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Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 18,005
Campfire Ranger
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OP
Campfire Ranger
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 18,005 |
I have never been lost while bird-hunting. Even in the deepest forests chasing ruffed grouse, the most impenetrable swamps chasing ducks or woodcock, in blinding snowstorms or packing decoys out in pitch-black darkness, I never get lost. I never carry a compass or a GPS, either. They can break, whereas my method is unbreakable and flawless. It works like this: when I realize I have no idea where I am or where the truck is, I simply raise my shotgun, fire a pair of shots into the air, and loudly declaim, "How in the world did I miss that shot?" Within seconds three bird hunters will appear to give me their opinions on how I missed the shot. One of them invariably knows the way back to the truck. 
"I'm gonna have to science the schit out of this." Mark Watney, Sol 59, Mars
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Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 39,301
Campfire 'Bwana
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Campfire 'Bwana
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 39,301 |
I carry three collapsible survey stakes. When I get lost I just pound them into the round in a straight line and stand back. A dump truck will come by and drive over then within five minutes. I just hitch a ride out of the woods with him.
The first time I shot myself in the head...
Meniere's Sucks Big Time!!!
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Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 14
New Member
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New Member
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 14 |
I will sit down an practice "self gratification", someone will always catch me, or I will follow a possum, they will go to the blacktop and get run over
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Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 20,379
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 20,379 |
If I'm lost about three miles in, I'll find and follow a fresh set of tracks.
They will always go right past where I parked my truck.
I replace valve cover gaskets every 50K, if they don't need them sooner...
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Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 18,005
Campfire Ranger
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OP
Campfire Ranger
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 18,005 |
That's a good one, Scott! Not nearly as personally embarassing as my method...
"I'm gonna have to science the schit out of this." Mark Watney, Sol 59, Mars
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Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 7,944
Campfire Outfitter
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Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 7,944 |
Just say quietly, under your breath, immediately after shooting, "Oh crap, was that a WOLF??!". A few dozen WIDNR wardens and Federal Bunny Cops will have the CSI, Wolf Sucker strike team escort you to your vehicle, which they will then confiscate, along with your gun and any change you have in your pockets, with a high level of righteous indignation!  The moral of the story is, remember that third "S". 
"The Bigger the Government, the Smaller the Citizen" - Dennis Prager LINK
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Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 73,096
Campfire Kahuna
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Campfire Kahuna
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 73,096 |
All ![[Linked Image]](http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v133/TLEEF/SMILIES/LOL-1.gif)
George Orwell was a Prophet, not a novelist. Read 1984 and then look around you!
Old cat turd!
"Some men just need killing." ~ Clay Allison.
I am too old to fight but I can still pull a trigger. ~ Me
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Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 52,680
Campfire Kahuna
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Campfire Kahuna
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 52,680 |
I just follow my hunting buddies...  Hunting Buddies
Last edited by eh76; 01/22/12.
Liberalism is a mental disorder that leads to social disease.
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Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 14,074
Campfire Outfitter
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Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 14,074 |
I just settle down, relax, and wait for a friend to show up and ask if I can help them move since I have a pickup.... I sure hope their stuff gets tied down properly!!!  ![[Linked Image]](http://www.duckshit.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/05/man-lying-mattress-pickup.jpg)
Biden's most truthful quote ever came during his first press conference, 03/25/21.
Drum roll please...... "I don't know, to be clear." and THAT is one promise he's kept!!!
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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 16,740
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 16,740 |
Carry a deck of cards. If you get lost sit down and play solitaire. Sooner or later someone will come along and tell you to play the red jack on the black queen.
A government is the most dangerous threat to man�s rights: it holds a legal monopoly on the use of physical force against legally disarmed victims.
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Joined: Mar 2011
Posts: 33,856
Campfire 'Bwana
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Campfire 'Bwana
Joined: Mar 2011
Posts: 33,856 |
EH, I've got great hunting and the beer is free. Get your buddies and come on down.
The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time by the blood of patriots and tyrants.
If being stupid allows me to believe in Him, I'd wish to be a retard. Eisenhower and G Washington should be good company.
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Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 3,867
Campfire Tracker
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Campfire Tracker
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 3,867 |
Good god, I would get lost
�The constitution of the United States asserts that all power is inherent in the people, that they may exercise it by themselves, that it is their right and duty to be at all times armed!� � Thomas Jefferson
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Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 2,054
Campfire Regular
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Campfire Regular
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 2,054 |
If lost I just ask my lab if he's ready to go home and eat. He'll find the truck in record time.
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Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 170
Campfire Member
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Campfire Member
Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 170 |
I carry three collapsible survey stakes. When I get lost I just pound them into the round in a straight line and stand back. A dump truck will come by and drive over then within five minutes. I just hitch a ride out of the woods with him. Ain't that the truth. Lee
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Key:
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