|
|
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 32,130 Likes: 1
Campfire 'Bwana
|
Campfire 'Bwana
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 32,130 Likes: 1 |
I had a drunk chick want to box when I was in college. She was absolutely adamant about it.
I said "ok"....and right hooked her ass as hard as I could. Sober, but same. The taekwondo weenies renting the studio before our MMA group when I was in the corps had a black belt female that would always trash talk when we came in after. Challenge given. Challenge accepted. Life lesson learned. Muscle mass matters. Didn't feel bad about her, but after, when her husband got frisky, I felt kinda bad. Did you fügk her husband? Fugged him up pretty bad in the ring. If you're 5'7" 150, going full bore with a guy 6'1" 200 with a 76" wingspan and reflexes from 15 years as a goalie gets ugly pretty quick. Funny thing is, last time I got my ass whupped the guy was about that size, but there were no rules or ring involved. As a rule I don't fügk with hairless albino supervillains regardless of wing span and it has nothing to do with my wearing glasses.
If you put Taco Bell sauce in your ramen noodles it tastes just like poverty
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 23,565 Likes: 2
Campfire Ranger
|
Campfire Ranger
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 23,565 Likes: 2 |
never been in a situation to, hope to never be
Last edited by KFWA; 12/29/21.
have you paid your dues, can you moan the blues, can you bend them guitar strings
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 31,625 Likes: 5
Campfire 'Bwana
|
|
Campfire 'Bwana
Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 31,625 Likes: 5 |
I had a drunk chick want to box when I was in college. She was absolutely adamant about it.
I said "ok"....and right hooked her ass as hard as I could. [bleep] Irishmen. Just like your mother! Ya can’t take a punch!
Founder
Ancient Order of the 1895 Winchester
"Come, shall we go and kill us venison?
And yet it irks me the poor dappled fools,
Being native burghers of this desert city,
Should in their own confines with forked heads
Have their round haunches gored."
WS
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 17,737 Likes: 1
Campfire Ranger
|
|
Campfire Ranger
Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 17,737 Likes: 1 |
I was working in a bar 20 plus years ago had a big lesbian in there causing trouble I went over and tapped her on the shoulder and told her to knock it off or she was going to be escorted out she started draw her fist back like she was going to hit me I told her I'll knock your teeth right out your ass she said you wouldn't hit me I'm a woman I see you're not a woman you're not acting like a woman so she said I'll behave behave the rest of the night I come in a couple nights later not working just to have a few drinks she actually bought me a beer and kind of became friends for a year or two after that occasionally when we'd run into each other. Another time guy a bitch slapped his girlfriend, I slammed him into a wall, she jumped on my back and started clawing at my pretty face, I reached back and got a hand full of hair, and thru her off me. The cops showed up and took them both, I had some pretty good scratches on my face for a couple of weeks took a lot of ribbing from my buddies about it! Closest iv come to hitting one.
Deer Camp! about as good as it gets!
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2018
Posts: 23,506
Campfire Ranger
|
|
Campfire Ranger
Joined: Jan 2018
Posts: 23,506 |
What about choking? Asking for Beav… Only to the point where their eyelashes flutter like a butterfly. Then full release! 🦫
Curiosity Killed the Cat & The Prairie Dog
“Molon Labe”
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 69,309 Likes: 17
Campfire Kahuna
|
|
Campfire Kahuna
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 69,309 Likes: 17 |
I had a drunk chick want to box when I was in college. She was absolutely adamant about it.
I said "ok"....and right hooked her ass as hard as I could. [bleep] Irishmen. Just like your mother! Ya can’t take a punch! LOL !
"Allways speak the truth and you will never have to remember what you said before..." Sam Houston
Texans, "We say Grace, We Say Mam, If You Don't Like it, We Don't Give a Damn!"
~Molɔ̀ːn Labé Skýla~
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 3,979 Likes: 1
Campfire Tracker
|
|
Campfire Tracker
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 3,979 Likes: 1 |
I’d punch you in your clitoris. 🦫 Freaking killin me 'Beave'
Coyotes shot no waiting.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 10,988 Likes: 3
Campfire Outfitter
|
|
Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 10,988 Likes: 3 |
Yes.....and if that offends someone, too bad! It was not a woman......it was non-binary! memtb
You should not use a rifle that will kill an animal when everything goes right; you should use one that will do the job when everything goes wrong." -Bob Hagel
“I’d like to be a good rifleman…..but, I prefer to be a good hunter”! memtb 2024
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2010
Posts: 6,659
Campfire Tracker
|
|
Campfire Tracker
Joined: May 2010
Posts: 6,659 |
Like Mike Tyson said about the internet bullies. They only talk that way because they have never been punched in the face. Mike ain’t real bright but he got that correct. And yes I would. Edk Say that to The Champs face…….. I do not consider him dumb……
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 12,664
Campfire Outfitter
|
|
Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 12,664 |
I was raised to never hit a lady.
The Karma bus always has an empty seat when it comes around.- High Brass
There's battle lines being drawn
Nobody's right if everybody's wrong
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2010
Posts: 6,659
Campfire Tracker
|
|
Campfire Tracker
Joined: May 2010
Posts: 6,659 |
I was raised to never hit a lady. Why would you?😉 I bet you would doing her the horizontal tango or reverse cowboy!
Last edited by fester; 12/29/21.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 12,580
Campfire Outfitter
|
|
Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 12,580 |
On the funny ass-whupp'n side of things, when I was a new nurse on night shift I thought I was too cool to wear the break-away name badge/ID lanyard. I was climbing a lot back then, and used a piece of spectra cord.
When co-workers told me it was dumb, I was all macho "It ain't no big deal"
Then one night a confused, septic little old lady, maybe 105 pounds dripping wet, grabbed that thing and started choking the crap outta me.
Thankfully, I got fingers under the cord so I wouldn't pass out right away, but I realized that there was nothing I could do to get her to let go without hurting her, so I just kept trying to stand up (she grabbed it when I was leaning over the bed) hoping she'd get tired and let go.
Now, while this is happening I can hear several people behind me laughing, and little tidbits of conversation like "should we help?" and "he's gonna get choked out by a 90yo" which was super not helpful.
This will disappoint some here I'm sure, but she's didn't choke me out, she got tired and let go of the lanyard......
........and instantly grabbed my junk, at which point I almost hit the ceiling while yelping in an octave only dogs could hear.
I then made my move, free at last, and spun around and dashed right into the fuucking door, that someone had slid half, shut face first, which caused devil granny to join my co-workers laughing.
Yeah, I wear a breakaway lanyard now if I'm at the hospital......
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Dec 2016
Posts: 5,510
Campfire Tracker
|
|
Campfire Tracker
Joined: Dec 2016
Posts: 5,510 |
A woman can be an enemy as well as any man and most of them can be even more viscous.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 32,130 Likes: 1
Campfire 'Bwana
|
|
Campfire 'Bwana
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 32,130 Likes: 1 |
On the funny ass-whupp'n side of things, when I was a new nurse on night shift I thought I was too cool to wear the break-away name badge/ID lanyard. I was climbing a lot back then, and used a piece of spectra cord.
When co-workers told me it was dumb, I was all macho "It ain't no big deal"
Then one night a confused, septic little old lady, maybe 105 pounds dripping wet, grabbed that thing and started choking the crap outta me.
Thankfully, I got fingers under the cord so I wouldn't pass out right away, but I realized that there was nothing I could do to get her to let go without hurting her, so I just kept trying to stand up (she grabbed it when I was leaning over the bed) hoping she'd get tired and let go.
Now, while this is happening I can hear several people behind me laughing, and little tidbits of conversation like "should we help?" and "he's gonna get choked out by a 90yo" which was super not helpful.
This will disappoint some here I'm sure, but she's didn't choke me out, she got tired and let go of the lanyard......
........and instantly grabbed my junk, at which point I almost hit the ceiling while yelping in an octave only dogs could hear.
I then made my move, free at last, and spun around and dashed right into the fuucking door, that someone had slid half, shut face first, which caused devil granny to join my co-workers laughing.
Yeah, I wear a breakaway lanyard now if I'm at the hospital......
ROFLMFAO
If you put Taco Bell sauce in your ramen noodles it tastes just like poverty
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 31,625 Likes: 5
Campfire 'Bwana
|
|
Campfire 'Bwana
Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 31,625 Likes: 5 |
"It’s been my experience a woman will cut your throat just as fast as any Comanche warrior."
Capt. Augustus McCrae.
Founder
Ancient Order of the 1895 Winchester
"Come, shall we go and kill us venison?
And yet it irks me the poor dappled fools,
Being native burghers of this desert city,
Should in their own confines with forked heads
Have their round haunches gored."
WS
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Dec 2015
Posts: 8,069
Campfire Outfitter
|
|
Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Dec 2015
Posts: 8,069 |
On the funny ass-whupp'n side of things, when I was a new nurse on night shift I thought I was too cool to wear the break-away name badge/ID lanyard. I was climbing a lot back then, and used a piece of spectra cord.
When co-workers told me it was dumb, I was all macho "It ain't no big deal"
Then one night a confused, septic little old lady, maybe 105 pounds dripping wet, grabbed that thing and started choking the crap outta me.
Thankfully, I got fingers under the cord so I wouldn't pass out right away, but I realized that there was nothing I could do to get her to let go without hurting her, so I just kept trying to stand up (she grabbed it when I was leaning over the bed) hoping she'd get tired and let go.
Now, while this is happening I can hear several people behind me laughing, and little tidbits of conversation like "should we help?" and "he's gonna get choked out by a 90yo" which was super not helpful.
This will disappoint some here I'm sure, but she's didn't choke me out, she got tired and let go of the lanyard......
........and instantly grabbed my junk, at which point I almost hit the ceiling while yelping in an octave only dogs could hear.
I then made my move, free at last, and spun around and dashed right into the fuucking door, that someone had slid half, shut face first, which caused devil granny to join my co-workers laughing.
Yeah, I wear a breakaway lanyard now if I'm at the hospital......
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Dec 2005
Posts: 13,061 Likes: 5
Campfire Outfitter
|
|
Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Dec 2005
Posts: 13,061 Likes: 5 |
Once she physically assaulted me, game on.
No one should hit anyone. It’s just stupid. Now the Feds are going to be all over her because of this.
In today’s day and age, with all the trouble they’ve had with the airlines, it would be easier to get off of bank robbery then it would be for something done in the air.
"...aspire to live quietly, and to mind your own affairs, and to work with your hands, as we instructed you, so that you may walk properly before outsiders and be dependent on no one." - Paul to the church in Thessalonica.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 69,420 Likes: 12
Campfire Kahuna
|
|
Campfire Kahuna
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 69,420 Likes: 12 |
All rules are out the window when you have to defend yourself from a man dressed like a woman. Can't tell the difference? Assume you're right and swing.
“In a time of deceit telling the truth is a revolutionary act.”
― George Orwell
It's not over when you lose. It's over when you quit.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Mar 2019
Posts: 584
Campfire Regular
|
|
Campfire Regular
Joined: Mar 2019
Posts: 584 |
EXACTLY my first thought reading the title. I would have beaten that woman's face off if she spit in my face like that.
""Mute the Greeniacs. Open the pipeline. Bury the Russians." - JPR - 2022
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2019
Posts: 4,864 Likes: 6
Campfire Tracker
|
|
Campfire Tracker
Joined: Apr 2019
Posts: 4,864 Likes: 6 |
On the funny ass-whupp'n side of things, when I was a new nurse on night shift I thought I was too cool to wear the break-away name badge/ID lanyard. I was climbing a lot back then, and used a piece of spectra cord.
When co-workers told me it was dumb, I was all macho "It ain't no big deal"
Then one night a confused, septic little old lady, maybe 105 pounds dripping wet, grabbed that thing and started choking the crap outta me.
Thankfully, I got fingers under the cord so I wouldn't pass out right away, but I realized that there was nothing I could do to get her to let go without hurting her, so I just kept trying to stand up (she grabbed it when I was leaning over the bed) hoping she'd get tired and let go.
Now, while this is happening I can hear several people behind me laughing, and little tidbits of conversation like "should we help?" and "he's gonna get choked out by a 90yo" which was super not helpful.
This will disappoint some here I'm sure, but she's didn't choke me out, she got tired and let go of the lanyard......
........and instantly grabbed my junk, at which point I almost hit the ceiling while yelping in an octave only dogs could hear.
I then made my move, free at last, and spun around and dashed right into the fuucking door, that someone had slid half, shut face first, which caused devil granny to join my co-workers laughing.
Yeah, I wear a breakaway lanyard now if I'm at the hospital......
And a cup?
|
|
|
|
|
641 members (1936M71, 1Longbow, 16penny, 10gaugemag, 1badf350, 68 invisible),
2,650
guests, and
1,244
robots. |
|
Key:
Admin,
Global Mod,
Mod
|
|
|
Forums81
Topics1,192,946
Posts18,498,979
Members73,983
| |
Most Online11,491
Jul 7th, 2023
|
|
|
|
