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Ziggy?

Tom O' Leary....

How does one edit the previous post?



Travis

I think I schit myself

You drinking without me [bleep]?

Yes. I've been trying to put my dick in a crossbow. Not working.


Travis

Here is the one that got me axed............

Being a grandpa I can relate to stories about grandkids. This one brings a tear to my eye.
Seems this grandpa had a habit of taking his granddaughter for a ride around town every Saturday morning. She would pile in the car with him when he made his rounds to the store, auto parts, Wal-Mart and barber-shop. Well one particular Saturday morning grand-daughter came over to Poppa�s house. Where�s Poppa she asks of Nanna. He�s upstairs in bed says Nanna. She bounds up the stairs into Pappa�s bedroom and asks if they are going driving in the truck. Pappa says to her that he is terrible sick and that she should have her Nanna take her for a ride. So Nanna takes her grand-daughter for a ride. They get back in an hour or so. The little girl bounds back up the stairs to talk to her grandpa and to tell him good bye. Pappa asks her how she liked driving around with Nanna. Grand-daughter kinda smiles wistfully and says that it was kind of boring, that driving around with him was much more fun. She states, �we didn�t see one rotten low down MOFO, not one shtizhead, no kikes, no azzholes, not even one muslim goat-humper the whole time we were out�����.. It�s much more fun with you Pappa. Kinda warms the cockles of your heart.

For some reason Walterhog did not like my story.

Best

GWB

CAT TRAINING by OEH

My cat loving neighbor is not dumb, but at times is not too bright. She wanted to train her cat to stay in her
yard which is a very good thing. She made one major assumption that is generally faulty - that cats are trainable. She got a dog training shock collar and put it on her large old cat. When the cat goes where it shouldn't she thought that she would just shock it with the dog collar to train it to stay home. I didn't argue with her. She still does not know that I hate cats and came over to ask my help in setting up the collar. I helped her program the unique code in the transmitter and the collar which she appreciated. What she didn't know was that I went down and bought another identical dog shock collar transmitter and set it to match her transmitter. I waited until late at night and did the shock collar routine about twenty times. By the twentieth
pulse the cat was undoubtedly frazzled and probably had completely emptied its bladder on whatever it was near when the shock pulse came through. I stopped the shocks when a light came on in their house probably because of the racket the cat was probably making. The neighbor let her cat out the next day and tried the shock training
when it got to the edge of the yard. The cat just went nuts. The neighbor asked if she was doing anything wrong
and I assured her that it takes a week or so for the cat to catch on. That was the best week I have had in a
long time. I shocked the cat everytime it went to poop, get a drink, or eat from its dish. The cat was a total
mental case at the end of the week. I had to have my ribs taped from laughing so much.

Yes. I've been trying to put my dick in a crossbow. Not working.


Travis