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Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 73,096
Campfire Kahuna
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OP
Campfire Kahuna
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 73,096 |
their castle in Transylvania talking about how they were tired of the local food. Both of them were of the opinion that Italian food would be a nice change.
So, they changed into bats and winged there way over to Italy. They set themselves down in Venice and went looking for their dinner. Soon, they found a nice dark bridge over a canal to have their meal. They hunkered down and waited. In no time, an Italian couple came floating down the waterway. As they passed under the bridge, the vampires grabbed them, sucked them dry and tossed them into the water.
As they licked their lips, they discussed how good Italian food was and they both decided it was so good that they wanted seconds. Again, they hid and waited. As before another young Italian couple came floating down the canal. Also as before, the vampires grabbed them, sucked every drop of blood from their bodies and tossed them over the side of the bridge.
Now, the vampires were feeling pretty full, but they decided to make it a really special night and to have some dessert. Waiting in the dark, they soon spied another couple approaching their bridge. When they got there, this couple also found themselves subdued and their bodies sucked dry. The vampires then tossed the dead couple into the canal. Satiated, the vampires prepared to change form and fly home before they were caught by the coming dawn.
They stopped however, when they heard singing. Not wanting to be seen, they searched for the source.
A quick glance proved that they were the only ones on the bridge. The sound however was coming from the canal.
Slowly they approached the rail and looked over. Sure enough there in the water they spied an alligator. He was munching on the bodies singing,
"Drained wops keep falling on my head..."
George Orwell was a Prophet, not a novelist. Read 1984 and then look around you!
Old cat turd!
"Some men just need killing." ~ Clay Allison.
I am too old to fight but I can still pull a trigger. ~ Me
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Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 28,854
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 28,854 |
"Only Christ is the fullness of God's revelation." Everyday Hunter
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Joined: Aug 2015
Posts: 13,234
Campfire Outfitter
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Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Aug 2015
Posts: 13,234 |
Let's Go Brandon! FJB
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Joined: May 2004
Posts: 56,101
Campfire Kahuna
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Campfire Kahuna
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 56,101 |
I am..........disturbed.
Concerning the difference between man and the jackass: some observers hold that there isn't any. But this wrongs the jackass. -Twain
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Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 32,130
Campfire 'Bwana
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Campfire 'Bwana
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 32,130 |
If you put Taco Bell sauce in your ramen noodles it tastes just like poverty
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Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 27,692
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 27,692 |
Member: Clan of the Turdlike People.
Courage is Fear that has said its Prayers
�If we ever forget that we are one nation under God, then we will be a nation gone under.� Ronald Reagan.
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Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 15,654
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 15,654 |
NRA Life,Endowment,Patron or Benefactor since '72.
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Joined: Oct 2011
Posts: 59,055
Campfire Kahuna
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Campfire Kahuna
Joined: Oct 2011
Posts: 59,055 |
Paul
"I'd rather see a sermon than hear a sermon".... D.A.D.
Trump Won!, Sandmann Won!, Rittenhouse Won!, Suck it Liberal Fuuktards.
molɔ̀ːn labé skýla
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Joined: Oct 2016
Posts: 8,109
Campfire Outfitter
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Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Oct 2016
Posts: 8,109 |
Lol... that was PUN-ishing.
An unemployed Jester, is nobody's Fool.
the only real difference between a good tracker and a bad tracker, is observation. all the same data is present for both. The rest, is understanding what you're seeing.
~Molɔ̀ːn Labé Skýla~
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Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 17,733
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 17,733 |
NRA LIFE MEMBER GOD BLESS OUR TROOPS ESPECIALLY THE SNIPERS! "Suppose you were an idiot And suppose you were a member of Congress... But I repeat myself." -Mark Twain
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Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 38,864
Campfire 'Bwana
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Campfire 'Bwana
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 38,864 |
Oh, no! Not an insult to the Italians!
Not a real member - just an ordinary guy who appreciates being able to hang around and say something once in awhile.
Happily Trapped In the Past (Thanks, Joe)
Not only a less than minimally educated person, but stupid and out of touch as well.
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Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 19,495
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 19,495 |
Retired cat herder.
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Joined: May 2003
Posts: 13,365
Campfire Outfitter
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Campfire Outfitter
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 13,365 |
Well, how about this one. Students in an advanced Biology class were taking their mid-term exam. The last question was, 'Name seven advantages of Mother's Milk.' The question was worth 70 points or none at all. One student was hard put to think of seven advantages. He wrote: 1) It is perfect formula for the child. 2) It provides immunity against several diseases. 3) It is always the right temperature. 4) It is inexpensive. 5) It bonds the child to mother and vice versa. 6) It is always available as needed. And then the student was stuck. Finally, in desperation, just before the bell rang indicating the end of the test he wrote: 7) It comes in two attractive containers and it's high enough off the ground where the cat can't get it. L.W.
"Always go straight forward, and if you meet the devil, cut him in two and go between the pieces." (William Sturgis, clipper ship captain, 1830s.)
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Joined: Nov 2013
Posts: 28,755
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Nov 2013
Posts: 28,755 |
The first one made me groan.
Yours made me laugh so hard that the shaking bed woke up the wife.
What fresh Hell is this?
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Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 6,798
Campfire Tracker
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Campfire Tracker
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 6,798 |
OMG T LEE, had to wipe coffee off the computer screen!
Last edited by maddog; 12/04/16.
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Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 151,203
Campfire Savant
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Campfire Savant
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 151,203 |
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Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 73,096
Campfire Kahuna
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OP
Campfire Kahuna
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 73,096 |
George Orwell was a Prophet, not a novelist. Read 1984 and then look around you!
Old cat turd!
"Some men just need killing." ~ Clay Allison.
I am too old to fight but I can still pull a trigger. ~ Me
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Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 73,096
Campfire Kahuna
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OP
Campfire Kahuna
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 73,096 |
One of the best pun-jokes I have come across in a long time.
George Orwell was a Prophet, not a novelist. Read 1984 and then look around you!
Old cat turd!
"Some men just need killing." ~ Clay Allison.
I am too old to fight but I can still pull a trigger. ~ Me
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Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 975
Campfire Regular
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Campfire Regular
Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 975 |
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Joined: Feb 2006
Posts: 8,639
Campfire Outfitter
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Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Feb 2006
Posts: 8,639 |
Groan!
Speak softly and use a big bore... Where's El Cid when we need him...
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