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Joined: Feb 2001
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Campfire Kahuna
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OP
Campfire Kahuna
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 73,096 |
A sexually active middle aged woman informed her plastic surgeon that she wanted her vaginal lips reduced in size because, over the years, they had become loose and floppy. Out of embarrassment, she insisted that the surgery be kept secret and, of course, the surgeon agreed.
Awakening from the anesthesia, she found three beautiful red roses carefully placed beside her on the bed. Outraged, she immediately called in the surgeon. "I thought I specifically asked you not to tell anyone about my operation!"
The surgeon told her he had carried out her wish for confidentiality and that the first rose was from him.
"I felt so sad for you, because you went through this all by yourself. The second rose is from my nurse. She assisted me in the surgery and understood perfectly, as she had the same procedure done some time ago."
"And what about the third rose?" she asked.
"That's from a man in the burn unit; he wanted to thank you for his new ears."
George Orwell was a Prophet, not a novelist. Read 1984 and then look around you!
Old cat turd!
"Some men just need killing." ~ Clay Allison.
I am too old to fight but I can still pull a trigger. ~ Me
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Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 27,692
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 27,692 |
Member: Clan of the Turdlike People.
Courage is Fear that has said its Prayers
�If we ever forget that we are one nation under God, then we will be a nation gone under.� Ronald Reagan.
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Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 54,842
Campfire Kahuna
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Campfire Kahuna
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 54,842 |
Back in the heartland, Thank God!
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Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 21,702 Likes: 3
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 21,702 Likes: 3 |
Mr, you have the sexiest ears....
"The number one problem with America is, a whole lot of people need shot, and nobody is shooting them."
-Master Chief Hershel Davis
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Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 34,261
Campfire 'Bwana
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Campfire 'Bwana
Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 34,261 |
Terry, are you taking lessons from Les!!!!! 
Don't vote knothead, it only encourages them. Anonymous
"Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups." Anonymous
"Self-reliance, free thinking, and wealth is anathema to both the power of the State and the Church." Derby Dude
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Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 31
Campfire Greenhorn
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Campfire Greenhorn
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 31 |
you are some sick mother fawkers!!!!!!!
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Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 73,096
Campfire Kahuna
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OP
Campfire Kahuna
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 73,096 |
George Orwell was a Prophet, not a novelist. Read 1984 and then look around you!
Old cat turd!
"Some men just need killing." ~ Clay Allison.
I am too old to fight but I can still pull a trigger. ~ Me
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Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 32,044
Campfire 'Bwana
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Campfire 'Bwana
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 32,044 |
He will look funny with a Tampax sticking out of each ear.
A Doe walks out of the woods today and says, that is the last time I'm going to do that for Two Bucks.
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Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 31
Campfire Greenhorn
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Campfire Greenhorn
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 31 |
let's put some of that swinging dick thinking into something more intellectual .... can't believe some of you short-dick thinkers continue to disrespect women!!!!!!!!!!!!! shame on you, no, piss on you!
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Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 73,096
Campfire Kahuna
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OP
Campfire Kahuna
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 73,096 |
I did not dis anybody Sir.
It is a joke son, I say a joke.
George Orwell was a Prophet, not a novelist. Read 1984 and then look around you!
Old cat turd!
"Some men just need killing." ~ Clay Allison.
I am too old to fight but I can still pull a trigger. ~ Me
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Joined: Jul 2008
Posts: 4,867
Campfire Tracker
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Campfire Tracker
Joined: Jul 2008
Posts: 4,867 |
THAT was funny. let's put some of that swinging dick thinking into something more intellectual .... can't believe some of you short-dick thinkers continue to disrespect women!!!!!!!!!!!!! shame on you, no, piss on you! With language like that, hard to believe you're anything but some sour puss's sock puppet. That, or need your testosterone level checked; it's ok, it's 2012, we got cream for that.
Last edited by sandcritter; 02/01/12.
Golldammed motion detector lights. A guy can’t even piss off his porch in peace any more.
"Look, I want to help the helpless. It's the clueless I don't give a [bleep] about." - Dennis Miller on obamacare.
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Campfire Greenhorn
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Campfire Greenhorn
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Posts: 46,296 Likes: 6
Campfire 'Bwana
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Campfire 'Bwana
Joined: Sep 2009
Posts: 46,296 Likes: 6 |
That was funny as hell, can i use that Mr. Lee? Gunner
Trump Won!
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Posts: 4,327
Campfire Tracker
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Campfire Tracker
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 4,327 |
Terry,
Your story was a thing of beauty.
Could not have possibly thought of it myself.
Glad you did.
Steve
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Joined: Jan 2012
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Campfire Greenhorn
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Campfire Greenhorn
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Campfire Tracker
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Campfire Tracker
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 5,838 Likes: 1 |
TLEE, sir you are a very bad man! Thanks for the laugh.
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Campfire Regular
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Campfire Regular
Joined: May 2005
Posts: 1,880 |
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Posts: 802
Campfire Regular
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Campfire Regular
Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 802 |
My wife even thought it was funny...... and gross
"Papa ! Nana made turtles in the potty !"
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Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 73,096
Campfire Kahuna
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OP
Campfire Kahuna
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 73,096 |
That was funny as hell, can i use that Mr. Lee? Gunner All stuff put up here is usable as you see fit AFAIC.
George Orwell was a Prophet, not a novelist. Read 1984 and then look around you!
Old cat turd!
"Some men just need killing." ~ Clay Allison.
I am too old to fight but I can still pull a trigger. ~ Me
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Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 39,411 Likes: 66
Campfire 'Bwana
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Campfire 'Bwana
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 39,411 Likes: 66 |
Wonder what everyone will think when his ears start "sweating"....
Me
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