Home Forums Hunting & Shooting Hunter's Campfire I'm in a place that I've never been in before

Every man is invincible , until his Dad dies, Then he realizes that if that man can die, so the hell can I. You are wiser now.

First off, my condolences. I've often had this thought and fear. I still have my mom around and it was a hell of a change when my dad died. I remember him saying that my brother and I wouldn't truly be men until he was gone. Amazing how much you can miss a parent that was an abusive piece of shìt and still wish that you could show them what you've done with your life.

Maybe a person replaces those gone in their life with new relationships of their own kids, grand kids, etc.. I don't know.

I am so sorry for your loss. It's tough. I lost my Dad 2 years ago today and my Mom back in June. You are a young man to have lost them. I'm 64. Yep, we're the oldest in the family now. Does that mean we suddenly became wise and have al the answers? Nope. You will always miss him. I wake up about 4 days a week thinking I need to call and check on mine. I did it for so long it's habit I guess. I hope the Good Lord comforts you and the rest of the family. My prayers going up for that.
Take care,
Rick

Wth? Who stole your phone?

So sorry about your dad, Mike. May he RIP.

You and I are close in age and while my dad is in good health I feel like I would have the same thoughts you are having if it were my turn to walk through it.

Lots of men with wisdom well beyond me offering good perspective so I’ll just say I’m sorry and thanks to the rest of you for your advice.

Sorry for your loss brother . It doesn’t get any easier as time goes on.
I was 39 when I lost my dad. 41 when I lost mom. Loosing Mom still hurts to this day. The first year or two AtI had lots of regrets for not spending more time with her and just internal emotional roller coaster.
Cleaning your parents house and deciding what to do with their belongings really sucks. Just Take it one day at a time. Hopefully your dad had a will or something set up so you and your siblings don’t get into over it over $
One again, sorry for your loss man.

My Dad died at 75 in 2019. It's tough sometimes. I found a briar patch thick with bunnies, wish I could still get him out there while I tromped around. But the thing was, he hadn't been able to hunt for years because of illness. He really wished he had died years earlier instead of being sick for so long. It's sad but that's what God has for you. Like others have said, 49 is a good long time to have your dad, be thankful for that.

I tried to call Dad a lot but he wouldn't answer or would just pass his phone to Mom. I still call Mom every day. I know I'll never miss that time I spend talking to her.

I agree

Mike,

Am very sorry to hear that.

My own father died at 44, when I was 16. My mother lived twice as long, and at her service in Boise, my friend and fellow writer Brian Pierce attended. He'd recently become an orphan too, at 60, and commented that we really don't become adults until both our parents are gone. Which can indeed be hard...

Best wishes,
John

When put in that situation all we can do is the best we know how.

When my Dad died i was not able to be there before he went and for years it has pained me but i figure he would know that i would carry on the best i could,once i came to believe that things got a bit easier.

Give it time.

Right there with ya amigo,first xmas without my parents.Im a rookie in this dept so all of these wise words hit home.One day at a time and the path is traveled by many.Prayer and time heal all.

Same exact thing happened to me just last year. Reach out to me if you want.

Having to take the reigns is always difficult. We all go through it. Easy? No! Nessary? Yes! For your family. You will be fine. Breath, put one foot in front of the other. There are things to be dealt with. You are strong and can weather this storm. MTG

My father died when I was in my late 40’s. I felt a great weight lifted from my shoulders. I envy those of you who miss your dads. I miss my FIL who died 2 years ago, he was a good guy as was his father. They gave me many good opportunities when I was a kid. My MIL is the only one left of that generation, but she’s only a few years older than I so not really a parental relationship.

Sorry for your loss. You're next.

moosemike, what I do is reflect on memories of my father, mother, grandparents and aunts and uncles. This is a way for me to stay connected to them always. Maybe sometimes this helps with decisions or other struggles I face and receive some sort of guidance.

I have a larger portrait of my mom and dad. When my kids became old enough and expressed regret that they would never know grandpa and grandma I told them that perhaps grandpa and grandma could see them through my eyes, and that they were pleased.

We had this talk while looking at the portrait.

Mike, maybe your father can feel and understand your grief and will give comfort to you, and guidance.

There is truth here.

You have my condolences. Wish I had really far reaching advice. But Dad left us in 1974. Can tell you I still miss him. Mom as well. Both were better to me than I deserved. I'm trying to be the best I can to guide the kids, grands, and great grands. I hope the Lord grants me enough days and sufficient health to be there for them all. I hope for all the best, for you. Be Well, RZ.

I know exactly what you're saying. My Dad wasn't a nice guy. He didn't have many friends and most people didn't like him. My mom was a Saint in comparison. But still, he was all I had left and I feel the void

It certainly has helped to read the kind words here. Thanks again