This is a serious question. None of this drivel about mayo vs. miracle whip, or any of that other nonsense.

So what do you recommend for:

A) Prevention

- and -

B) Cure

Ice? Gold Bond? Cortisone? Bag Balm?

Garden hose.

Boudreauxs Butt Paste, in the diaper rash section, it works great.

LOL!

Boudreaux's Butt Paste

What the hell is swamp ass?

Never mind 🤢

Corn starch

Monkey butt !

Kingston will have pictures for any one not getting it !

Gold bond and frequent washings.

What would Jimmy Buffet do ?

The best thread of all time !

You can thank me later !

https://www.24hourcampfire.com/ubbthreads/ubbthreads.php/topics/9404384/1

Not exclusively a Florida problem.
Just ask my wife. LOL!

Bitch, go strip off 25 squares of shingles and get back with me. She is a poser

After trial and tribulation if I know beforehand I butter up with good deodorant and kill 2 birds with one stone trust me it works

^^^^this and go for a long run, then make tortillas.


mike r

Monkey butt.

Thank you VERY MUCH for the Laughs
I use Goldbond and the True Made for cows Bag Balm.
Not the fancy fangled crap they have come out with in the past couple of years
I get the Monkey Butt Powder as a joke for co workers.
It works as well as the GoldBond.


Thanks again for the Laughs

^^^^^^
Eats black taint for lunch



LMAO

I use to suffer from this affliction on a regular basis... The new and improved talic free Gold Bond cured it for me. Good stuff.

Winner winner chicken dinner.
I usually refer it to as canoe butt

Never had the problem so never needed anything to treat it.

Dont wear underware...
Been all over the fughing planet...
Went 53 days birdbathing before desert storm...
With only 2 uniforms to rotate.

Have never had swamp azz.


Joe gets swamp azz.

Medic says go free ball mode , foot powder your azz and keep it dry.

Joe stops wearing undergrundies out training or deployed.
Joe dont get swamp azz.
Joe learned his lessen.
Outer clothing will dry.
Undergrundies stay moist or wet on your skin way longer.

Makes for some interesting moments when joe gets hit and medics start scissoring or ripping clothing to get at a wound.

Have even heard joe tell docs .
Man Im freeballing ...
Doc your gonna see my junk

LOL!!!

Joe even when hit, sometimes has a sense of humor.
Morbid humour at times ,but still humor.

Depends on the level....

Level 1 : mild - Anti Money butt powder.

Level 2 : accelerated. - Red label Boudreaux butt paste.

END IT. Have to ask pharmacist for it...........

Prevention-Wash and dry daily, or twice daily if possible, especially before bed. Free ball during the day, sleep in the buff.

Treatment-A&D ointment, not the cream.

Somehow I figgered you’d be the commando type. LOL

Great responses, I’ll post up some pics in a coupla days.

Damn heat and humidity can take a toll.

Beats having a root canal though I guess.

Monkey Butt

Bathing

Freeballers4Life

Have to be careful packing a pocket pistol, makes my pants sag

Be walking around like the Norge appliance repair man.

Willy G and his “spider bites”

Staph bacteria swamp ass. Had to get his boils lanced. Nasty fugger

Corn starch is the best. Works real good to prevent crotch chaffing...

Non bathing sour milk smelling mofo.
Worse than running behind a KATUSA after a weekend of one em eating 20,000 leagues under the sea schitt and sucking down souju...
Willyg plain ole stunk....

That and the "gerd".......
And getting mud ground into every nook inside a vehicle...


Fugging simpleton inheritance baby......

LOL!!!!
Kinda.....

sik basturds.

You never left the comforts of home how could you ?

The number of desk bound, paper pushing pansies on here who think they've done more than I have is hilarious.

You yourself are hilarious . post a picture of you or your shop , some tools or just stop being a dick !

You’re a fugking pussy.

That’s Ballz Monday thru Friday .LOL

What's even funnier is you thinking I feel a need to prove anything to you or anybody else here junior. You don't mean shyt to me.

Shove it in your ass F A G. Everybody knows you love anal.

I’ll leave the anal activities to you and Jew Toot .

If you dropped a $5 bill and the wind blew it out in traffic you’d be in an accident . Broke digk

Never had it.

My job is hot n dirty.

But I dont sweat easy, am on the lean side and hit the shower as needed.

Best cure is to get in a pool.

The higher the chlorine count, the better.


LOL

Tisk tisk tisk...You boys sure have some Homosexual tendencies...

A&D ointment for prevention and extra strength Desitin for treatment.

Rubbing Alcohol

It’s hard to get swampass when you spend all day everyday spread eagle.

I'd be glad to take care of her swampass problems for her.

going commando and air conditioned seats.

If something gets raw and lights up?


Alcohol or white vinegar.

Not joking either.
Pour some in your hand, exhale, and slap it on.
You will immediately fill those lungs.
And want to kill me, slowly.
But in three or four minutes, the fire will slow to a simmer.
In ten, the area won't hurt, and that raw skin will be dry and
tough.

Yes, it hurts as bad as you are thinking.
But in minutes your problem is gone.

If diaper rash treatments don't cut it, this stuff will:

https://www.walmart.com/ip/Nupercainal-Hemorrhoidal-Topical-Analgesic-Ointment-2-Oz/46108737

It's what Preparation H dreams of being. This is the real stuff. I learned about it from my Grandpa. It not only treats baboon ass, diaper rash, etc. You can also put it on your nose if you get a bad cold and rub your nose raw with Kleenex. I've kept a tube handy for almost 50 years.

Yep, thanks Jimy.

Haven't been back there since 2018 !

Gold Bond or Monkey Butt powder does wonders.

Commando

Gotta put new exhaust on the bike tonight. Not going to be fun...

Bookmark for later. Pics to follow.

You’ve done a great job of proving you’re full of fugking schit.

Anti bacterial wipes a couple times a day and then liberal gold bond medicated powder. Change out the skivvies every day.

This one has been posted on another thread somewhere before, but it's worth a repeat. Fuggin' hilarious.

Vasoline intensive care lotion. Every night after my shower during the summer months. Instant relief and it lasts most of the day.

kwg

Try a little soap and a wash cloth... Remember Charlie Harper "Doc do these look infected?"

Just a quick update.

First, my grandma wants to thank everyone who gave their input. Especially Renegade50. She said ditching her bloomers was probably the biggest help overcoming her plight.

Second, I'm sorry but I won't be able to post up any pictures like I said I would. She says her Polaroid is out of film, and the Five-and-Dime doesn't carry it an longer.

Thanks all!

Or iodine😵‍💫

Butt butter