I don't even know anyone who has ever been down this road. I have showed up for local Jury duty a time or two, but in each case the Prosecutor and bad guy struck a deal the very morning of the trial's beginning.

I am guessing that for a federal matter the chances of an immediate pre trial deal are less, but I don't know.

I am actually looking forward to serving, if the case goes on to trial. Been wanting to do my civic duty in this regard for a long time.

BTDT.

Long trial, not fun. Good lawyers, great Judge. Was proud to be part of the jury. bunch of serious folks, who didn't try to get out of serving, though clearly, none of them wanted to be there. Hate to say it, but the trial fell right in between deer and elk season, in Arizona, and that was a relief to a few of us.

I think we did the right thing. took parts of 3 consecutive weeks, to seat the jury, hear the case, and bring back a verdict.

Sycamore

Our retired orchard manager's wife was called to a state case in Sacramento. Wasn't allowed to come home for the two and a half weeks that the trial ran.

It paid more than the pittance that you receive for county trials but you are sequestered from loved ones till the end of it.

I was summoned for grand jury duty twice. Once for a fed case and never had to report. Someone I know did report for that case and it lasted about 3 weeks.

The other was for a state investigative grand jury. It was an interesting deal, but was an 18 month commitment. I got excused from that one for a work reason.

Anyone know what the daily stipend is for the Fed courts? If they pay for my mileage (about 200 miles one way) and hotel, meals etc?

Might be quite the drag, but if it was ME with my life or livlihood and citizens rights on the line, I would want persons like me to step up and serve, so I will if called to.

Thanks for the stories and reports so far.

Pay is $40.00 per day + reasonable travel expenses. I'm not sure how they define reasonable travel expenses.

http://www.uscourts.gov/FederalCourts/JuryService/JurorPay.aspx

Well, that would be $200/week I am not getting right now. Added to my modest retirement, that is a helpful amount these days. So long as the court hearing times do not overlap deer season in mid October, I am down with it. If I get the IRS stanndard .52 per mile, I will ride my Harley up and be game, even more.

Here's a little more info from the Denver Federal Court:

http://www.cod.uscourts.gov/JurorInformation/JuryFAQs.aspx#22

How much will I be paid for jury service?
You will be paid an attendance fee of $40.00 per day, plus transportation expenses of $0.56 per mile from your home to the court house. We do not offer bus passes, but the $0.56 per mile from your home to the courthouse usually covers the amount required for bus fare. In addition, we also reimburse for parking, up to $8.00 per day.

If I live far from the courthouse, can I stay overnight before I have to report and how much do you reimburse for overnight accommodations?

If you live 70 driving miles or more (one-way) from the courthouse you can travel to Denver the day before you serve. You will be paid the $40.00 attendance fee for that day and an additional $215.00 (per day) for lodging and food expenses if you stay overnight in Denver. You will be paid an additional $66.00 for the day you travel home. The overnight and last day of travel reimbursement amounts may vary for other jury divisions.
You are responsible for making your own reservations for lodging. There are several downtown hotels convenient to the courthouse.

SWEET! Pretty good news there for me if I get called in. Lots of hotels in Spokane for about $60/night and to help my rotten kidneys I only eat one protien or meat meal a day. I just snack on high fiber foods the rest of the time. This might mean a short fender/fat rear tire kit for my hot Rod Harley Sportster if the trial or whatever lasts a week or more

My wife served on a high profile federal jury case in Erie, PA a couple of years ago. It was a good experience and she made important contributions to the deliberations. I'm amazed at all the people who want to avoid jury duty. We need good people like my wife (and some here at 24cf) to willingly serve.

They convicted the perp.

Steve.

I wouldnt mind serving, would actually enjoy seeing the process. I just simply couldnt afford it with a wife in college and a school aged boy at home.

Agreed 1000%

As I stated before, if it was my freedoms or yours at risk, even a lifetime's worth of work and wealth, maybe from a runaway Gov't agency or overzealous federal cop, would you not want 12 good people like yourself who could think logically to be on the jury?

You swear to God all the time that your dying on your feet, and you barely have two nickles to rub together, you sell stuff to others under the pretense that you need the money to survive, and the first damn thing you want to do with a little extra cash is buy "a short fender/fat rear tire kit for my hot Rod Harley Sportster" ?

You are amazing, and not in a good way.

I seriously am going to pray for your Wife, because she needs to see the light.

The times of shortage were two years ago. Much has changed in that time. And while essentially dying on my feet, I am trying to live as much as I can on the days that I feel up to it.

Also, perhaps you did not notice the smiley face at the end of my sentence. That means the whole sentence is a joke. I have already decided against that modification for the most part.

The main point of this thread is, 1) what to expect 2) We should all try to be a part of the American process when called upon to do so if it is at all possible to be and 3) would my expenses be covered sufficiently.

The having money left over part is just a fun side note. I have no earthly idea what we might need or use the money for IF I even get called and seated etc!

I sold a nice 22 rifle night before last, and handed the cash to Sherri to be used by her for some clothes that she wants, and new bedding. That our personal spending and budgeting details are being called into question or even being opened up for discusssion here is sad and inappropriate. Even in my toughest times, I was selling toys to make ends meet. I never asked for any handouts. That a couple of kind hearted people stepped up with some not requested help in a dark time is not the topic here.

First you answer a PERSONAL MESSAGE that I sent you in open forum, and now this.....

You are amazing, and not in a good way.

Write it off as an extended vacation...

Phil

Kinda works for me that way as I have a bunch of family near there.

Watch out for SanSucky! He hates your kind!



Travis

Federal court cases can run the gamut from serious criminal to trivial contract disputes.

I was the jury foreman on a week and a half court case over a contract dispute between two companies in different states. Was very interesting, actually, though a bit dry here and there. Had one lady that was coming from about 80 miles away, I think by the 4th day she gave up and got a local hotel room.

The important thing is that you're going into this with an open mind. That's good.

I try never to serve. I've found ways out of it so far.

Laughin'...

I don't think he's gonna make the cut.



Travis

What a fugging surprise.




Travis

Proof that prayers are answered.

Wonder if the case is insurance code related?

And if it does overlap deer season, Mr. Patriot, how are you going to get out of it?

Somebody is fixin to become a damn lair when this question is answered.

Yeah Mark, they find out you shoot deer and bear, I'm betting your ass is out of there.

I had better not let the prosecutors team see my bumper stickers!

One says "VISUALIZE No Liberals" and the other says "Only good guys with guns, stop bad guys with guns"

Another good reason to take the bike if I am able.

If they ask about your Medical Condition and you are as sick as you say , then they will kick your ass off before you ever get a chance to serve on extended jury duty .

This is probably true. Hard to stay awake and alert for very long. But, I am going to offer and serve if they want me too and I can. I did not know they would ask about medical conditions. We shall see.

They ask me and i told them since i was taking Beta Blockers , that if i sit for any period of time i can't stay awake, they told me to go home and i would be placed on a list to never be called again for jury duty. Dam that made me happy.

Yet, you want to ride a motorcycle 200 miles, each way. O-kay...

Man he contradicts himself all the time... 3 weeks ago he couldn't sleep kidneys shutting down to now he is ready for 3-4 weeks of jury duty so he can make some cash. Oh boy he needs a lot of praying to help him

I doubt he will fess up he sees a big payday if he is selected.

I would imagine in this day and age, if one has been charged and sent to court, the juror's duty is to affirm the guilt?

I mean, why go to trial if the dude wasn't guilty? ya know?

the jurors affirm the aforementioned decision. it's all process.

but, miracles do happen according to some who walk amongst us.

[qu
ote=add]Wonder if the case is insurance code related? [/quote]
I see what you did there.

Sooo, umm... I'm contemplating this whole jury duty thing.

What does it pay, exactly?



Travis

Free bump.




Travis

Gas money. But just barely.

During my last year on active duty I was selected as a juror on a General Courts Martial.

A 1stSgt was on trial. I won't go into the sordid details of his crimes, but suffice to say he went waaay off the reservation, in the area of abuse the special trust and confidence he was entrusted with.

He went from denial during the prosecution phase, to a blubbering, begging idiot during the penalty phase.

A jury of his peers had little sympathy on him. We gave him 2 years in the brig, reduction to the rank of Private, forfeiture of all retirement and other entitlements, and a Dishonorable Discharge. We felt we went easy on him, but we were guided by the UCMJ in our decisions.

That is sad at many levels. Would be a hard one to be a part of. But, good on ya for carrying out your duty when called to do so.

The only thing found sad about it was this dude had a wife and children. He didn't even tell them he was in trouble, and going GCM. He thought he was going to beat the charges and they would never know.

And the things he did to a junior enlisted Marine in his charge, were appalling.

You're such a fu(kin hypocrite.

Always has to be "about you" or something in it "for you" doesn't it?

You should be in DC.

I got a federal jury summons once. Was really kind of looking forward to it.

But i got beat out in the selection process by some unemployed minorities.

Holy fuggin' schitty.




Travis

i am wrapping up a two year stint in grand jury duty this fall. was supposed to be one year and then got extended for six months twice.

very interesting and sometimes even fun. big learning experience. kinda neat really.

good luck with it.

Thank you, we shall see how it goes with selection etc.

if you get picked don't count on ANYTHING getting you out of it. they literally will hunt your ass down with federal marshals if you don't show lol

Unless he is doing a dyno test on the super go fast Harley... Oh word advice for the OP don't take your pistol into a federal courthouse.

Just lie about it if they ask.
Lying shouldn't be a problem for a good Christian like yourself when there's some new Harley parts on the line.

The bumper stickers are on my pickup truck. I will most likely have to take that up there. Last time I tried to ride the MC to Spkane I had to stop a lot, and was laid up for a while afterwards. By the time this actually gets going, weather will probably be a factor as well. I do not ride in the rain or other bad conditions.

Fixed it.























This is too easy.

Talk about a target rich environment.

I believe in jury nullification and I REFUSE to rubber stamp the judge or prosecuting attorney. After all, this is not justice it's just acting and if an academy type award was awarded best actor either the defense or prosecutor would win although I've seen judges put on a pretty good performance too.

Now if this was a justice system instead of a legal system that would be one thing but it's not and I have better things to do with my time than play juror.

Jury duty has never been a big payday for me. Lucky if I got gas money.

Yup, they'll drag you out of the hospital or dig up your corpse.

What if an old sign in a gun-store says it's okay?

TFF!

Only if its from a illinois gun-store

I want to see you telling the Federal Judge, "I'm uber sorry Your Honor, but due to my physical condition, need for tires, and this duty overlapping deer season, I'm going to have to take a rain check on this jury duty that you wrote me about.. won't be able to help you this time.."

Would love to see the Judges face. He's not near as forgiving as the 24hr Fire.

It's like a really slow day in the duck marsh. No wind, nothing really flying and the blocks are looking lifeless. Then, all of a sudden here comes a dumb drake mallard swimming into the spread. You and your buddy look at each other, shrug shoulders and buck up to see who gets to take the shot as the bird jumps up when you both stand up and surprise the bird into flight.

But much to your dismay and disgust, the damned stupid bird, rather than launching skyward in terror as nature meant for him to, just cranes his neck, widens his eyes a bit maybe, and spins 180 degrees and starts swimming away instead. Little bastard doesn't take to wing despite getting shouted at, but just keeps on swimming. Almost out of range now, and not looking even much afraid any more, he shocks both duckmen and actually begins to offer up a couple of his weak vocalizations.

Your partner can't take it anymore, and sends an ounce and a quarter load of #2 steel moving out of the muzzle at 1550 and puts a stop to the show. Both share a look -- one feigned sheepish and one feigned of disappointment and scorn-- then a shrug and finally a pair of grins. They then start wrapping it up.

They each sleep that night, hoping that tomorrow's weather will bring the birds in hot, zigging and zagging and rapidly dropping both altitude and speed...

In other words, no guilt required. Sometimes, not often but every now and then, you just feel like you need to smack a meatball over the fence. Ain't no puzzle.

oooohhh, yeah we'd have to wrap dis chit up by deer season, patriotic obligations to The Constitution and all, I would request no one break for cigs or sidebars and let's fastrack this mofo

I have to be freed up by furry critter season, myself, Field Grade and probably one or two other people on this forum actually hunt.

Just wear your 'foil' hat, that will keep off the vampires, cosmic rays, etc., and be sure to tell them why you have to wear it!

You'll be home for deer season!!!

Uh mr judge you think i can get a advance on my jury pay?

Goddamm this is some funny schit.




Travis

Well said. And I'm not even a duck hunter.

I enjoyed the

"Will they pay for my motel, if I have to stay overnight?"

SWEET.

"I'll stay with friends or relatives and tell them I'm staying in a motel."


"Cha-pfukking-Ching"



You knew it was gonna be epic. UBER EPIC.



P.S. I like shooting ducks in the face. (no pun intended)

Pffft. I would Use the jury pay for new tat

Do they deduct Federal Income Taxes from Jury Duty pay?

if'n ya do get elected to serve on a jury, don't go to nullifying no decisions, ok? I mean, that's a close kept secret.

no they do not deduct taxes, you have to include it on your return for that year.

You have to give him credit for consistency. This site is the funniest thing on the internet. When I come on here I expect to get some great info and a good laugh in any given hour. This is truly democracy in action.

mike r

Trust me. He does need much prayer. He is not ready for 3-4 weeks of a jury duty unless they want to have it in our town. Mark has a very difficult habit to break of trying to put too many things into one day, or not being realistic about his physical limitations. The fact something is not realistic in my mind or someone else's mind is not going to stop him from trying. We all know the judge is not going to accept any person in late stage kidney disease unless the judge needs to get his head examined.

What is this about?

The Judge?

You got called for Petit jury and not Grand jury?

Yes. The judge. The guy who makes the decision on who is going to serve.

I don't know that much yet, just got the summons to serve. It is probably true that my failed kidneys and resultant symptoms will keep me out of the final jury pool, but I would have liked to have done it. In the past, when called for local jury duty I always showed up and was ready to be among the 12. Civic duty and responsability to our fellow citizens and our due proccess system requires it of those who can serve, to serve IMO.

Well there's that. Plus the forty bones a day. The 54 cents a mile is just gravy.

Not to take away from the easy money gravy train topic, but when you coming to the lone Prairie, Dude?

Never had a judge ask me, "GeoW, how's your kidneys today?" I guess you'll run your yap in the court room just like here?

Judge don't want to hear it... He's looking for jurors with a sound mind.

Now when he finds out that you are an addict, that will be different.

https://www.24hourcampfire.com/ubbth..._OOPS_A_gun_shop_showed_me_a#Post8777421

'cept when it's deer season...

Now I remember.

The notice does not indicate which type of jury you are being called for?

IME, they have different frequencies of convening and duration.

Suddenly, from somewhere up in the spirit world the ghost of an arse-shot bruin roars, 'YA THINK?'

Help a brother out, please. Lone Prairie? No comprendo, senor.

Cottonwood or Craigmont, I believe you had some connection there?
I could be wrong.

Impossibly slow moving shift, with time just crawling along practically in tectonic speed. Hoping some fruit will be borne from long-term surveillance and working on the word on the block and from CIs. Shift almost over, and it's about time, but damn, that one pinch will do a lot of good for the community. Not to mention that it'd be a rewarding conclusion to a prolonged investigation with a slippery scumbag.

En route to the barn and then home, a little disappointed and annoyed, on the last leg, all of a sudden, here's some drunken POS in a wife beater and SS ink whaling away on some broad. Well shyt, FIRST THING YA KNOW OLE JED'S A MILLIONAIRE!

You just made me spit saki.

Fuggin' dyin'...

GFooKY.



Travis

You just can't make chit like this up. Not even on that fake news site with the cop killing a baby.

and the imaginary judge is crazy.......

Ah, got it, and no sir, you're correct. Not sure about getting north to CW though. As an aside, does a place called Keuterville (sp?) ring a bell by any chance? Nice folks there, and in the bar there the gizzards n' tots are good. Cheap drinks, too.

I do have plans to head to the Boise area to spend time with a good buddy and his gal before setting out to thump ducks; prolly' some time between late fall and the season close. I like my birds fully plumed, given the choice.

You a duck man?

Ironyman.

Yeah, It's mostly jump shooting creeks or ponds around here.
I've deeked a fair amount on the big rivers, but we aren't in a flyway, really.
Field shooting of geese can be great, but it's a large year round population.
Old lab can't hunt anymore either so steelhead or hunting big game have been on the plate more.
If you make it to CW sometime and have time give holler.

IF you two want to meet me and see for yourselves what kind of man I really am VS this internet bashing, I will come along and bring my big choclate Lab and no gun or license. Just be the dog handler and assistant caller for as long as I can stand to do and be that. I have some good calls, layout blinds, duck and goose dekes etc. that I have not been able to use for a year or two.

If I have to leave the field early (Likely) Goober the birdbrain dog will retrieve geese and ducks for you without my being there once he has been around you a bit with me present. He is in his prime at 6 years old. Who would have known that I would turn up crippled up before he did

Sincere offer.

Kamo Gari, if you do not want to fly with a gun, I will adjust my offer and bring my pride and joy waterfowling gun for your use. It is a just freshly cerrakoted Benelli Super Black Eagle. It has been upgraded with an extended forcing cone/throat, limbsaver recoil pad, recoil reducer tube installed, and a titanium instant twist type slimline choke. I also have a large stock of Heavy Shot goose loads I can bring out. I cannot bear the pain of firing them or that gun lately. I bought some good stuff when I was still able to work, and I would like to see it and the dog especially get some use.

Ha ha! Yep, that's the place. If the proprietress that
took care of us the last time is still there, ask her about 'Boston Jeff' and the Mader family. Last time I was there Clint put a round through a lion's head. Salt of the earth folks there.











[img]http://i108.photobucket.com/albums/n29/birddown/ID%20Closer%20with%20Jeff%202011/ID2011237.jpg[/img]

[img]http://i108.photobucket.com/albums/n29/birddown/ID%20Closer%20with%20Jeff%202011/ID2011222.jpg[/img]

[img]http://i108.photobucket.com/albums/n29/birddown/ID%20Closer%20with%20Jeff%202011/ID2011216.jpg[/img]

[img]http://i108.photobucket.com/albums/n29/birddown/ID%20Closer%20with%20Jeff%202011/ID2011034.jpg[/img]


Absolutely will. If interested in joining, say so. Be pleased to have you. Private property and birds in numbers guys like me can only dream about here.

[img]http://i108.photobucket.com/albums/...1/Ducks%20last%20day/Idahoallpics224.jpg[/img]

[img]http://i108.photobucket.com/albums/...1/Ducks%20last%20day/Idahoallpics236.jpg[/img]

KG,

Once again some AMAZINGLY good photography there!

Out here as well I have had days with the sky just alive with waterfowl of several kinds. What a breathtaking sight and experience. And a good lab makes it even more so.

Outstanding pics.
I've never been on a cat hunt.
Shame.
If you head north again and have time, let me know.
Hunting, steelhead or just a cool beverage would be fun.

OK,,,, lets wrap this thing up guys.
The simple truth to this thing is that in an attempt to assure that a drug addicted, self centered, dishonest defendant somewhere in the PNW who's been charged with defrauding the gubment by falisifying expense records not be denied his constitutional right to trial by a jury of his "peers" SafariMan has been chosen to judge the scoundrel.


PS,,,, anyone know where the money paid to jurors for "expenses" actually comes from? I'm thinking it just falls from the sky, otherwise one might consider turning in false records and pocketing the money to buy Harley parts with stealing from his fellow tax paying "patriots".

I don't understand why the goverment would pay anything but expenses if your already getting a goverment check monthly

Because that's the way that it's set up, so liberal do-nothing's with an entitlement complex never have to work. (sarcasm). It's only welfare, entitlement or unearned disability if it's someone else getting it. If you're getting it, that check better show up on time every month!

Dude, he needs Harley parts.....
Is there a program from Zero for that?

That's another thing! What's this with people on welfare even having a Harley. I bet that he has a big TV, too. Welfare should only be for the bear (pun) necessities.

That's profiling......



and profiling is wrong.




P.S. did you get a free CD of the quartet?

Want mine?

safariman,

Unless you want to serve, you can escape jury duty due to health concerns.

I have a permanent exemption of CA jury duty due to numerous orthopedic surgeries. I'm not sure if it applies to federal jurisdiction. If not, my physician will write an exemption for that as well.

BTW, I believe that narcotic pain meds prevents jury service. That's ironic because I personally know a superior court judge who's addicted to norco due to serious back issues. He should take himself off the bench. He sure as hell ought not be deciding anyone's fate while he's looped on narcotics.

I will support and defend anyone who has to take prescribed narcotic pain medicine. However, when one is taking them there are some things he ought not due, like practice medicine, sit on a judge's bench, fly airplanes, engineer trains, captain ships, etc. A lawyer recently told me that lawyers who take narcotic pain meds have to disclose that fact to clients.

None present that day had been on a cat hunt before either, if I'm not mistaken. The rancher's son Eric had come across the site of a lion kill while coyote hunting a few days before I arrived.





The day the lion was shot Clint and my buddy Jeff were pushing up a ridge towards me; I was near the top. Clint explained that while slowing moving up, he kept hearing something behind him. Assuming it was a deer, he hunkered down and scanned. About 20 minutes later, he saw movement through brush; a black spot. He thought it was a deer's nose. Turns out it was the tip of the cat's tail. After he shot it, he backtracked its path in the snow. The thing had been stalking behind and on Clint's flank.

I'll give a shout to you before heading that way. I'd be pleased to get together, and if it'd be to hunt or fish, fantastic, but even a cold one, coffee or lunch'd work too.

Cheers, friend.

Gee, I'm shocked (not!) that your a shirker.

Just wonderin'....


Never heard if you got the gig.

Gonna be makin' it RAIN up in dis bitch!


JURY DUTY muthaphukkas!



Travis

A little sequesterin' with the big titty blond foreman chick
would be BALLIN'.
Do they pay a couple more cents for OT?

If I only eat ketchup packets, do I still get 100% per diem?




Travis

Laffin'.



Drain that creamer and sugar in the coffee room...Mocha......FREE.

Pastries? Hell, yes.....FREE.

If I ride my mtn. bike do I still get mileage?

I got myself talked into this schit.....when is the next round drafted?

When computing the overhead for jury duty, one must factor that sleeved shirts are required.

Could put you in the red.

Food for thought.



Travis

I will also be selling CD's from my quartet....I am the biggest member, BTW.

Can we post a small sign in the jury box?

Anyway,
Look for "The UBER BOYS" newest disc out now...

"Jesus Take The Wheel, but bring your gas card"......

at a Piggy Wiggly near you.

I'll probably gift the Judge one.....I'm a giver.

Speaking of ketchup packets....

Graphic pic warning!!!!!.....

Damn

Back in the day, I seen a preppy kid in high school going thru the hall with one of those stuck on the back of his Members Only jacket.



Hahahahahaha

DOOD...

Don't hate slave...I just gotta be me!

In the interest of full disclosure reporting, I do maintenance for a school district and this was in a junior high girls bathroom!

These youngins will jade you pretty quick but I just cracked up when I saw that.. Mebbe that's wrong? Do we really know for sure...

Gotta be a current sale thread somewhere in this pile o' poo...

"#9116919 - Yesterday at 08:27 PM 1903 30/06 in as new/ as issued condition. Perhaps even unfired"



Dood, you psychic?

Okay, let's end this schit show about jury duty for safariman right now.

The defendant has the RIGHT to an impartial jury and the prosecution, the defense, the Court, the jury, and the witnesses have the RIGHT to have the trial conducted in a truthful and expedient manner.

Safariman, you have no business being anywhere near that jury.

The court will, rightfully, ask you about any medical or physical issues that would preclude you from active service or impact your service on that jury panel. You kidney disease and your use of narcotics of various descriptions would and should preclude you from service. You should be proactive and contact the Court about those issues. When you do, they will relieve you from the current summons and rightfully remove you from the jury roll.

Your discussion of riding a motorcycle to/from in order to maximize the mileage reimbursement is ludicrous. Mileage reimbursements for motorcycles can be and often are different. Additionally, if your condition is as you say it is you jeopardize yourself and others on the road, in addition to the trial, by attempting that foolish stunt. Your discussion of staying with friends/family and submitting that you are in a hotel won't fly because the court will need the receipt to verify your stay, and any attempt on your part to do otherwise is a FEDERAL fraud offense.

Further, and a little research here goes a long way, it would appear that you've been party to legal proceedings before. That history would quite likely have you off that jury. Consider that.

Do the right thing; contact the court, inform them of your conditions, and get yourself off the jury roll for this trial and all others.

If you somehow slipped through the cracks and ended up on a jury, even if you saw the trial all the way through to conclusion, your presence on the jury alone would be grounds for a mistrial and retrial. Think about that in relation to the other citizens who are on trial, serving as witnesses and attorneys, and on the jury. Whatever you think you might get out of this pales in comparison to what you needlessly risk for and of others by even considering this.

Uh, I hadn't thought about all those points............
Can I just set up a CD/gun sales table in the hall.....
With a sign?

How bout a live show from my quartet? Can we take a "good will offering"?
If yes, should we wait for a recess first?

Thanks in advance.

That depends, are you selling Ruger Charger pistols? If so are they complete packages, or mix and match grab bags?

I knew we were gonna get past the bloody tampon hump. But I'm not sure we have the stomach for 4ager's candid review on the feasibility of using jury duty as a means of capital gain.

Dude's cold as ice.




Travis

Makes me wish I could have grifted the system to make up for the week of truckers, meth and pedophilia I had to sit through as an alternate, just to watch the prosecutor f*ck it up in the end.

If I could have found a way to get more than the $60 check, it would have made it all worth while.

Agreed.
I'm still waiting for the opinion on the table sales to recoup the lost revenue of declining duty.
I have a handicapped sign on my mirror if that helps....

Butt fugger's tip of the day:

Your local Food Bank.

Hint.




Travis

Flave, it was a maxi-pad, not a tampon. Get your feminine hygene products straight for god sakes!

Also, it was a fake. Which makes it funnier. Or sicker, depending on how you roll.

Good news is the color scheme is what inspired me to accept that 54 stock the way it is, which I've decided to will to the CEO of flave precision.

Bad news is I'm immortal, so the wait might be long..

My apologies for not being more familiar with with feminine hygiene products.





Travis

�ber accepted

I just finished a 35 page thread [ I know, I need a hobby] in which TRH and TAK waxed elequent as only they can. A slightly used tampon is like a breath of fresh air after those guys.

mike r

Apology accepted. Some slack should be extended, however, being that it was probably dark, and you were that busy jamming the offending items into your sock before proceeding with your dirty birdyisms, and as such didn't really have time for a thorough examination. You're on notice, though.

How does a thread go from Jury duty,

to this:



to tampons???


Wow....the rabbit holes....

It's the Campfire way.

Kit...Tee

Kat!

bingo cross!

And AS, fantastic pic..

Kamo caught wind a tampon verbiage and marched right over to line me out. I feel cyber-bullied.

Anyway, gotta get the raincoats on and send the kids out. These sidewalks ain't gonna panhandle themselves!



Travis

Safariman keeps his on his handlebars

Right! It could be we can help each other out. You bring me a brick of .22 LR and a case of St. Ides, I'll give you the secrets to safe and fruitful fleecing of the pigeons (tourists of all flavors and country bumpkins in town for a weekend) in 5 easy steps. That you're utilizing wet kids shows you're halfway there as far as attitude, but imagine now some fake hand prints on faces, bruises, fake missing teeth, with one crying in a wheelchair (props are extra BTW) and a torn boot and the other looking very, very sad.

I'm tellin' ya, you'll be thanking me later. Stipend for jury service, gas and snacks is chump change compared to this hustle. Just know that not just anyone gets this kind of offer. These cats ain't doing it right, fr'example.



P.S. If you act now, I'll toss in the best places for free shyt like blankets, hot meals, free IV tools and much, much more...

Ma... Maa

See... Tah!

Ridiculous I know, but being that the entirety of the original post was so zany, well, it only seems right to join in. Monkey see, monkey do and whatnot.

That is so badass.....

That schitt gets old doesn't it? My God he's more full of schitt than he is of himself!

Yet you want to ride your sporster there. Nice. Hope you don't slide it into a family of 6 on the way.

Read his posts here: https://www.24hourcampfire.com/ubbth...9606/Re_2_Combat_Masterpiece#Post9119606

I thought the Combat Masterpiece question was odd.

Until I saw who was selling...

Too fuggin' funny.



Travis

a little late to the game, I ignored this thread until my wife got a federal jury summons in the mail yesterday

it starts with her filling out an online survey.

not sure what her job's policy is on jury duty. She works at a public school as a teaching assistant.

Missing 3 weeks during the school year is a pretty big deal

Kids adapt.

Make sure she rapes them for the per diem and mileage.

Can she ride a motorcycle?

This may be your chance to get one for her to use.

Until the trials over.

Then snag it.