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Joined: Feb 2006
Posts: 6,898
Campfire Tracker
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Campfire Tracker
Joined: Feb 2006
Posts: 6,898 |
My wife is a great driver, however she can't back up worth a flying fuqk! Same here. My wife backed into a tree in our yard. Big ole maple. Knocked out the back windows and crushed the tear piller of her grand Cherokee. I just told her it must have caught her by surprise, trees only been there for about 50 years.
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Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 10,011 Likes: 4
Campfire Outfitter
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Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 10,011 Likes: 4 |
My wife does almost verbatim what your wife does the few times I let her drive. That is not the worst part. She can't follow me worth a damn. My daughters are another story. They can drive great and one can follow me like a trailer.
Some male drivers can't follow to save their own life or back a trailer. I eliminate them quickly from being around me because they are a liability.
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Joined: May 2005
Posts: 622 Likes: 3
Campfire Regular
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Campfire Regular
Joined: May 2005
Posts: 622 Likes: 3 |
I totally agree slum!
My wife and I started dating over 30yrs ago. Taking the back roads into town, her car but can't remember who was driving, I spotted a deer. She couldn't find it. Mowed alfalfa field, less than 100yds from the road! No trees for over 500yds in any direction! We're stopped in the road and she can't find the deer! Forget it! We continue towards town and I bring up the deer. She tells me about 2 eye diseases she has in both eyes, which have processed with age. Driving is ok in daylight and depth perception is rough. Since then, she has driven with me riding shotgun less than 10 times! Most of those were to the hospital for my kidney stones. Bless her heart! She stops at red lights and seems like eternity at the stop signs and never misses a pothole!
Oyeah, I'll drive.
R.D.
For HIS service,
R.D.
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Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 23,522 Likes: 15
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 23,522 Likes: 15 |
I’d rather drive my boat in a near hurricane than be in the passenger seat with my wife driving. No idea how she doesn’t have 40 tickets.
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Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 69,403 Likes: 23
Campfire Kahuna
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Campfire Kahuna
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 69,403 Likes: 23 |
Buddy if mine says woman shouldn’t be allowed to operate any machinery more complicated than a toaster. 😜
"Allways speak the truth and you will never have to remember what you said before..." Sam Houston
Texans, "We say Grace, We Say Mam, If You Don't Like it, We Don't Give a Damn!"
~Molɔ̀ːn Labé Skýla~
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Joined: Oct 2013
Posts: 18,963 Likes: 3
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Oct 2013
Posts: 18,963 Likes: 3 |
2 things women shouldn't do. drive or vote Or talk!!
The last time that bear ate a lawyer he had the runs for 33 days!
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Joined: Sep 2011
Posts: 61,201 Likes: 28
Campfire Kahuna
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Campfire Kahuna
Joined: Sep 2011
Posts: 61,201 Likes: 28 |
If your mother was a woman, please stand up. 
These premises insured by a Sheltie in Training ,--- and Cooey.o
"May the Good Lord take a likin' to you"
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Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 1,552 Likes: 1
Campfire Regular
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Campfire Regular
Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 1,552 Likes: 1 |
When I was a kid, Dad once yelled for Mom to stop. We were on our country road, so she did, he told her to back up, she inquired why, he told her she had missed a pothole and he wanted her to have a perfect score.
She didn’t think it was as funny as me and Dad did…..:)
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Joined: Jul 2020
Posts: 2,422 Likes: 1
Campfire Regular
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Campfire Regular
Joined: Jul 2020
Posts: 2,422 Likes: 1 |
What about Danica Patrick? Did she ever win a race?
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Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 3,728
Campfire Tracker
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Campfire Tracker
Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 3,728 |
I have 4 broken ribs,my wife has made me scream for the last 2 weeks with her driving. Norco was no match to her driving.
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Joined: Oct 2011
Posts: 59,236 Likes: 37
Campfire Kahuna
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Campfire Kahuna
Joined: Oct 2011
Posts: 59,236 Likes: 37 |
My wife is a great driver, however she can't back up worth a flying fuqk! Same here. My wife backed into a tree in our yard. Big ole maple. Knocked out the back windows and crushed the tear piller of her grand Cherokee. I just told her it must have caught her by surprise, trees only been there for about 50 years. Lol, they might be long lost sisters.
Paul
"I'd rather see a sermon than hear a sermon".... D.A.D.
Trump Won!, Sandmann Won!, Rittenhouse Won!, Suck it Liberal Fuuktards.
molɔ̀ːn labé skýla
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Joined: Sep 2011
Posts: 61,201 Likes: 28
Campfire Kahuna
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Campfire Kahuna
Joined: Sep 2011
Posts: 61,201 Likes: 28 |
So, you dial, 9-1-1, the diver is a women, then what?
These premises insured by a Sheltie in Training ,--- and Cooey.o
"May the Good Lord take a likin' to you"
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Joined: Aug 2011
Posts: 8,793
Campfire Outfitter
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Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Aug 2011
Posts: 8,793 |
l told my pap and mam I was going to be a mountain man; acted like they was gut-shot. Make your life go here. Here's where the peoples is. Mother Gue, I says, the Rocky Mountains is the marrow of the world, and by God, I was right.
- Del Gue
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Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 69,403 Likes: 23
Campfire Kahuna
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Campfire Kahuna
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 69,403 Likes: 23 |
"Allways speak the truth and you will never have to remember what you said before..." Sam Houston
Texans, "We say Grace, We Say Mam, If You Don't Like it, We Don't Give a Damn!"
~Molɔ̀ːn Labé Skýla~
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Joined: Nov 2002
Posts: 33,790 Likes: 11
Campfire 'Bwana
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Campfire 'Bwana
Joined: Nov 2002
Posts: 33,790 Likes: 11 |
My wife has learned that a car that scoots when you need it and halts as well is a safe car. At least something rubbed off...
Conduct is the best proof of character.
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Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 4,600 Likes: 5
Campfire Tracker
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Campfire Tracker
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 4,600 Likes: 5 |
I'll put her up against almost any man.
But then, most men can't pass a CDL and run a 13 speed.
She has and can! Same with mine, but in her case championships in three different road racing classes (G Production, Formula Ford and Formula V).
Last edited by logger; 10/25/21.
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Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 67,438 Likes: 62
Campfire Kahuna
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Campfire Kahuna
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 67,438 Likes: 62 |
I was a youngster riding with my grandparents
Grandmother squinted, is that light up there red or green ? Grandpa... what light ?
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Joined: Jan 2013
Posts: 8,304 Likes: 6
Campfire Outfitter
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Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Jan 2013
Posts: 8,304 Likes: 6 |
2 things women shouldn't do. drive or vote That's what the Saudi's think too, I can see why. My wife scares the shyte outa me, I just think something is going to step out in front of her while I am sitting there in the passenger seat, helpless.
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Joined: Aug 2009
Posts: 9,920 Likes: 1
Campfire Outfitter
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Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Aug 2009
Posts: 9,920 Likes: 1 |
My wife of 40 years has two positions when driving, accelerating or breaking
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Joined: Sep 2011
Posts: 45,375 Likes: 27
Campfire 'Bwana
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Campfire 'Bwana
Joined: Sep 2011
Posts: 45,375 Likes: 27 |
Mine's pretty good, for the most part. A bit too slow and careful for my tastes. Finds a few more potholes than necessary, but can't seem to park straight even when there are lines around the spot.
Oh well, she's making us some sort of blueberry/oatmeal dessert and has a good income, so I'll likely keep her around.
The desert is a true treasure for him who seeks refuge from men and the evil of men.
In it is contentment
In it is death and all you seek
(Quoted from "The Bleeding of the Stone" Ibrahim Al-Koni)
member of the cabal of dysfunctional squirrels?
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