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Joined: Mar 2011
Posts: 33,856
Campfire 'Bwana
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Campfire 'Bwana
Joined: Mar 2011
Posts: 33,856 |
My son's sorta girlfriend and her mom, sis and sis's daughter got screwed on a rental deal. Long story short, they can't go forward and they can't go back because their old place rented out.
My wife would like to move them in here because of the little one. I am not liking it.
I don't know the mom and she has health issues. The rental market in SoCal is actually pretty locked up especially on short notice.
I just retired in January and got the last of my kids out on their own in March.
There seems to be alot of liability involved with people I don't know. Money is not an issue as they have money to rent.
Am I lacking humanity? Selfish wanting to enjoy my new retirement and some privacy?
I spent almost 32 years in the fire service. I am not feeling like rescuing people anymore.
If I am an being an ass, let me know. Is the screwing you see coming inevitable and unavoidable? God expects you to be the man of the house. Your wife much prefers a mouse. Who's wrath is worse, His or getting cut off by the boss?
Last edited by eyeball; 08/30/13.
The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time by the blood of patriots and tyrants.
If being stupid allows me to believe in Him, I'd wish to be a retard. Eisenhower and G Washington should be good company.
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Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 1,116
Campfire Regular
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Campfire Regular
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 1,116 |
Not NO but HELL NO! No way would I allow such an arrangement. They got themselves into this mess, let them drag their own behinds.
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Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 6,170
Campfire Tracker
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OP
Campfire Tracker
Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 6,170 |
Well that was my first impulse. I do feel for them. The girl is very, very level headed, works 2 jobs, computer programer and horse trainer and does 10-12 hr days. Sister works a decent job. Even if they had a lock on a place I just don't want to take on 3 adults and a toddler. I do trust them to find a place, like I said they got screwed. My wife has a softer heart than I do I guess. If it was just K, I would do it. She is a really good, hard working and determined person.
Thanks
Fight fire, save lives, laugh in the face of danger.
Stupid always finds a way.
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Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 4,831
Campfire Tracker
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Campfire Tracker
Joined: Jan 2011
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As soon as you let them through your front door, CA law is heavily stacked AGAINST you. This is absolutely true. I've seen evictions started just to get a "friend" to leave the couch. Once that happens, the door is opened to being sued as a "landlord" and all the landlord laws apply. I wouldn't do it.
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Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 1,010
Campfire Regular
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Campfire Regular
Joined: Nov 2003
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No-Way Ho-Zay ,,, don't even get sucked into this. And while your at it, this could be a great teaching moment for your son to learn about rescuing leeches.
Wake up, smell the politician, and re-elect nobody.
"Nee how,nega bin da" (Mandarin: "Hello,dumb a$$)
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Joined: May 2001
Posts: 4,641
Campfire Tracker
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Campfire Tracker
Joined: May 2001
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My son actually allowed his ex -- a card carrying leach with no redeeming value -- and her current boy friend (whatever) to stay with him "for a week or so" when they lost their home. (They guy has kids by a previous, she "babysits" her own 4 kids, only when paid, on a part time basis!)
They never even looked for other housing til he got a legal eviction notice a year later. She is still pissed about it.
Soft heart plus soft head invite disasters like this.
1B
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Joined: Mar 2008
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Campfire Regular
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Campfire Regular
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Joined: May 2004
Posts: 56,166 Likes: 14
Campfire Kahuna
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Campfire Kahuna
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 56,166 Likes: 14 |
I am..........disturbed.
Concerning the difference between man and the jackass: some observers hold that there isn't any. But this wrongs the jackass. -Twain
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Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 22,736
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 22,736 |
Do not do it. Do not listen to your wife or cave on humanitarian grounds. Advise, assist and encourage from afar. A lesson learned is a future problem averted. They need to work this thru on there own. Also this "sorta partime girlfriend" is a secondary disaster waiting to happen.
My home is the "sanctuary residence" for my firearms.
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Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 96,121 Likes: 1
Campfire Oracle
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Campfire Oracle
Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 96,121 Likes: 1 |
Emotions don't trump logic.
"Dear Lord, save me from Your followers"
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Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 2,680
Campfire Regular
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Campfire Regular
Joined: Dec 2004
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Its like drugs...Just say NO
You may feel for them but in the long run it is the wrong thing to do
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Joined: Mar 2006
Posts: 19,504
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Mar 2006
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I understand that you'd like to help these people, but as others have pointed out, that could be a huge mistake.
I propose putting your and your wife's desire to help them to work by making a serious effort to help them find a place of their own. Contact realtors, beat the pavement, network with friends and friends of friends. Basically, help them help themselves.
4 out of 5 Great Lakes prefer Michigan. 
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Joined: Nov 2003
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Campfire Kahuna
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Campfire Kahuna
Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 67,752 Likes: 4 |
make your son move out, buy a home, and put his OWN 'sorta' inlaws up.
This is NOT your obligation.
Sam......
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Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 6,170
Campfire Tracker
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OP
Campfire Tracker
Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 6,170 |
make your son move out, buy a home, and put his OWN 'sorta' inlaws up.
This is NOT your obligation. My son didn't offer or ask but he has the same good heart as my wife.
Fight fire, save lives, laugh in the face of danger.
Stupid always finds a way.
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Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 5,659
Campfire Tracker
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Campfire Tracker
Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 5,659 |
"Far better it is to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered by failure, than to take rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy much nor suffer much" Teddy Roosevelt
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Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 31,004 Likes: 1
Campfire 'Bwana
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Campfire 'Bwana
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 31,004 Likes: 1 |
make your son move out, buy a home, and put his OWN 'sorta' inlaws up.
This is NOT your obligation. My son didn't offer or ask but he has the same good heart as my wife. Well, in Colorado, if they stayed for 6 months she could claim common law with your son. I'm not sure what the law is in CA, but you might want to make sure he's aware of that particular risk with your wife's idea...
You didn't use logic or reason to get into this opinion, I cannot use logic or reason to get you out of it.
You cannot over estimate the unimportance of nearly everything. John Maxwell
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Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 3,727
Campfire Tracker
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Campfire Tracker
Joined: Oct 2002
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Load your favorite belongings in a U Haul, drive around till you find some meth heads, or crack heads, give them your keys, put vehicle in gear, drive north or east till you find sanity,
DON'T LOOK BACK!!!!!!!!!!
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Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 3,009
Campfire Tracker
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Campfire Tracker
Joined: Aug 2006
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A friend of mine felt sorry for a good looking gal with a killer body. She moved in with her kids. Life was good for about six months. Guess the sex blinded him to the fact that she was a psycho. The kids would have been better behaved if they had been raised by wolfs.
Having lived there long enough to get some legal rights she started to bring male "friends" home and party when he worked nights. His life became hell and it took months for a lawyer to get her and her evil spawn evicted. Was so bad he actually moved out of his own house until she was removed.
Guess I'd have to vote no.
"An open message for all Democrats; "Look you are nothing and your work is worthless. Anyone who chooses you is detestable."
Isaiah 41:24 (HCSB)
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Joined: May 2003
Posts: 13,386 Likes: 4
Campfire Outfitter
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Campfire Outfitter
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 13,386 Likes: 4 |
My son's sorta girlfriend .... I think this is the key phrase....what happens if this relationship goes south? He couldn't kick her to the curb, she would legally live there.... If there a reason she just "sorta" girlfriend and not a serious girlfriend? Do you have any reasonable expectations you son could make these folks family in the future? I agree with Antelope Sniper. Bring in that tribe and you're not just asking for trouble, you're sitting up and begging for it. Rentals ain't that tight, anyway. If they have money, there is always something available to rent. L.W.
"Always go straight forward, and if you meet the devil, cut him in two and go between the pieces." (William Sturgis, clipper ship captain, 1830s.)
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Joined: Mar 2011
Posts: 14,712
Campfire Outfitter
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Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Mar 2011
Posts: 14,712 |
While I applaud your wife's compassion, I'd absolutely not allow it. A fire burned their home down and they had nowhere to go? OK, I can put you up for 3-4 days max. Don't get too comfy, as on the 5th day, you and the clan are out. Lost a lease/rental? Sorry to hear it, but all I'd have to offer is moral support. There are a couple adults involved; you all figure it out.
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