Who’s watched their bitch getting plowed by the neighborhood tramp?

Admit it, if you’ve played peek-a-boo through your blinds and shook you head at what a slutty dog you own.


-Slumlord









LoL

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Who’s then tried to sell off the litter of eight as pure Labradors?


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In the Walmart parking lot out of their trunk.

Knew a guy that went home with an older broad at the bar. Said they were going at it and he heard a noise in the closet. Turns out her husband was in a wheel chair and liked to hide in the closet and watch.

I asked if he kept going or ran out, he’d never give me a straight answer.

#Purebred

Lol

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What I have seen, on the way to work one morning:

Bitch in heat, mounted, 'he' had fallen over backwards and was laying on his back, 'she' was straining forward like a husky pulling a sled...........

.... all while, the rest of the neighborhood 'pack' was chewing him a new azz, 'he' was trying to fight them off, snarling and snapping while being drug across the road, on his back, feet in the air, by his di(k...........

LMFAO

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Jack, it’s to soon to hijack this interesting thread.

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PS

Your buddy probably flipped the Gilf over and tore her ass apart....How’d you like that Mr. Wheels?

I’m glad I don’t have to deal with!

I try not to be like Hotrod Lincoln and tell so many of the stories and schitt that I've lived through to the point that people think I'm full of schitt but this is a true story and for the record, I'm not a bullschitter.

I worked with a guy for about 8 years that was kinda weird anyways and very private that one day started showing me "pictures" of his old lady on his phone. She was a good looking brunette and I had never seen her before then although I had heard him talk of her. The pictures got more and more graphic as the day went on and the next day he said that she wanted a picture of ME. So I go into the bathroom and take a pic of Tommy and the boys and ask him for her number so I can text it to her which I did. The day after that he came to work and said that she wanted to have a threesome. At the time I was single and said "alright" not knowing if he was bullschitting me or not but come lunch time he asked me if I was going to go with him to do it. Turns out they were swingers. It had to look like something from a porno with two guys dressed as auto mechanics pulling up to a house with a naked chick waiting inside. I plowed his old lady and he ended up just watching 👀. Theres more to it but they ended up divorcing later on from it because he started accusing me and her of getting together when he wasn't there but thats another long story in itself.

I had a sweet and smart labradoodle that we decided to breed back to a small poodle. So at the optimum time we go to meet the male and his owner at a vet's office. The pretty vet and her comely assistant as well as the attractive male dog owner were all wearing low cut tops that day being summertime and as I held my dog's leash watching 3 sets of tits while they rubbed the male's nose in Reggie's biscuit and stroking and trying to guide Fido to the promised land.

After some time we finally had ignition and the deed was done and all three ladies got off their knees and were all smiles and congratulatory. I told them I think I need a cigarette.

They all laughed.

Good story.

We had to watch our dog like a hawk to make sure she didn't go slutting around with the neighborhood tramps. We hooked her up with another purebred and they figured things out. Now we have a bunch of pups for sale. They are 4 weeks now and super fun to watch as they're personalities are coming out. Looks like the mongers didn't get in the mix because they all look the breed.

My brother bred his lab to another akc Lab but when the pups were born one had 2 different colored eyes and looked a lot like a cow dog. Were pretty sure another dog snuck in and put a bun in an already occupied oven.

Bb

The Devils threesome, 2 hotdogs, 1 bun.
Did your balls ever touch? Asking for Gruff.

You didn't finish reading my post did you, lol

I try to help my boy knock off a piece now and again.

Lol!!
Blackjack and Sweetheart had a porno theater going on in the backyard years ago.
We had 3 litters of pups over a 2 yr timeline.
The 3 girls were all in grade school staggered out.
We had 21 total.
So it was kinda cool having the pups and the kids playing with em.

Kept the last one, Rico.
Boy... him and his dad Blackjack would go at it sometimes.
Sweetheart wouldnt take schit from either one.
They all knew not to punch Cookies buttons.
Between me and Khanarella at work we got homes for all of them.
Next door neighbor has a dog named lucy.
Lots of resemblance to sweetheart.
Think it is one of the descendants of our pups.

Hell Cookie was Railing Sweetheart in the backyard tag teaming off of Blackjack.
And Cookie was neutered.



All 3 of my daughters have dogs.

Thanksgiving and xmas at times over the years.
We have had all 7 here.
They all get along but their are individual likes and dislikes between them all.

The funniest one now is the youngest ones dog baby huey Baylor
And the middle ones border collie Hope.

Baylor 117 pds
Hope 35 pds

Hope will stand up to him inside the house when he wants to play
Outside they will play together and chase each around in who can outdo who.0

Doggie dynamics..

👍👍👍

I’ll admit, I didn’t. It started getting kind of awkward.
I apologize, I’m not from Oregon. LOL

Baylor looks tiny in this pic.
Hope the border collie.
Brady the red bone coon hound
Ole man Tucker the full size collie

None loyal to me.
Wife and daughters dogs.
My dogs are gone.




Had to build a 2ft fence extension doggy gulag to keep Baby Huey Baylor from leaping the fence when the daughter 1st got him🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️
This was about 5 months after she got him and he started putting on weight and muscle.

Good buddy in ME had a male Black lab, Baxter. He was living on waterfront of decent sized lake, bachelor. Fenced yard. On the road a lot doing sales.

Gets a call one day Baxter has been contained on private property; please come to this address and retrieve your animal.

Dog swam about 1.5 miles across open water to get to a small exclusive breeders place. Smelled that [bleep] from that far away and got there!

Best part of story - Bax was a well documented thoroughbred himself, and the breeder was so impressed they ended up PAYING my pal for the privilege of studding him out.

Sumovabitch!

Lol

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In Junior High I would walk 4 miles round trip to breed a chic named Kirsten.

Lol

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I had forgotten about it until I saw the picture of the two dogs “hung up”. As a sixth grader I was one of the dozen or so school safety patrol boys sort of like crossing guards.

My post was the farthest from the school on a busy two lane road. Sure as shooting about 100 yards up the hill toward school two dogs got hung up right in the middle of the road 😁 bringing all the traffic to a halt. Parents were honking their horns trying to get them to move. Of course the dogs were pulling in different directions so they’d move a little to the right, then the left but essentially going nowhere.

The patrol boy at the next intersection and just beyond the dogs was laughing his butt off, stomping his foot, spinning around, you name it but the dogs wouldn’t move. 😂

I think someone in one of the cars finally eased up and bumped one of the dogs trying to get by and finally the stronger dog won and moved them out of the road.

It was the talk of the school (at least among the kids) all day long. 😁

And who here has been the recipient of the offspring of such a union at Walmart? My late wife came home with one and paid some jackass $400 in the process. 🤦‍♂️ 💰

Some guy, somewhere is still telling the story about that time he got $400 for a mutt!

OMGOMGOMGOMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hahahahahaha! Outrageous!

I bred a Kirsten myself! Same age!

Where the [bleep] your from?!

Better yet,

What was her dogs name?

This could get really trippy if you’re fuggin with me

LMFAO 😂😂😂😂😂

Dude, that would be crazy ass shît, if we were banging the same Kirsten. She did love dick, so it could’ve been possible.

Fortunately, she didn’t have a dog when I was jamming her. Otherwise I’d be wondering who was getting sloppy seconds - you or me.

😝😂🦫

They travel in packs and they hit it frum the back

WuTang fa evuh!!

When I was 10 and innocent of such things our dachshund cur biotch went into heat. While she was tied up outside one morning, some tramp was having his way with her......

Chapter one of "The Birds and the Bees".....

Dad broke it up.....even though our slut biotch seem to be enjoying it......she apparently was a bit of a tramp herself......she didnt last long.

hahaha

Daughter came down to the basement and said to Dad,

Dad, I'm gonna take Ginger out for a walk.

The lil' girl was about 8 and did not know that Ginger was 'in season'.

Dad at first told her no, but daughter was insistent.

So Dad said, hold on.

He poured some gas on a rag and wiped Ginger's hind parts, then said to Daughter,

OK go ahead and walk Ginger.

It was not long before Daughter came back without Ginger.

Dad asks Daughter, where is Ginger.

Daughter said, Evidently Ginger ran out of gas and another dog is pushing her home!

ya!

GWB

OK Gdub,

got a chuckle out of me with that one.

I remember in Mexico if a dog was on the roof of the house she was put up there because she was in heat.

Local animal shelter tries to pull that scam. Every Pit they have is a "Lab mix".
Yeah, sure it is.

Our first pair of Springers ran off one very cold winter day. Many searches turned up nothing. A week later, a friend and his son were coming out of the coal mine they worked 12 miles away and found them locked up and full of porky quills. It was very rural, with only one dirt road and no homes between our home and the mine. They were smart enough to recognize the dogs and kind enough to pull the quills before they brought them to us, and they were locked up again in his front seat. Poor Rambo's nuts were scraped raw where Lucy'd dragged him around. We learned to keep her contained when she was in heat, or she'd run off again. That was back in the day when there was a Springer at the White House, so we were able to get rid of the 10 pups pretty easily.

My cousin and his wife came by our place to pick us up to go out for lunch one day. They left their kids to play with ours while we were gone.

I told him to keep his dog home because mine was in heat. He did leave it home but it found its way 3 miles to our house "looking for them."

We were eating lunch and I get a phone call from our oldest daughter who is frantically screaming that the "dogs are frozen together and they've tried everything to get them apart, including dumping hot water between them!"

Tagged a bunch of Kristen’s, Karen’s, Kate’s, Katherine’s and a Katrina.

Never knew but ONE Kirsten my whole damn life…

Several years back, driving home from work, windows rolled down, first really nice day after a long dismal run of winter weather. Pulled up behind an old well worn pickup truck at a stoplight.

Truck was driven by an elderly man with elderly woman on passenger side, 'salt-of-the-earth', wave and smile at everyone, type country folks. Four large mixed breed looking dogs in truck's bed, running from side to side , front to back, ears flopping, tongue's hanging out, excited happy to be out and getting to go for a ride.

Light turns green, off we go. Dogs even more excited to be moving, old fella driving hit top speed at 35 miles an hour in a 55 speed zone on a major 2 lane N/S U.S. highway, waving at every oncoming vehicle in other lane as more and more vehicles following have to slow down behind his. All of sudden one dog apparently became so excited and over joyed by being out it mounted one of the other dogs and commenced to humping it like there was no tomorrow.

So there we were, a line of backed up traffic following the old couple at 35 mph with a truck bed full of big dogs waving at everyone all the while dogs putting on live porn show in truck bed, the humping and waving kept up until the old couple turned off five or so miles further.

Our neighbors had a poodle named Trixie. After a short time they decided to breed her and got a purebred male, Pierre. Well, pretty soon they decide Trixie is in heat and left her unsupervised. Lo and behold she delivers a litter and they all look like out small breed mutt, Peewee. They couldn't figure it out. we laughed our asses off and helped her adopt out the pups. My grandfather took one. We all figured Pierre was gay. We knew Peewee was a breeder as he knocked up another neighbors dog.
Side note, our neighbor, Mrs. Egan was smoking hot. She taught in my school but I never had her class. We used to wait and watch her get home from school and swing her legs out of her car in school teacher skirts.

Neighbor woman who lived next farm just down the road a little ways from my uncle Bob's place had a registered female Doberman. Dog usually had free run of her place but was coming in 1st heat and woman wasn't ready to let her have pups yet and especially not mixed breed so she asked old uncle Bob how she could keep it from happening as she didn't want to keep her dog locked up in the house all day while she was at work. Uncle Bob told her to just tie her dog up in her barn. She did just that but her dog still got bred by just about every male dog within smelling distance. Told uncle Bob that tieing her dog up in the barn didn't work. Uncle Bob said the only way it wouldn't have worked is if the male dogs found some way to get to inside the barn. Neighbor woman got a puzzled look on her face and said, --- 'You mean I was supposed to close the barn doors???'