappointed. Luckily, his wife came to the rescue and said that she would take their granddaughter for the drive.

When they returned, the little girl anxiously ran upstairs to see her grandfather who was still in bed.

"Well, did you enjoy your ride with grandma?" he asked.

""Oh, yes, it was really wonderful. We didn't see a single a$$hole, blind bastard, dipshit or son of a bitch anywhere we went!"

I remember when my Grandpa's memory started to go.
It was the day I caught him urinating with the door open.

Which is not a big deal - but it's annoying when I'm trying to drive!

Grand pa is going to take his grandson fishing tomorrow so they go out to the garden to dig worms. After they get some in the can grand pa tells the kid he will give his $5.00 if he can get one of the worms back in the hole it came from. The kid thinks about it for a few minutes and then runs to the house for a can of spray starch. He sprays the worm and slides it back into the hole, grand pa gives him the $5.00.


Next morning at breakfast there is a five on the table by his plate. Grand pa says that is from Grand ma.

Funny!

LOL!

Good one!