This is attributed to Andy Rooney. Whether true or not, it's not a bad read.


As I grow in age, I value women over 40 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why:

A woman over 40 will never wake you in the middle of the night and ask, "What are you thinking?" She doesn't care what you think. If a woman over 40 doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do, and it's usually more interesting.
Women over 40 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you if they think they can get away with it. Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved. They know what it's like to be unappreciated.
Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to a woman over 40.
Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over 40 is far
sexier than her younger counterpart. Older women are forthright and honest. They'll tell you right off that you are a jerk if you are acting like one. You don't ever have to wonder where you stand with her.
Yes, we praise women over 40 for a multitude of reasons.
Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed, hot woman over 40, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year old waitress.
Ladies, I apologize. For all those men who say, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?", here's an update for you. Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage. Why? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage!

Maybe that's the problem the little sausage!

So true this is...thanks for sharing

It's my observation that women past age 40 or so tend to get excetionally pragmatic about their relationships.

The men in that age group have reached the point that they can take or leave women,... at least on a permanent basis,....and women act accordingly.

I'm not saying that us guys are perfect,... but we pay the bills,.. mow the yard,... fix the faucets,.. and women can drag us along and go wherever they want without having to worry about the goblins in the world.

Well,.... providing that they've hooked up with some old boy who has no qualms about dropping a revolver in his pocket before he heads out for the evening.

Mine is over 40, so am I.

I can't take her or leave her, she's all there is. No questions about that.

I'm far from perfect also, we both pay bills. She mows most of our 3 yards. I fix the faucets. Mine goes where ever on her own, packing a Kimber 45 the whole way, no need for me.

Can't say that I agree with anything ya say there Bristoe... but I do admit I've probably got a perfect woman.

Jeff

I dunno man,...

Mine just called me on the phone from work,... gettin' all balled up about first one thing then another.

I dunno what else to say to her.

If she don't like it here,... the place she came from is right there waitin' with open arms.

I mean,.. her ass inna way half the time anyway.

Just go on,.... I don't givva chit!

I been there before,... and fact is,... I kinda` like it!

I guess I'm gonna have to spell it out yet again,....

Yellow pants? Someone here owns yellow pants? Damn, I must be living a sheltered life - never seen a man in yellow pants around here!

Da hell is wrong with these women?!!

They hook up with ya about age 45 and think you gonna let 'em be ya momma.

,.... crazy ass women, anyway,...

Bristoe...honey.......is life treatin' ya bad???? You sound kinna mad at ta world tonight.

Nah,.... I just ain't inna mood fer no nonsense,.. as usual,....and the woman just cain't get a handle on it.

I don't know what else ta say,.... it ain't like I beat around the bush,..

I guess being a house husband ain't all it's cracked up to be...

Take it 'er don't',.....I,ll work with ya both ways.

Is there anybody easier ta get along with than that?

If they hook up with you Bristoe I don't think they would try to change you like younger women would. They would learn to live with it or move on.
Young or old they can't barbecue and will drive 10 miles on a flat.
But they know when things aren't right in a relationship and sometimes try to get their fella to come out of his cave.

I dunno,.... I've yet to try it widdout a woman around makin' a stink,.....

Without a woman around? Not sure if that kind of house husband is legal in KY, but good luck with your search....

A coworker summed it up best.

At twenty a guy wants a steady piece of arse,he's willing to get married for it.

At twenty a girl is looking for someone to support her or at least add another income,plus get her knocked up. She knows she has to put out to keep him interested.

At 30 a guy is usually sick of her [bleep] by now,but the thought of child support keeps him around.

At 30 she has the kids and knows full well she can rag his ass all she wants and chances are,he'll stick around.She doesn't have to put out much anymore either.

By the 40's he's got kids past 18yrs old,so child support is over.She's aged a bunch and he's at the peak of his earning capabilities.Which in itself is reason enough for alot of younger women to want him for sex and the hopes of money.He can finally dump her.

By her 40's the kids are gone and so is alot of her leverage.She knows she can be dumped.She has to put out again.Go to any gym,its full of 40 year old women who lost the gravy train.

A forty something divorced women always puts out,its all she has going for her.

Doctor Phil never put that in his book.

Here's what it is, man,..

"Chut up and go fix me some biscuits and gravy,..... mebbe I'll come back ta-marrah."

What the woman over 40 needs to do is turn away from the bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants... let him have his 22 year-old waitress. Then she should go flirt with the good-looking 25 year-old in the jeans and cowboy boots next to the pickup truck...

Penny

and he'll say "Can I help ya ma'am?"

Yep... It's all goooooood...

Penny

Yeah,.... that'll work,....
as long as her mouf outta range,....

Whew... that's harsh!

Penny

What do women and dog crap have in common?

The older they both get the easier they are to pickup......grin

(Sorry, heard it from Les)

Sorry I didn't make the rules.But from what I've seen it holds true.


There's a couple other age old sayings that ring true also.

"When she was twenty it looked good enough to eat. At 40 it looks good enough to eat me".

Or "At twenty,I wanted a 40 year old women.At 40 I realize I was wrong and want a twenty year old".

Sounds like you need a cold beer, something good on tv and a good place to put your feet up along with some peace and quiet!!!! I hope you get that soon...the peace and quiet that is.

Amen Kat, I'd also like a cold beer and a quiet piece.......grin

Here's hopin' you get it! (Rasin my bedtime drink to all you dudes who need a break...or peace or just a piece.(??)

Ya damned dirty bird ya, I never said that one, but in all honesty, I do prefer older women, they can at least tell ya what they like, young women, just don't know wtf they want. Les

Re: "Women over 40"

~~ A golden age when 'sanity' supplants 'vanity'.

I will be 39 in December. Im getting close to 40....and Im mean enough already according to .280. I think Id like to keep both sanity and vanity, although if I had to choose Id take sanity...I think????? LOL.

if Steelhead nails 22 year old twins in Vegas does that mean he appreciates women over 40? mathematically speaking anyway.

LOL!!! I would not even throw a guess out there as to what I think his answer to that question would be.

If Scott's fully intending on tagging some Vegas twins, my best advice is that he take a substantial amount of discretionary income. That amount will be substantially lessened if the twins are conjoined!

damn..... almost to the end of the first page and no one has mentioned WGM's mom yet..... oops....

Or, isaac's wife .... though I can't recall if she's over 40 yet....

Hunter Orange maybe...........

------------------------------------------------------

Karen just turned 40 Sean. Trey's mom still looks better than any 40 year old I've seen but I'm toning down the guy rhetoric as I think Trey might be showing his mom our posts just to make her day. At least he might be telling her about it.

Sean...you owe me a call bro'...or I'll call you later today, OK?


Sean, Jim, Trey and and others...Maybe the LSU/Florida game would be a better party!!

I think that's the best thing Rooney ever said... and mostly true!

Damn, forgot to add Brad's wife to the list.....

Bob, will do re: call. Expect it earlier rather than later.

Still no can do on the LSU/Auburn game..... work is ramping up and I'm bucking for another promotion next year..... not to mention I have to make enough in the 4th quarter to cover friggin' taxes (blood suckin' bastids....)

VA, you're too kind. I think...

My wife will be 47 in December. She's the kindest, best person I've ever known. She's funny, smart, thoughtful, a great mom to our kids and takes good care of herself. She's a studio pro that, when she sings, absolutely stops people in their tracks... she's that good. She's also plays a Gibson Guitar which goes to good taste (grin). In short, after over 22 years of marriage, were she to die tomorrow I wouldn't bother to look for a replacement... no one else would come close and it'd never be fair to anyone else for me to bother and try.

Can't misunderstand that.

Gotta 28 year old I feel the same way about. And, if she looks as good at 40+ as your wife, Bob's wife, and Trey's mom does, hey.....

Well I'm 40 and I have to admitt. I resemble that remark. Except for the wrinkles.

Just so you know Steelhead. If "I" were a divorced 40 something woman. You would still have to work prety hard to get a quiet piece out of me.........but only because I'm a screamer ...... and I do have alot going for me. LMAO

Yep, Trey's mom is hot....

I might enjoy being with a woman over 40, but the fact remains I never have been with one. Don't plan on it till I'm at least 60.....

Dude, have em show you a picture of themselves from their younger days, close your eyes and go for it. It's all good. Ain't no such thing as a bad piece, some's just better than others!

You're lack of experience in SE Alaska is showing.......

Ya, forgot the location thing..................................


You've got your tundra cows, we've got our snow cows.

The only problem with dating women over 40 for me is after a night with them I have to go home to get rest! I am 32 and have no problem dating a woman no matter what the age, 20-45 but after
35 they seem less likely to be in the games. As long as you provide you want have to worry about what your doing next weekend!

Yeah, nothing wrong with a woman over 40. They know what they want and ain't ashamed to tell you.

But I do like the line Hugh Hefner supposedly said to Barbi Benton when he first asked her out. I believe she was 18 or 19 at the time and he was in his 40's.

Barbi: "I don't know if I should go out with you. I've never dated anyone over the age of 24".

Hef: "Neither have I!"

LMAO

If the twins turn out to be 20, is that equivelent to a 40yr old?

He could technically call it that. However, their experience together can never surprass that of one 40 yr old woman.

They also know what you like and ain't ashamed to give it to you!

Penny

That was erotic!!

Penny

Long slow breaths into a paper bag Isaac.

I give SteveNO the same advice when he starts talking Jihad war stuff...............


Casey

Well, uh, gulp, uh, yeah.

Normally I'd type some witty rejoinder but my heart and imagination are both racing too fast...

River Lady and Barak's Woman, It is certainly a pleasure to have you two around here. Spice is good and both of you certainly have it!!!

Long slow breaths into a paper bag Isaac.
=========================================

OK thanks...I'd better wait till the blood flow returns though!!

SIGH!

You guys are easy... As Harrison Ford said in "Six Days Seven Nights," "How do you get a man's attention? You show up!"

Penny

Yea, but who really wants any of the old stuff......

Aged like fine wine... much better!

Penny

You better drink it fairly soon after the cork has been pulled........

"The older the violin, the sweeter the music."

Dinner plate, 1 year old doe or 10 year old doe?

Just before a women hits 40 she goes NUTS! man midlife crisis, just plain old dangerous behavior..

After 40 they settle down and get sane again.

Spot

Without a doubt the funniest thing I have read in a veddy veddy long time, thanks!

There you go. Ezackly what I've bin preachin to the dag-blag backed-up brethren for a LOOOOOooooooonnnnnnggg time... only they dasn't listen... they got they eyes fixed on them itty-bitty 20-y.o. 'twins' and can't see a gooOOOOOOoood thing when she's lookin 'em right between they beady little eyes....

(Doc doin' his best Bristoe-drinkin-KetlOne-impression)

the ones that have enough stamina to keep up with our highly erotic ways.

Don't judge us until you've tried one

I think I'd bump the age of rationality, for women, up to age 50. My girl friends are age one month to age nine, then picks up again about age 55. My real tight girl friends are age 65 and up, these gals have some experience, have learned what matters and they like sharing info about gardens and cooking. And the best part is my wife does not mind a bit.
Jim

Lets see.....I divorced at age 33 .......then married a lawyer who hooked me in with the old...."Im just a poor lil lawyer" routine at age 35 ......yep, Id say that is an accurate statement!!

That's precisely what I tell the ladies..........



Casey

Brad those were some fine sentiments directed about your wife, I can only hope she reads them in a card, or better yet hears them as pillow talk or over a cup of coffee while looking out over the mountains you share.


Well said my friend, congrats on your good fortune and the wisdom to realize it.

Women over 40 tend to be better in ALL ways...thats not an opinion its a fact...

Darn straight!!

WOW! And to think, I was dreading turning 40!! I had just about decided to stay 39 forever, my mother in law tells everyone that she is staying 39 forever!! Im not dreading 40 quite so bad now.

Nothing says sexy like a C-section scar on a 43 year old......

Generally, if you're close enough to see the scar it's not a roadblock @ that point.

Seems like when women get past 40 they aren't modest anymore, which is exactly what they should be at that age.

Like already stated, fishing with a dead herring will still get you bites.......

If you are focused on the scar, you need to look up or down......

I wouldn't trade my 40 for two 20's in a hundred years, or even one twenty for that matter. I'd trade consideration, self awareness, compassion, cooking skills, sack skills and appreciation for whiney, insecure, selfish, inept, and fickle.

So the boobies are a little softer. How's that so bad? JMO, DUtch.

I love 40ish women who try to dress like their daughters....

If'n I were married I'd be happy with whatever age she is. But I ain't married and I sure as hell don't care if the can COOK.......

Lots of that, in fact I have a 40ish woman chasing me at the moment, fortunately her daughter is her mode of transportation since her DUI...........

I dont think women in their 40's are supposed to look like, nor have the body of, a 20 year old. Time and gravity just wont let that happen. Childbirth most definately brings about battle scars. I dont mind them so bad. I have 2 great kids as a result. I wouldnt have wanted them (the scars) at the age of 20 mind you, but now at 38 its not so bad.
The flip side of that is that men in thier 40's certainly dont have the verility of a 20 year male either. Youth is meant for the 20 year olds. Its a shame that most 20 year olds dont have sense enough to know that!! Once you realize that as absolute truth...you realize that you have turned 40 and its too late.

In paradise, it seems you have a choice of a 40 or a 20. Not much in between.

Ya if you want to ignore the effects of gravity!

Sweetheart multiple orga____s are the rule, not the exception.

Spot on!

Didn't realize this would stir such a large pot. My own view of women is that, regardless of age, each is an individual and deserves to be treated as such. Age is a number only. Old is in your head. Ignorant attitudes, banality, bigotry, and other things are behaviors, which some people accept, and I choose to avoid, whether in women or men. Some of the brightest, sexiest women I have known are in their 50's and 60's, while some others are in their 20's, 30's, and 40's. Which leaves me, and others of like mind, with a whole lot of options.

Or it could be that we are just having a little fun.....

Here? On this forum?

That skill comes with age......believe me!

Who cares about a womans...........

Sweetheart multiple orga____s are the rule, not the exception.


That skill comes with age......believe me!
==================================================


Or two AA batteries!!

Practice for the twins in Vegas?

I'm well over 40 and am still not the slightest bit attracted to women my age. Going to bed with a 50 year old would be like buying used tires or going to bed with your mother..... just sick.

Well, Sophia Loren at 40 or even 50 was high quality.....stuff.

Bridget Bardot at 45 looked like a mummy.

It all depends. There's no substitute for good genetics and a good surgeon, however.

Scar or tramp stamp.... I'd take the scar.....

Im just curious what you think a 20 year old would think of you on those same terms.......being that you are old enough to be a father to a 20 year old and all........????

Just curious?????

Don't care what the 20 year old thinks, nor does she expect me to care. The 40 year old seems to think I should care what she thinks.

Older men date younger women because we can.....

Ahhhh I see...........
I personally have no desire for a 20 year old boy. I dont need another kid to raise.

Just because I'm old enough to be your daddy doesn't mean I am your daddy!

Now drop those undies so daddy can give you a spankin.

Raising ain't what I'm doing with them, so to speak.......

Yall are so bad!!!!!

Don't really know what they think, as they obviously don't think much if they go out with us old farts, and when they do get old enough to think, they're worn out anyways I'm kidding, just bugging the campfire hotties.

I've noticed the only ones that are bothered when I'm dating a girl 15 years younger than me are the miserable 40 year olds that I wouldn't consider dating......

Bein' 51,.. I can't imagine trying to relate to a woman under about 35 or so.

Women are already from another planet,... having them be from a different generation too is way too much craziness for *me*.

A happy meal and something shiny keeps them occupied longer than Nazi France, no useless conversation needed....

Yeah,... you just keep on playing with them young women.

You'll find out all about maternal instincts,... then you'll get to learn all about child support,..

I couldn't get 16 year old girls when I was 16, or 20 year old girls when I was 20. That was all about 20 years and 100 pounds ago. I just turned 38 and Mrs. Aqualung is 7 years older than I am...thank God I found her so I can say that I've filled my "doe tag".

Mrs. Aqualung teases me about the fact that there are quite a few young, attractive women with whom I work. I just tell her that I didn't have any luck with women 20 years and 100 pounds ago...what makes her think I've got *any* chance in getting any women on the side if I was interested in trying?

Aqualung

Why? I dont get that???? Why would it matter????? I am always interested to know how a relationship works out with that much age difference. Usually there is no relationship if the truth be told. Its all physical. And Im cool with that if that is what floats peoples boat. I have a friend who is a nurse who is married to a doctor who has kids older than she is. I know that has got to be weird at the family CHristmas get together. I think his ex wife is really jealous over the fact that she is young and pretty. I honestly think she married for money, and he was ok with that arrangement. Again....if that is what they want, who am I to say its right or wrong. He will be on social security soon and she will be getting a new set of boobs. It works for them though, or at least they say it does.

TFF Now that's classic and deserves another look.

Cause if she loves you, and I bet she does, she probably thinks you are the SHIZZLE and other people see you the way she does!!!

I don't get it either. To be frank, I've yet to meet a woman that ain't a little screwy right out of the gate and it only gets worse with age.

Don't plan on getting married again, so I might as well enjoy the college coeds whilst I still can, it's gotta end sometime.

Biggest issue with chicks my age is KIDS, EX-HUSBANDS, EX-IN-LAWS, and unable to be spontaneous. Sure, they all say that they WANT to have fun, but it never seems to work that way. They are unable to just roll with it, everything has to be planned.

Plus, older chicks invariably ask the SAME question that ends the relationship.

older chicks invariably ask the SAME question that ends the relationship.
========================================================

"IS it in yet'???

Nope, they always ask "What are you thinking?"

More like.."Your Done Already?"

Thanks, that one kinda made me chuckle whilst typing it....

Very nice, Bob.

Yeah, that's a deal killer, especially when the answer is, "I'm thinking it's time for you to go,"

The Ex factor certainly has to be considered thats for sure. I think having kids, especially small ones, pretty much insures that the mother has limited or no ability to be spontaneous. (Im glad mine are a little older now! It made dating much easier when I was single.) I think if men, or women for that matter, want a lifestyle that is very spontaneous without strings attached, single and young is the way to go! It wont last forever but that is ok if you are willing to pay the price associated with that lifestyle. As far as older women having a problem with that......I think too many women my age and older are too concerned with having a husband.....just for the hell of having one. I was happy with my decision to marry again when I did but it was not because my kids needed a dad or I needed money. Mabey the women who have a problem with you dating younger women would not have a problem if they stopped looking for a new last name and a diamond???.....

Bristoe,

You ARE capable of cohesive thought.

My wife is 2 years younger than me, and laughs at my "Hee-Haw", "Lawrence Welk", and other 1970's show references.

A twenty year old would just have a puzzled look on her face as she watched, "America's next Top-Model". thinking, a one-a, and a two-a, WTF?....................

That's why I have GUY friends, they appreciate the humor. Not to mention I can't think of anything I'd like to talk to a woman about other than "Can I drop you here?"

It's kinda nice to share the day verbally with a women who you love, kinda why I got married.

I understand and I ain't knocking it one bit. I'd love to share my day verbally with a woman, but ain't had much like finding a mute......

Oh, good grief, S'Head.....

HoundGirl

Don't give up Steely. I know they're out there - somewhere.

Here's hoping my soulmate is currently cooking rat over a dung fire in Cambodia.......

YUCK!!!!!!!!!!!

I suppose you want a mute with dentures.

Nope, a mute with a DeHavilland Beaver...........

Radial beaver or turbo

She's out there...

All the more reason not to renew my passport.....

I wonder if Rick can "sticky" a single post. That's one of your better liners!

She is probably working in a nail salon near you right now! I was in the nail salon bout a week ago and noticed that a new Vietnamese lady was working in there. I swear...she was eating this stuff out of a big bowl that smelled like a dead rat!!!! I was scared to ask what it was. She was literally scraping it into her mouth with chopsticks like whatever it was in there was fine cuisine.

Give me a woman that is 30+ anyday. The younger ones are too flighty and way too full of themselves (just like I used to be). A more mature (older) woman knows how to use her brain and her intellect to captivate. Looks are not as important.

Just my $2.00. Oh yeah Steelhead. Your Cambodian woman would be laughing Ti Ti. No offence intended.

Jim

A more mature (older) woman knows how to use her brain and her intellect to captivate
==================================================

If my wife thought I was having a fling with a 20 year old, she'd use her brain and intellect to emasculate,humiliate, annihilate and put me into poverty rate!!

or to irritate...........

Sounds like my wife. Know what I mean Bob.

Your wife is named Bob? That COULD be a problem..........grin

I have edited that post. Maybe I meant Roberta.

Jim

Jim...Our campfire brothers don't miss an oppurtunity, do they??

Keeps ya' on your toes. All I know about your wife is she's a lucky gal!!!

Couldn't help it.............

If it wasn't Jim, so would have I 2much!!

I don't doubt that for a second.........

After all Bob is a Lawyer. We expect that kind of thing from him.

You are one smart fellow Sir. She is lucky indeed. As is your wife........I might add.

Jim

My wife had 3 menopause's chemically induced before the age of 40. I've told her if I could live through that i can live through anything. Once a woman finds out for sure that there are no more kids coming there is a real difference in sexual habits, IMHO. Gianni

MT---I got 2 teens living away at college. They still keep coming!!!

Boy you got that right!!!......


Casey

Yup.

20 year olds are fun to look at--then they speak.......ruins it for me every time..........


Casey

Comes back to Steelys desire for a mute, or at least someone that speeks a different language.

Well, if they are 40 years old and don't have kids, there is a reason--almost invariably the normal goofiness carries with it a mean-ass self-centered streak that won't quit.........





They ALL ask the same question--you just have to date them for more than 3 months............


Casey

Dang! Now that's a possibility I would consider.........

Turbine - it's good to be able to back up with Beavers.

Women over 40...............................










They're milfilicious!

They're milfilicious
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++


You rule dude!!!

Ya couldn't have forgotten could you? Thats what they make bubblegum for.

Take that to the bank!

The thing I notice--and appreciate--about older women is that they're reliable. You can depend on them.

Some of them have pretty much figured out who they are, what they want, and where they're going; and that will save you quite a lot of grief in the long run, because A) it's pretty obvious right from the beginning whether the two of you can be happy together--either romantically or not--and B) you can depend on that not to change.

Others have not figured any of that out, and are flighty and whiny and needy and moody. However, if they haven't figured it out by that time in their lives, you can pretty much bet that they're never going to figure it out; so it's apparent right up front that there's no percentage in hooking up with 'em and hoping they'll change. They may be unpredictable, but they're reliably unpredictable. You can confidently write them off right from the very beginning--unless you're pathological enough to enjoy that sort of thing, I suppose.

I've got an older woman myself. I don't know what all she put the men before me through, but whatever it was, I landed her after she got all that out of her system; now we're both reliable enough to be comfortable together. And there's a lot to be said for comfortable: quite a bit more than there is to be said for priapic.

I was thinking something else............


What is funny is that NONE of them have anything to say that I am remotely interested in, so give me the tight body.

I'll agree with that, in general.

Family site.................................................

Ok..just finished looking up priapic. Very thoughtful, spot-on touch with the keyboards Barak!

That's good to know when one needs a loaded 12 guage in a hurry, eh?

Andy Rooney says:

As I grow in age, I value
older women most of all.
Here are just a few reasons why.

An older woman will never wake you in the
middle of the night to ask,
"What are you thinking?" She doesn't care
what you think.

An older woman knows herself well enough to be
assured in who she is, what she is, what she
wants and from whom. Few women past the age
of 50 give a damn what you might think about her.

An older single woman usually has had her fill
of "meaningful relationships" and "commitment."
The last thing she needs in her life is
another dopey, clingy, whiny, dependent lover!

Older women are dignified. They seldom have a
screaming match with you at the opera or in
the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course,
if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you
if they think they can get away with it.

Most older women cook well. They care about
cleanliness and are generous with praise, often undeserved.

An older woman has the self-assurance to introduce
you to her women friends. A younger woman with
a man will often ignore even her best friend
because she doesn't trust the guy with other women.
Older women couldn't care less.

Women get psychic as they age. You never have to
confess your sins to an older woman. They always know.

An older woman looks good wearing bright red lipstick.
This is not true of younger women or drag queens.
Once you get past a wrinkle or two, an older
woman is far sexier than her younger counterpart.
Her libido's stronger, her fear of pregnancy gone.
Her experience of lovemaking is honed and reciprocal
and she's lived long enough to know how to please
a man in ways her daughter could never dream of.
(Young men, you have something to look forward to.)

Older women are forthright and honest.
They'll tell you right off you are a jerk if you
are acting like one.

Yes, we praise older women for a multitude of
reasons. Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal.
For every stunning, smart, well-coifed babe of 70
there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants
making a fool of himself with some 22 year
old waitress.

Ladies, I apologize for all of us.

That men are genetically inferior is no secret.
Count your blessings that we die off at a far
younger age, leaving you the best part of your
lives to appreciate the exquisite woman you've
become, without the distraction of some demanding
old man clinging and whining his way into your serenity."

So you remember that one, do you?

Yup. Or when we're in a dangerous situation and I'm struggling to get us out and don't need to be distracted by feminine whimpering. Or when I really mean to do something, but both of us know I'm going to forget it. Or when she tries to be on time but both of us know she's going to be late, so neither of us has to mention it. Or whatever. Once you figure all these things out you can build your life around them.

Thank you, sir. I've experienced both priapic and comfortable, and both certainly have aspects to recommend them: but there's no real competition.

I always think of the old saw, when talk turns to "older" women, Don't swell,don't tell and grateful as hell!

Personally,.... I like women wid a job.

I've always had the gift of gab,... some may even say that I'm the consummate bullchitter. It just more or less comes with the territory of being of Irish descent with a healthy testosterone level.

I've also been fairly dedicated to the typical work ethic of those who were raised without and wanted to achieve the status of those "with".

But after it's all said and done,.... looking back,.. I can honestly say that I've improved my condition in life much more with the love letters that I've written than with the resume's that I've filled out,....

So sue me,.. eh?

If a pretty woman hasn't been schooled in the wiles of the Irish bullchitter,.. she needs to blame her momma,... not me.

Like Popeye da sailah main says,.. "I am what I am."

,.... deal widdit

Yeah,.... y'all should see summa the poems I'd write for a pretty girl after she'd introduce me ta summa that leg.

I wouldn't *even* play fair!

Women are such suckers fer poetry.

Just today my wife told me about a conversation she had with our neighbor, a good looking blond well past 40. She told my wife that the new guy on our trash collection route was eyeing her. My wife's comment to me was that she felt like saying "No, s--t, have you looked in the mirror lately"? Nice folks, too, our neighbors.

Paul

I always offer 'em Copenhagen........


Casey

All that hot young tail I used to chase back in the day is over 40 now and looking better than ever.

On the other hand, anybody know where I can trade a 50 for two 25s?

We were on the road from Fairbanks to Fort Greely one winter day, to anesthetize a cow buffalo, when the subject of my impending marriage came into the conversation.

"Don't let your pecker do your thinking for you," the grizzled USF&WS agent advised.

I'd already heard that advice many, many times, of course � but he added a touch that I'd never heard before and haven't heard since:

"When that other business is over with, you still have to listen to them broads."

"Be sure that you get," he advised, "a broad you can listen to."

That's why Steelhead is still waiting for his Cambodian mute...

Penny

That's a 23 year old Cambodian mute, with a floatplane..........

A deaf-mute couple's marital spat ended when he
(a) gestured emphatically for a moment
then
(b) turned the lights off.

okay,... okay,.. here,..

I'm kinda buzzed and in an expansive mood,... so listen to the poem I wrote for my wife shortly after we got married in a grove of hardwood trees on the Henry Clay estate. It was apparent that she was estrogenically vulnerable to such flows of verbosity,... so I felt compelled to tweak her,.. and I wrote this,... I wrote"

Antique Oaks, ancient Ashes,
Ever present in their sheltering circle,
Fall silent as we take our places beneath.

Embraced between low, maternal branches,
Comforted by a transient wind,
Blanketed with shadows,

We accept the blessings of the unseen,
And become one.

And you know,.... come what may,... she ain't evah gone get ovah that prose and that day,..

I'm home free,....

Good for you, Bristoe! All men should write poetry to their wives...

Penny

It only works if ya fresh in love.

Now all I can write is hip hop.

see?

I'll rattle off somethin offa the top o'my head fer Steve_no

Steve_no get's ta fussin,
Stirrin up noise,
Puttin down rebellion,
From alla us goys

Check out his posts,
Whaddaya see?
Not one damn word
Got validi-TEE

He say we tramps,
Trailer park crackers,
Rationale there,
Cause we ain't AIPAC'ers

Palestianan boy with nowhere ta go,
Steve-no sayin' that it's all fer show,
Layin' on the wall wid his hands own his head,
Twenty seconds later, the kid is dead.

hehehe,... I guess I'll leave it there fer now.

LOL.....lol....I sure do miss this place when I am away....

More poems, please!!

HoundGirl

The 24 campfire got it's own special pearl,
Blonde Pacific coaster calls herself the houndgirl,
Slimguy is a favorite and there's Big Emma too,
Ridin' in the Toyota is an outlet that's new.

Ain't no doubt about that she's a dog luvvin' chick,
Feeds 'em quality food ta keep theit coats good and slick,
They gather 'round her legs and they won't take no sass
Those who give her grief will get a bite on the ass.

I'll work the rest up later,...

It's late and I'm kinda buzzed

LOL....ANOTHER round for the poet....soooo laughing....you might have a future there...in poetry!!! No chit, man!

HoundGirl

I wish,... but they ain't no market fer bullshit,..

If they was I'd be Donald fuggin' Trump by now,....

Only if he does it with a 9x42 Bridgeport...

Ain't no money in poetry
That's what sets the poet free...
Well, I've had all the freedom I can stand!
Guy Clark wrote that

Water is wet
The Sky is blue
Women tell lies
Who gives a [bleep]!

Roses are red,
Violets are blue:
You think this will rhyme,
But it won't.

Amazing...lol...where some threads can go....

There is a poet in us ALL;grin:...I'll work on one and get back....

HoundGirl

Steelhead?....

I know plenty of womens that are 40 something, single (usually divoreced) many never had kids, but some have them...........
what are they? Cougars.........totally worthless except for party'n and sleeping with

what is a cougar?
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=cougar

now what I see is they prefer younger guys, but as they slip body/looks wise they get less picky

and those I know that didn't have kids, they have plenty of reason why they didn't, but the number one reason why is that they were to selfish, but they will not admit that

ok,... ok,... this been done before but it get's my mojo woiken.

I put it together back whe I was crankin' alla them hours and was beat down to hell and gone,... it don't apply real good now but I like it anyway,..

It's called "Triple 'A'

Gotta tap ya foot now,... here goes,...

Yeah, Bristoe took a bite of the "triple A",
Then he went into the bedroom to slam the hay,
He needs a nights sleep and there is no sorrow,
If he doesn't feel the need to awake tomorrow.

Workin' night shift since he was a lad,
Passin' on the world that the rest has had,
Grinnin' at you folks and flippin' the bird,
Pretendin' that he never was a part of the herd.

Well, he gonna hit the bottle like a workin' class pawn,
Starin' at the ceilin' 'till the break of dawn,
Wondrin' how it ever got to be this way,
That to get a night's sleep he needs the "triple A".

Monday looms tight with it's new beginnin',
Crankin' on the mill and continue the sinnin'
Keepin' up the energy however he can,
With alcahol, Ambien, and ativan.

The "Triple A"


*peace*

LOL....the HONESTY, man! Lovin' it....

Roses are red,
Violets are blue;
No-one gives a fook,
why should you.

Never said I was a poet....but I am still working on my big one, lol.....

HoundGirl

The disruptions of my life are now for history,
I've reached that state of bein' where it be what it be,
Bustin' ass in a factory denotes Americana,
But the Indians ain't ever gonna call it Nirvana,
So a contemporary workin' man must look for a way,
To keep a spark in his grind!
Keep collectin' his pay!
Draggin' in at 3 AM and needin' ta snooze,
Tomorrow hits it again!
There's some money to lose!
But there ain't no way to get relief by hittin' the bed,
With the racket of the workin' place still ringin' my head,
So I turn it off for 6 hours just to do it again,
With some help from my doctor and his Ambien.

,... and it ain't no sin,...

,...y'all,...

And then there's my tribute ta Britney,..

,... yeah,... she done goan crazy,... spit out a baby ot two,.. got fat,.. shaved her head,.. and word has it that she been runnin' 'round with that Paris Hilton girl flashin' her beaver all here and there,.. along with her cesarian scar,... but that don't make no difference!

She my girl,... just like Forrest Gump say,... so there,..

My girl Britney keep me up all night,
A'wearin' that stuff real high and tight,
Big white teeth shinin' through red lips,
Faded jeans squeezin' own'nem hips,
Swing 'em around then comin' up spread,
Throwin' back that pretty head,
Music blastin' out her face!
Workin' the crowd, just settin' the pace,
So keep own dreamin' but yo not me,
And Britney ain't yo des-ti-KNEE!

so hee hee,..

9.0

Nice.

Glad to see this come toward the front again.

Penny

selfish, and your point is?