Home Forums Hunting & Shooting Hunter's Campfire 7 degrees od Blonde

Some are old, some are new.








FIRST DEGREE
A married couple was asleep when the phone rang at 2 in the morning. The very blonde wife picked up the phone, listened a moment, and said 'How should I know, that's 200 miles from here!' and hung up. The husband said, 'Who was that?'

The wife answered, 'I don't know, some woman wanting to know if the coast is clear.'

SECOND DEGREE
Two blondes are walking down the street. One notices a compact on the sidewalk and leans down to pick it up. She opens it, looks in the mirror and says, 'Hmm, this person looks familiar.'

The second blonde says, 'Here, let me see!'

So, the first blonde hands her the compact.

The second blonde looks in the mirror and says, 'You dummy, it's me!'

THIRD DEGREE
A blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her, so she goes out and buys a gun. She goes to his apartment unexpectedly and when she opens the door she finds him in the arms of a redhead. Well, the blonde is really angry.. She opens her purse to take out the gun, and as she does so, she is overcome with grief. She takes the gun and puts it to her head.

The boyfriend yells, 'No, honey, don't do it!!!'

The blonde replies, 'Shut up, you're next!'

FOURTH DEGREE
A blonde was bragging about her knowledge of state capitals. She proudly says, 'Go ahead, ask me... I know 'em all.'

A friend says, 'OK, what's the capital of Wisconsin ?'

The blonde replies, 'Oh, that's easy. Its W.'

FIFTH DEGREE
Q: What did the blonde ask her doctor when he told her she was pregnant?
A: 'Is it mine?'

SIXTH DEGREE
Bambi, a blonde in her fourth year as a UCLA Freshman, sat in her US Government class. The professor asked Bambi if she knew what Roe vs. Wade was about..

Bambi pondered the question; then, finally, said, 'That was the decision George Washington had to make before he crossed the Delaware .'

SEVENTH DEGREE
Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to find her house ransacked and burglarized. She telephoned the police at once and reported the crime. The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the radio, and a K-9 unit, patrolling nearby, was the first to respond.

As the K-9 officer approached the house with his dog on a leash, the blonde ran out on the porch, shuddered at the sight of the cop and his dog, then sat down on the steps. Putting her face in her hands, she moaned, 'I come home to find all my possessions stolen. I call the police for help, and what do they do? They send me a BLIND COP!'

Good stuff, Terry!

Excellent! Especially the 6th one...


maddog

Painful, but funny.

There are only two blonde jokes. The rest are all true ...

You never cease to amaze me. Love 'em all and my wife is a blonde. Come to think of it maybe that is why I think they are funny.
Quick true story. My dad was a police officer for forty years. Ten or so years as a detective. One time we were plinking at a dump and he found a nice pair of sunglasses. When we got home I found him looking in the phone book. I asked him what he was doing and he said "looking for the owner of these glasses. His name is on them." I asked what the name was and he said "Foster Grant." I could hardly stop laughing to tell him the truth.

When I was an art director and had about 25 illustrators in rows, we got into some pretty interesting stories and conversations.

Talking about hair color and stereotypes I made the comment that I had known a fair number of redheads and they all seemed to have some kind of genetic screw loose.

One sort of serious type says "I have to object to that, my mother is a redhead". Before I could apologize or anyone had a chance to say anything he added, "and come to think of it she is a bit of a squirrel".

We all liked to have hurt something laughing at the way it came out.

lol As usual.

I have an excellent staff of ghost writers that keep me looking good!

A blonde's car was damaged in a hail storm. She visits a body shop to get an estimate for repair. The busy owner noticed she was blonde, so he told her how she could fix the damage herself.

He told her to go home, and after the exhaust pipe cools down, blow on the tailpipe and the dents would pop out.

The blonde does as instructed. She goes home, and after a few hours she starts blowing on the tailpipe. She blows and blows and nothing happens.

About this time her best friend, another blonde, shows up to watch. She said, "You stupid girl, you'll never blow those dents out. Your windows aren't rolled up!"