Snapping turtles? When I was a kid I shot a snapper through the neck with a .22 LR and watched a caliber size stream of blood pump from that hole. I went on and some time later came back and that turtle had crawled about 150 yards to a pond pumping blood all the way. Catfish seem to be able to hang on out of the water for a surprising amount of time.

Every normal man must be tempted, at times, to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats.