A couple of young blonde gals in a pickup truck drove into a lumberyard. One of the blondes walked in the office and said, “We need some four-by-twos.”
The clerk said, “You mean two-by-fours, don’t you?”
The pretty little thing said, “I’ll go check,” and went back to the truck. She returned a minute later and said, “Yeah, I meant two-by-fours.”
“All right. How long do you need them?”
She paused for a minute and said, “I’d better go check.”
After a while, the cutie returned to the office and said, “A long time. We’re gonna build a house.


“My horn is full and my pouch is stocked with ball and patch. There is a new, sharp flint in my lock and my rifle and I are ready. It is sighted true and my eyes can still aim.”
Kaywoodie