... means doing what I want when I want and not having to answer to ..... TSCHIDT! SHE'S COMING! (To be continued...)

Correct, I too am brave when my wife is not near.



ps did I mention that I am a lousy cook?

I had a long week, so I sat my butt in a chair and cracked a beer at 1 oclock. Big Head Todd and the Monsters playing. Gunna be a good day.

When I got married I told my wife I am the man of the house. She lets me.

Dude, did you score some killer weed, or what?

A man and his wife were on their honeymoon. The husband took off his pants and handed them to his wife.

“See if they fit.”

“They don’t.”

“Now you see who will wear the pants in this house.” She thought a little while, and took off her panties and asked him to try them on.

“I can’t get into these.”

“And you won’t, either, with that attitude.”

Little Johnny was trying to impress little Susie, so he was going down the list of all the cool stuff he owned. "I have a dirt bike, do you have one of those" he asked. "Yep" she said.

"I've got a .22 rifle, you got one of those" he asked. "Yep" she said. And so it went, everything he named, she had one also. So finally, in frustration he whipped out his pecker and said "How about this, ya got one of these?"

He'd one-upped her and she didn't know what to say, so she started crying and ran home.

LIttle Johnny was feeling pretty smug when about 15 minutes later little Susie came running back with a big smile on her face. "What are you so happy about" he asked.

To which she replied "I went home and told my momma what you said." Then she pulled up her dress and pointed at her crotch and said "she told me as long as I've got one of these, I can get all of those I want."

When I married 35 years ago this month, my wife & I fully understood our roles in the household as prescribed by God's Word.

Mine too! If it suits her...........

Keeper of the pussy is a mighty powerful position!

Could be worse,.....you could be a woman.

Suckin' dick and ridin' on the back of motorcycles,..

No thanks.

How long did it take you to figger that out?

Hush up and put your wife on.

The Campfire is due for another episode of "My husband is a chitbird".

Lookin back yer probly wishin you'd got smart sooner.

Us too, I decide on when we go to war and she handles the little stuff.


mike r

So this thread has nothing to do with SEC football?

I will laugh at that, since my wife's not in the room

At Heaven’s gate there’s two lines, one is for “Guys who let their wives tell ‘em what to do.” The line at that one stretches beyond the horizon.

One day St Peter comes out and there’s actually a guy standing at the “Guys who didn’t let their wives tell em what to do.” table.

“What?” says Saint Peter, “you didn’t let your wife tell you what to do?”

The guy replies “Well, she told me if I stood on that other line she’d kill me.”

One day a man asked a woman to marry him, and she said no.
And the man lived happily ever after. fishing and hunting, drinking beer and whisky, eating bacon, banging big titted broads and snorting coke off strippers asses any time he wanted. And he got to buy all the guns and motorcycles he wanted, and he never heard bitching or paid alimony or child support.

The end

This is funny. I felt like this after getting married way too young and being in a toxic relationship. Now i get to do a few of the above mentioned items and enjoy my life quite a bit.