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Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 28,625 Likes: 10
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 28,625 Likes: 10 |
Just start a couple of months in advance with the negotiations. I do that and it works like a charm! Here's how: When with your wife, ether out or watching TV, and when you spot a guy with a beard like the ZZ Top guy, turn to her and say "Honey, I think I'll grow a beard like that!" Don't say anything else. Just let it sink in. Then when you see a Duck Dynasty commercial with all the Robertson's ask her "Which beard do you prefer?" The next time you see a homeless guy with his beard down to his chest, tell her you want a beard just a bit longer than that guy's...  Keep it up until you hear the magic words... "If you are going to have a beard, it better be short and well trimmed!"Mission accomplished!  I like this!
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Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 10,258
Campfire Outfitter
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Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 10,258 |
One time at work a lady made a comment that my beard was getting a bit shaggy - my response : winter coat. A bunch of other women standing around started laughing out loud. Never heard another comment again.
Ed
A person who asks a question is a fool for 5 minutes the person who never asks is a fool forever.
The worst slaves are those that put the chains on themselves.
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Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 4,239 Likes: 1
Campfire Tracker
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Campfire Tracker
Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 4,239 Likes: 1 |
Not the most pressing issue of our times, but need advice on how to win my wonderful wife over to accept a beard. I've had a beard for nearly 41 years. My bride TOLD me she preferred the beard to my stubble, even shortly after shaving. Said it was much less scratchy.That might work.
Someday I hope to be the person my dogs think I am . . .
The only true cost of having a dog is its death.
Someone once said "a nation of sheep will beget a government of wolves."
Shiloh Sharps . . . there is no substitute.
NRA Endowment Member
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Joined: Sep 2014
Posts: 1,261 Likes: 1
Campfire Regular
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Campfire Regular
Joined: Sep 2014
Posts: 1,261 Likes: 1 |
Pound it out like it was the first time you guys got really kinky. Get a little drunk and just tear it up for all your worth, keeping her pleasure in mind. When you are both lying in a pool of sweat panting, basking in the glory, look over and tell her, " The beard stays". She will not argue.
"Faster horses, younger women, older whiskey, and more money." -Tom T Hall
Molon Labe
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Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 32,130 Likes: 1
Campfire 'Bwana
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Campfire 'Bwana
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 32,130 Likes: 1 |
Mustache rides can be quite compelling.
If you put Taco Bell sauce in your ramen noodles it tastes just like poverty
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Joined: May 2016
Posts: 60,944 Likes: 70
Campfire Kahuna
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Campfire Kahuna
Joined: May 2016
Posts: 60,944 Likes: 70 |
Mustache rides can be quite compelling. Yeah, they are not too bad. Some are better than others though.
I am MAGA.
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Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 12,371 Likes: 7
Campfire Outfitter
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Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 12,371 Likes: 7 |
With my wives and girlfriends, there was no problem. In 1986 I got chicken pox as an adult. My face looked like the craters of the moon, and I could not shave for 9 weeks. The beard has never come off. When it all started, I'd just met my first wife, Satan. She never complained about it. Wife 2.0 AKA KYHillChick has never seen me without it.
Just grow a pair and start letting it grow. If she doesn't like it, she'll run off with the mailman or something and you can get a new one that likes the beard. Just remember, she would have anyway. The beard was just an excuse.
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Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 13,952 Likes: 1
Campfire Outfitter
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Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 13,952 Likes: 1 |
Been married to the same woman for almost 47 years and never had a problem with her caring the least bit whether I grew a beard or not. The only thing she's ever said was that she didn't much like the looks of goatees. I used to start growing a full beard in the Fall and shave it all off in the Spring but since retiring I quit shaving altogether and have kept a full beard year-round.
Mine's mostly all white now with a little red mixed in. I always have a some laughs because of my beard with little kids especially around Christmas time. I get a kick out of watching them watching me thinking I'm Santa Clause or could be. They really can do some serious kissing up too.
I've had kids that were acting rowdy and disobeying their parents/grandparents in stores all of a sudden see me and their jaws drop and immediately straighten up and start being good.
One cute little toddler of around two or three years old saw me in Cracker Barrel gift shop went and got a little tricycle and dragged it over to show me and started jabbering in baby talk and pointing at the trike. I really couldn't understand what all she was saying but I think she was letting me know that that tricycle was what she wanted for Christmas.
A young Downs Syndrome girl probably somewhere in her teens with an older woman I assume was her mother grandparent or a guardian holding her hand walking across a grocery store parking lot spotted me sitting in my car. She immediately started grinning real big and tugging at the woman who was holding her hand pointing at me and waving all excited.
You never know what the future might hold but barring any unforeseeable circumstances that would require me to shave it all off I figure I'll most likely be buried with a full beard still intact.
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Joined: Mar 2011
Posts: 655
Campfire Regular
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Campfire Regular
Joined: Mar 2011
Posts: 655 |
Not the most pressing issue of our times, but need advice on how to win my wonderful wife over to accept a beard. How does she get you to accept a new hairstyle or colour? I am guessing she just does it, doesn't care about your opinion, asks you later. I would follow her lead.
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Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 5,866
Campfire Tracker
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Campfire Tracker
Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 5,866 |
Grow the thing and ignore her, when she bitches about it more than you can ignore bring up something you hate that she does.
Eating fried chicken and watermelon since 1972.
You tell me how I ought to be, yet you don't even know your own sexuality,, the philosopher,,, you know so much about nothing at all. Chuck Schuldiner
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Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 25,143 Likes: 2
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 25,143 Likes: 2 |
Mustache rides can be quite compelling. Yeah, they are not too bad. Some are better than others though. 
“Life is life and fun is fun, but it's all so quiet when the goldfish die.”
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Joined: Nov 2017
Posts: 9
New Member
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New Member
Joined: Nov 2017
Posts: 9 |
Really simple.
don't shave for a few days.
put your head between her thighs.
rub around a lot until she is brush burned badly.
then splain to her hew a nice beard, treated with hair softner would just give her a nice tickle while you were "yodeling in the canyon".
I've had mine for 50 years ---- no complaints.
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Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 10,704 Likes: 1
Campfire Outfitter
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Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 10,704 Likes: 1 |
Interesting photo album Root! ![[Linked Image]](https://i.imgur.com/GjXuguB.jpg) Everyone remembers you pretending to be your wife Karen here on the board a few years back (BossLady), but wasn't aware you actually dress up in her clothes! lol Apparently your wife Karen is the one doing the "yodeling" in the "man" canyon. Sick phfucugger. 
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Joined: May 2011
Posts: 56,399 Likes: 10
Campfire Kahuna
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Campfire Kahuna
Joined: May 2011
Posts: 56,399 Likes: 10 |
Not sure why you would post this claiming to be someone it's not. You can right click on the image and Google search it. Comes up as a Walmart photo.
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An 8 dollar driveway boy living in a T-111 shack
LOL
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