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Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 10,868
Campfire Outfitter
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OP
Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 10,868 |
Forget Rednecks.
Here is what Jeff Foxworthy has to say about Canadians, during a recent appearance at Caesars in Windsor :
If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they don't work there, You may live in Canada .
If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time, You may live in Canada .
If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, You may live in Canada ..
If 'Vacation' means going anywhere south of Detroit for the weekend, You may live in Canada .
If you measure distance in hours, You may live in Canada ..
If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, You may live in Canada .
If you have switched from 'heat' to 'A/C' in the same day and back again, You may live in Canada .
If you can drive 90 km/hr through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching, You may live in Canada ..
If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both unlocked, You may live in Canada .
If you carry jumper cables in your car and your wife knows how to use them, You may live in Canada .
If you design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit, You may live in Canada .
If the speed limit on the highway is 80 km -- you're going 95 and everybody is passing you, You may live in Canada ..
If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow, You may live in Canada .
If you know all 4 seasons: Almost winter, winter, still winter, and road construction, You may live in Canada ..
If you have more miles on your snow blower than your car, You may live in Canada .
If you find -2 degrees 'a little chilly', You may live in Canada .
If you bump into someone and THEY apologize to YOU, you may live in Canada.
If you actually understand these jokes, and forward them to all your friends,
you definitely are Canadian and proud to be.
"The 375HH is the greatest level of power you can get for the investment in recoil." (JJHack)
79s and losttrail, biggest waste of air.
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Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 12,359
Campfire Outfitter
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Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 12,359 |
"...
If the speed limit on the highway is 80 km -- you're going 95 and everybody is passing you, You may live in Canada ..."
Yes, like this one!!
My wife and I saw him live a couple of times when we lived in Reno, he is a hoot and generally much less profane than many so-called standup comics these days.
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 5,611
Campfire Tracker
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Campfire Tracker
Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 5,611 |
If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow, You may live in Canada.
^^Absolutely!^^
Lotta good ones but that one grabbed me.
Also, the one about the person you bump into apologizing. If you want to get a Canadian to say, "I'm sorry," step on his foot.
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Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 69,325
Campfire Kahuna
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Campfire Kahuna
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 69,325 |
If you can drive 90 km/hr through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching, You may live in Canada .. If you have any clue as to how fast 90 km/hr is, you may live in Canada
“In a time of deceit telling the truth is a revolutionary act.”
― George Orwell
It's not over when you lose. It's over when you quit.
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Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 424
Campfire Member
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Campfire Member
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 424 |
Hey,I resemble those remarks..
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