Home Forums Hunting & Shooting Hunter's Campfire Friends vs Acquaintances

I WILL SECOND THE MOTION.

Not very many friends in my circle. Lots and lots of acquaintances.

Working hard to teach my kids that a real friend is rare and you can't expect to make but just a few in your early life (school years). You don't need a circle of 20 people, because of those 20, 18 generally enjoy others' failure and misery to make themselves feel better/bigger.

I have a large circle of people that I am acquainted with. Many of who have extremely different political and social views than I. I could care less as long as they don't feel the need to push their beliefs on me. Some of these people I would go to great lengths to help because they are truly good people have have done good for me and mine (coaches mainly) even though they support things totally antithetical to what I believe.

Those with different views can still have the greater understanding you seek..and through that one can sometimes
still learn something valuable, despite personal differences.

Other peoples views don't necessarily bring strife lest some try to force their view onto another.

I found life improved with less 'friends'....but everybody is different.

Yes. Friends are friends for a variety of reasons and life is considerably more interesting if we disagree on a variety of issues.

The OP must have very little in the way of exchanges with his associates. They can simply sit in silence and perhaps nod to one another once in a while. If I lived that way, I'd have to dump my wife. Ain't going to happen.

It's especially entertaining when a varied group can sit around a fire in the evening, and we each know how to push one another's buttons. Just a 5 word comment can generate an hours worth of entertainment.

I base my friendships on shared values, not political or religious beliefs.
I have some acquaintances with liberal leaning tendencies but not "extreme, the world is ending because Hillary lost" types. The same applies to far right.
All those that I remain friends with have very similar values when it comes to business, parenting and treating people correctly.
True "friends" are rare. Some define it as someone that will be there for you no matter what. I try to allow for their own needs as well. When the oxygen mask drops in the plane you need to put your own on before helping someone else. If they aren't squared away how can they help you.
When I was a young man growing up I had a few mentors, one I remember very well, he told me if when I am on my deathbed and I can say I have had 5 true friends I have done well in life.
His definition of of "true friend" was
some you could call at 3 AM and say "I'm at the corner of 1st street and Main" and before you can define the problem
the phone goes dead (pretty sure it was a pay phone then)
A true friend will show up in minutes, not knowing the problem he will have a gun, a condom and $500 bail money.

Evidently we differ from one another in the actual definition of 'friend' and 'acquaintance'.
That's all well and good, but it's a bit off putting for some to puff up with righteousness and to pontificate that their definition is better than someone else's.
Personally I have a lot of friends, and an awful lot of acquaintances. I am in close touch with folks from elementary school, through high school, college, and adult life. I like people, and I put a lot of time and effort into keeping friendships intact.
Shrug, that said, I don't spend much time with anyone, friend or family, that is a far lefty, or that believes in, or supports an agenda or world view that I differ from.

Some guys seem to need to be involved with many other folks in order to be happy/satisfied, some seem to be happy (and less hassled) by having just a few, and some seem to want/need almost none. And, as someone already said, the definition of "friend" may vary and complicate this discussion quite a bit.

Looks like the needs/wants for having some other persons close/steady in one's life, and the criteria for what is a "friend", are pivots here.

For certain, in my experience, true friendship is a two-way deal - a deliberate joining of kindred values and spirits.

I try to teach youngsters that as you get older your friends become less but the bonds become stronger. They don't get it because they are all trying to be each other's friends. What they don't understand is those so-called friends are not friends at all.

Another definition of a friend versus true friend- a friend will be there to get you out of jail. A true friend will be sitting next to you in jail.

I think best friends that stay mutually active in your life do become few and far between as you age. I also think we don't seek out friendships like we do when we are younger and family once again becomes a priority and limits us from doing so.

A true friend would talk you out of stupid choices, and if you don't listen will say, "I told you so." If you're sitting in jail because of following someone elses actions or vice versa, I wouldn't call it a friendship as much as I would call it two dumbasses that deserve each other.

Do you really mean to say that people who outrank you matter, and people who don't outrank you don't matter?

DINK needs a group cyber hug.

He Dink, are you Italian?

I doubt that DINK and the OP are as hardcore iconoclastic as they might sound.

Additionally, this topic isn't the best one to discuss in the middle of January, when cabin fever and foul moods hit especially hard.

DINK's work puts him dealing with the dreggs of society. Easy to become cynical. jus sayin.

Just strangers around the 'fire.

Sounds a little insecure and unhappy to me.

I agree!!

My categories:

Family:
by blood or not. Someone I can call at anytime and they're there for me period, no questions asked. We can see each other all of the time or maybe from time to time. I've got lots of "blood" relatives that I don't consider to be family (sadly, including my sister and parents).
Example, my best bud for the past 35 yrs. I consider him as my brother, not just a friend. He lives in another town, so I don't get to see him as often as I'd like. But, there's been times where I've broken down in the middle of nowhere and he was on his way (or me heading to help him). Heck, I'm helping him with his parent's 50th wedding anniversary this upcoming weekend. But, I also consider them as family, especially since most of my summers were either at his house or my grandparents.

Friends:
people I get along with, watch a game with, generally know their immediate family members (spouse, kids, etc). Maybe go eat dinner from time to time. We may or may not agree on everything, but most things in general.

Acquaintance:
Someone I run into from time-to-time. Could be someone I have things in common with or not. Generally someone that I would shake their hand, be friendly with etc, but not ever ask them over to watch the game or hang out.

Interesting discussion. After some reflection I'd say that while most of my friends share a common mindset, I have a few that are coming somewhere between mid and left field. My life wouldn't be nearly as rich if I didn't have friendships with those people. Conversely I know people that seem the have the same mindset as me, and I can't stand them.

I figure the reason I can handle friendships with people that have differing points of view is that I have solid confidence in how I view things and being around others with a different view isn't necessary for me to feel secure. There's no better way to strengthen your view on a subject than discussing it with someone you can respectfully disagree with.

Now fools, zealots, fence sitters and the week minded are just a waste of time.

Rarely do I discuss meaningful subjects with co-workers, and I can get along with most anyone in the workplace. I can deal with those I don't agree with, especially if they're the ones cutting the check. While few of my co-workers have become friends, I've found that a friendly relationship with supervisors, co-workers and clients tends to get you further than being an a-hole. The few times I've been an a-hole it's come back to bite me one way or another.

This!