Home Forums Hunting & Shooting Hunter's Campfire Newborn baby in the ambulance bay this morning...

So, I'm enjoying my second cup of joe this morning, perusing the innanet news and chortling over Broomstick One's email woes, when one of my nurses comes in and yells, "There's a baby being born in the ambulance bay!!!"

"Yeah, right," I said. I ain't gonna get taken in by THAT old joke again. But when the charge nurse bursts in and gives me that look, I realize it ain't a joke. So I put down my cup and walk briskly out to the ambulance bay.

Sure enough, there's a little ol' gal in the front seat of a Chevy with a squalling baby wrapped up in an old blanket in her lap. His head is wet, as is the car seat, which is a pretty good sign of a recent birth. So we scoop her onto an ER cart with the babe in her arms, and I give the kid a quick once-over as we wheel her into the ER and straight thru to the elevators for the OB department upstairs.

Kid looks and sounds great, so I head back to my desk to write up my note. Nurses are all chattering happily (nothing makes a nurse happier than a newborn baby... nothing).

So the charge nurse gets back downstairs from OB, and one of the nurses asks here, "Was it a girl or a boy?"

Charge nurse shrugs. "Dunno. I just got 'em up there. Did you see, Doc?"

"Yep," says I. "It's a boy."

"You sure?" one of the younger nurses asks.

"Well, he had a little penis," says I, holding up my pinky in imitation of a little baby dick.

"Well, that don't mean shee-it," says Charge. "I mean, look at Hillary..."

One. Two. And on three everybody cracked up. I guess everybody in my ER is plannin' on votin' for The Donald.

Ed

That got me smiling and laughing this morning, Thanks for that.

Who said Texans don't have a sense of humor?

That'd be Flave. Yep.

Love it!

Love it! Great Story.

Re the chief nurse giving you that look...

I was having breakfast in an African country with a U.S. medical doc on a short term team when a drill sergeant kind of ER nurse from the States burst in to say that a girl had been stung by a scorpion. We went out on the porch where the doc looked at the red sting spot on the girl. He nodded approval at whatever pain relief and comforting the nurse was doing and said, “We'll have to wait a few minutes to see if she reacts and goes into (?? some kind of medical term) before we know how to treat this, and he turned to go finish his last bit of breakfast. The nurse glared at him like she wanted to kill him. Inside, he took a sip of coffee, looked at me across the table and said, “I don't think I handled that well.”

Cool

Good to hear they support trump. Alice is predominately democrat

Great story Doc.

Hillary did say something about nurses, didn't she?

Yeah, they're gonna turn them into drs. Just givem a few more years, if they get the chance.

Thanks Doc.
I needed a good laugh this morning. That is a goodun. Cheers NC

good way to start the day all around,,,,

Great news!

When my son was a few months old he was in a major hospital. I left at nearly 10pm when the nurses were changing shift and cut across the ambulance bay. A brown Kingswood (Holden car, sort of famous in Australia from the '70's) came racing across and into the bay, i had to move out of the way.

As it went past I could see someone across the front passenger seat. Screeched to a halt and the driver yelled out "She's delivering"!

Nurses rushed over and a doctor came out from the ED. Next minute, screaming baby and someone yelled out "Its a girl".

A cheer went up from the crowd!

Walked into the OB suite to do a labor epidural; it was 0200, the usual night-buster for OB. At home, 20 min earlier, aroused from my much needed slumber, the OB nurse in charge said, "yep, she's 4-5 cm and is requesting an epidural".

"Ok, start the protocol and I'll be there in a twenty". Upon arrival, the young lass is writhing with excruciating low back pain. Second pregnancy--"let's check her again", says I.

"OM gosh, there's the head"

"Yep, call her PCP and I'll be in the surgery lounge waiting in case he needs anything".

Multiply this times 1-0-0 times over a thirty + year career of interrupted sleep. I really didn't mind and was always happy with pink, flailing arms and legs and a robust cry without any attendant intervention.

And those are the ones beside those who did get epidurals or emergent c-sections which was another 1-0-0 times the number above above.

All in the rear view mirror now and though it had its gratifications, I miss it about like a case of chronic hemorrhoids.

Sheeeitt!!!


Unless it is an enormous clit, ....
Boy!