I live east of Tulsa in a remote small neighborhood and was coming home just at dark. I notice a car about 100 yards in front of me suddenly swerve over into the left lane. As I approach the approximate area the car swerved I see a guy riding a bicycle down the middle of the lane.
As I get closer I start blowing my horn and they guy just keeps riding right in the middle of the road at about 20 mph. The speed limit is 40 mph on this road. He is in full riding regalia. Helmet with little mirror attached, bike riding spandex singlet, hydration backpack and bike shoes. No lights on the bike and no reflectors visible. So I pull up along side him keeping my required 3 feet distance, roll down my window and ask him if he knows he is supposed to ride as close to the right side of the road as is safe to do so.
This dude explodes. Starts cussing and steers toward the side of my truck. I thought he was going to grab the window frame. Calls me a f u c k i n g moron, a white, redneck, bigot and proceeds to tell me he is a bike riding instructor and I didn't know what I was talking about. Then he name drops the name of a local attorney who organizes the Tulsa TUF bike race every year and says he wrote the law. I know the attorney and he is a flake. I told him I was an attorney(I don't know why because I rarely volunteer that information and very few people would guess that is my profession) and I know the law because I had to prosecute a number citations issued to bike riders for doing what he is doing. (Actually, the tickets I prosecuted as a city attorney were for bikers riding 3 or more abreast and impeding automobiles on a two land road). Then I started chuckling and ask him how I could be a bigot for telling him to obey the law. He told me I was a bigot because I was an ignorant, Trump supporting, middle aged white guy driving a truck. (In other words a good American-it is even a Ram 1500 4x4) I told him that was not the definition of a bigot. He told me it was and he knew what a the word bigot meant because he was an English professor. At least he didn't claim to have invented bicycles.
So I go on my way for a few more yards to entrance to my neighborhood and after I make my turn this dude turns in behind me. So I pull over and get out of my truck thinking maybe he wanted to further discuss our difference of opinion and I don't want some crazy bike dude following me home. He rides by without stopping and asks if I have a problem. I said "only with you buddy" and get back in my truck to go home. This dude make the same 3 turns I have to make to go home and rides right by my house. At each turn this dude does not stop at the stop signs and rides right in the middle of the road. So by this time I am pissed having to follow this arrogant asshat and decide I will follow him to his house so we can further discuss the problem. So I follow him as he rides around my neighborhood for the next 30 minutes never stopping at a stop sign or signaling his turns and staying 60 feet or so in front of me. I have a full tank of gas and get to laughing wondering how long this tubby, English professor/bike instructor can keep peddling this bike in the 90+ degree weather and high humidity we have been having because now he probably doesn't want to stop and further discuss the finer points of bike law with some crazy Trump lovin, gun ownin, truck drivin, redneck. I am certain he can't do it for 300+ miles and I don't have to be back in my office until Monday morning. I have AC, 2 liters of water, some rations, a radio and a full can of Grizzly. Lets go for a bike ride.
After about an other 10 minutes he cycles back toward my house and pulls into a small park 2 houses down from my house. Now I really can't go home. So I pull into a parking spot with a view of where he is sucking wind and sweating like a pig and light him up with my brights. After another 5 minutes he walks up to my truck bitching about me following him. I tell him I was doing so because it was full dark and he is riding a bike without lights or reflectors and I didn't want him to get run over. This dude is huffing and puffing and can barely speak 5 words to me in a string. I tell him I have a lengthy video of him running stop signs and failing to signal his turns. He tells me he has beat 2 tickets for that in the past and it isn't against the law. He tells me will turn on his lights when I quit following him and he doesn't have to signal and can't come to a complete stop without unhooking his bike shoes. He goes on to tell me I don't know the law. That he wouldn't want to be my client and again reminds me is an English professor. I said "that figures" and he ask what I meant by that comment. I said because you are obviously a liberal, entitled turd who doesn't mind inconveniencing people and are what is wrong with this country. He got back on his bike and said he hoped protesters killed me someday because he wasn't a supporter of them, but after his encounter with me he is. He also tells me I made him miss a phone call . I respond "that breaks my heart". I ask him if he needed me to follow him home since he didn't have lights and he said he didn't need anymore help from me. At this point he turned on his bike lights, both front and back. and the red blinker on his helmet. So as he was riding away I said "Trump 2020" and wished him well. He said I hope he wins because he has already destroyed the Republican party. He rode right past my house again and I had to wait for him to peddle his fat ass the entire 1/4 mile of my street and turn before I could go home. My 20 something year old self would have handled it in a way that would have been more satisfying, but jail, disbarment and lawsuits did not seem like fun at nearly 60. I probably just should have pulled to the left and gone around him after the approaching car went by, but I couldn't believe someone would be so damned inconsiderate to ride in the middle of the road at night and do so without lights and without guiding right for an overtaking, horn blowing vehicle. This [bleep] is why people hate bike riders.
This is Oklahoma law on the issue the professor and I were debating. You fellows decide who was correct and who was the bigot.
A. Every person operating a bicycle or motorized scooter upon a roadway at less than the normal speed of traffic at the time and place and under the conditions then existing shall ride as close as is safe to the right-hand curb or edge of the roadway, except under any of the following situations:
1. When overtaking and passing another vehicle proceeding in the same direction;
2. When preparing for a left turn at an intersection or into a private road or driveway;
3. When reasonably necessary to avoid conditions and while exercising due care, including but not limited to:
a. fixed or moving objects,
b. parked or moving vehicles,
c. pedestrians or animals,
d. surface hazards, or
e. any time it is unsafe to continue along the right-hand curb or edge of the roadway; and
4. When riding in the right-turn-only lane.
B. Any person riding a bicycle or motorized scooter upon a one-way street or highway with two or more marked lanes of travel may ride as close as is safe to the left-hand curb or edge of the street or highway.
C. No person operating a bicycle or motorized scooter shall pass other vehicles between lanes of traffic traveling in the same direction.
D. Persons riding bicycles or motorized scooters upon a roadway shall not ride more than two abreast except on paths or parts of roadways set aside for the exclusive use of bicycles or motorized scooters. Persons riding two abreast shall not impede the normal and reasonable flow of traffic and, on a lane roadway, shall ride within a single lane.
Perry
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Last edited by PWN; 07/10/20.
