As with many of you, my father died of cancer, in his case, pancreatic. He's been gone 21 years now. My parents had been married 49 years. Mom took care of dad as he slowly degraded until she needed help from hospice. All three of us kids did what we could to help, as we had all stayed nearby. Mom was in her 60's at that time. Of course it was terrible and hard on us all, but especially her. She was home with dad when he reached his hands up high in the air while laying in bed, as if reaching for something unseen, and breathing his last breath. He'd been sick 7 months and bed-ridden and mute for three weeks. I was there within a few minutes, and held my dads hand as his body began to cool off.
I remember it like it was yesterday. I was holding his hand, when all of a sudden I kind of recoiled, sat up straight, let go of his hand and said, "That's not my dad!" I still believe to this day I felt his spirit leave his body. His pain was over, and for that we were thankful at least.
She remarried a few years later and has been married a dozen years or so. Jim's been a great stepfather to me, and husband to my mom. He's in his 90's but he's just "Jim", fully in possession of all his faculties. We have great conversations on all sorts of deep topics and he's got a great sense of humor. He has become a very dear friend and trusted mentor. Up until last week he walked a couple miles a day, with a walker in their little gated community. He and mom decided Jim would go see his kids for a few days while mom dealt with a flooring contractor replacing the carpet in their house with hardwood. Jim gets upset when he questions why this or that is done a certain way. LOL. They thought it would be easier if Jim visited family and mom handled the contractors.
He came home yesterday complaining of back pain and by last night they had to get him to the hospital.
Today we learned that Jim has Stage Four pancreatic cancer and has a few months to live. Jim has been preparing for years to meet the Lord, downsizing houses and getting rid of "stuff", setting up the finances and so forth as best as he could for the eventuality that he would leave my mom widowed again.
My mom called crying and struggled to tell us. I worry for her now that she's in her mid 80's. There's no way she can physically handle this again, and emotionally I worry for her as Jim has been a very in-charge and strong husband figure in her life. She has really learned to depend on him for everything.
My mom has another tough road ahead of her. Very heartbroken for her as I write this. I live 200 miles away and am not going to be able to be available like I was when dad passed. I pray Jims family can step in. I wonder what I should do. How I can best support them from afar. I'm self-employed so I can shut it down and go at some point, but I do have financial responsibilities at home.
Damn it. It feels like cancer is taking someone before their time. Must sound strange saying that about someone in their 90's, but Jim isn't old to me, he's just "Jim", my stepfather and good friend. The world's about to get a little bit smaller as we lose another great one.
Please say a prayer for our family if you wouldn't mind. Going to be a tough road for mom.
Of course Roy, May our Lord Jesus give you all the strength, and courage to fight through this.
Ditto ^^^^^
At least the two kinds I've had have been operable.
FB2, Good thoughts going out to your family. And may Jim get through this as painlessly as possible.
I am sorry to hear of your stepfather's very serious condition. Best wishes to him, your mother, and you. All of my family are gone now, except an older brother who is in ill health so I know how it hurts when a close loved one dies.
Take care of your mother the best you can, when you can. That's all you can do.
L.W.
Prayers for peace and comfort Roy, for your family and you.
Prayers sent from here.
Cancer is evil.
I had a customer get cancer a long time ago. He walked out of the house one morning, found a stop sign, sat down against the post and slit his wrists. It was devastating to his wife. He didn't want to put her through having to care for him, but talking to her afterwards I can see that she felt worse about his suicide than she did about having to care for him.
I wonder what I'd do if I got sick with it? I sure wouldn't want my family to have to go though it, but the time spent with them at the end is too valuable to just throw away. I'd be tempted to skydive w/o a parachute but for the people I left behind.
You're right, cancer stinks.
Sorry to hear about your pal Roy.
Prayers for Jim and his family.
Pancreatic cancer took out my dad. It was a horrible way to go. I was there, doing what I could.
Best wishes for you and your mom.
Sorry to hear of her struggles and yours.
After your first paragraph is was thinking, wow the year that would of been their 70th anniversary, this might be tough on her. I had no Idea.....
Prosciutto Jim's family maybe? In the theme of I am a resource as I have been through what you are going to experience?
It's worth the chance that you will be their first call when they have a personal crisis...
I'd take him to the Mayo Clinic and get a real opinion.
I doubt that diagnosis was given by anybody worth a fugk in their profession.
I wish scientist could figure out how to beat that disease. Its a curse on mankind
I'd take him to the Mayo Clinic and get a real opinion.
I doubt that diagnosis was given by anybody worth a fugk in their profession.
Honest question.
Do you think there is a doctor somewhere that would fight for a mans life in their 90's with stage 4 cancer? I honestly don't know. I could add he's beaten other types of cancer at least three times before! Super positive, move forward kind of guy.
As with many of you, my father died of cancer, in his case, pancreatic. He's been gone 21 years now. My parents had been married 49 years. Mom took care of dad as he slowly degraded until she needed help from hospice. All three of us kids did what we could to help, as we had all stayed nearby. Mom was in her 60's at that time. Of course it was terrible and hard on us all, but especially her. She was home with dad when he reached his hands up high in the air while laying in bed, as if reaching for something unseen, and breathing his last breath. He'd been sick 7 months and bed-ridden and mute for three weeks. I was there within a few minutes, and held my dads hand as his body began to cool off.
I remember it like it was yesterday. I was holding his hand, when all of a sudden I kind of recoiled, sat up straight, let go of his hand and said, "That's not my dad!" I still believe to this day I felt his spirit leave his body. His pain was over, and for that we were thankful at least.
She remarried a few years later and has been married a dozen years or so. Jim's been a great stepfather to me, and husband to my mom. He's in his 90's but he's just "Jim", fully in possession of all his faculties. We have great conversations on all sorts of deep topics and he's got a great sense of humor. He has become a very dear friend and trusted mentor. Up until last week he walked a couple miles a day, with a walker in their little gated community. He and mom decided Jim would go see his kids for a few days while mom dealt with a flooring contractor replacing the carpet in their house with hardwood. Jim gets upset when he questions why this or that is done a certain way. LOL. They thought it would be easier if Jim visited family and mom handled the contractors.
He came home yesterday complaining of back pain and by last night they had to get him to the hospital.
Today we learned that Jim has Stage Four pancreatic cancer and has a few months to live. Jim has been preparing for years to meet the Lord, downsizing houses and getting rid of "stuff", setting up the finances and so forth as best as he could for the eventuality that he would leave my mom widowed again.
My mom called crying and struggled to tell us. I worry for her now that she's in her mid 80's. There's no way she can physically handle this again, and emotionally I worry for her as Jim has been a very in-charge and strong husband figure in her life. She has really learned to depend on him for everything.
My mom has another tough road ahead of her. Very heartbroken for her as I write this. I live 200 miles away and am not going to be able to be available like I was when dad passed. I pray Jims family can step in. I wonder what I should do. How I can best support them from afar. I'm self-employed so I can shut it down and go at some point, but I do have financial responsibilities at home.
Damn it. It feels like cancer is taking someone before their time. Must sound strange saying that about someone in their 90's, but Jim isn't old to me, he's just "Jim", my stepfather and good friend. The world's about to get a little bit smaller as we lose another great one.
Please say a prayer for our family if you wouldn't mind. Going to be a tough road for mom.
I'm sure sorry to hear this, Roy. It sounds like Jim had a good run, but that doesn't make things easier for him, or you, or your mom.
I'd take him to the Mayo Clinic and get a real opinion.
I doubt that diagnosis was given by anybody worth a fugk in their profession.
Honest question.
Do you think there is a doctor somewhere that would fight for a mans life in their 90's with stage 4 cancer? I honestly don't know. I could add he's beaten other types of cancer at least three times before! Super positive, move forward kind of guy.
No idea.
I’m sorry to hear of that, that type of cancer has taken several people I know. It has to be hell on your mom.
I dropped 100% of everything in mid February to care for my dad... he passed...
I am 100% with my mother now... she is in the final weeks, days... hours in her losing battle with Pancreatic cancer.
A life with few regrets is a good life.
A life with no regrets is a perfect life.
I have had many regrets in my life... but hope to add no more.
I sincerely Pray the same for each of you.
I dropped 100% of everything in mid February to care for my dad... he passed...
I am 100% with my mother now... she is in the final weeks, days... hours in her losing battle with Pancreatic cancer.
A life with few regrets is a good life.
A life with no regrets is a perfect life.
I have had many regrets in my life... but hope to add no more.
I sincerely Pray the same for each of you.
24 Hour Campfire has been a Blessed distraction.
Deacon DeFlave (...and others) have sustained me from deep dark rabbit holes...
‐--------------------
Best of luck to you...
...and in truthful loving honesty... GFY to the rest of you.
I'm not a big believer in beating cancer. My take is if you survive treatment live you were mis diagnosed. Cancer is a money making disease for everyone involved besides the family. And the family will do whatever it can to to cure the sick member. I think there's already a cure for cancer and the elite are protecting their investment. A license to steal.
Dam sorry to hear this Roy ,Prayers sent!
That's rough. Sorry to hear that your Mom has to go through all that again. Prayers sent to you and yours.
when my mom got cancer, I enclosed my garage added a full bath and a bedroom for her and my dad. My wife doesn't work so she was here to take care of her while my dad was working. She lasted 7 yrs, no cure for multiple myeloma, that was 6 yrs ago my dad still lives with us. He has prostate cancer and is being treated for it, he's 82 now and still works. Have any idea if you can move them in with you, but I'm glad I did.
I’m sorry to hear of this. Going through this once is bad enough......dealing with the same cancer is hard to fathom! Prayers for Jim, yourself and your families! memtb
Over the last 35 years or so, I have lost beloved family members and friends to pancreatic cancer. The only good (?) aspect of it is that it usually doesn't take long to prove fatal.
Prayers and offered for you, your family and friends. I absolutely hate the damned stuff!
https://www.sanoviv.com/this place has kept my sister in law alive for 25 years with multiple cancers not cured but held at bay.
Pancreatic is a rough one.
my heart goes out to you Roy. my mother passed in 1988 in mill city. i was in business and working for the Sheriff's dept in LA at the time. shut down my contracting, closed my gun shop, took a leave from the dept, and went and cared for mom and dad. tough year but i would give anything to do it again as both are long gone. had some of the closest times of our lives those last few months.
it may seem like you are sacrificing everything to go help but the gain out weighed all the "loss".
may God give peace and comfort to you all. God bless my friend.
Pancreatic got Grammys 3rd husband.
Good guy.
Dunno what cancer got #2.
#1 got smoked in a fiery truck crash when my mom was little.
Grammy lived to about 90, had leukemia and justbsaid ahe was ready, quit treatments.
Good Christian lady that was ready to go.
Did say #3 had pancreatic but for some reason his last months were pain free.......a blessing.
He was a good dude
Even when things are bad sometimes things work out kinda sorta.
Just relaying that.
Fake deacon you have no idea what you're talking about in this instance so STFU with the stupid remarks. Wish the man, his family and his father the best and offer a prayer.
Fake deacon you have no idea what you're talking about in this instance so STFU with the stupid remarks. Wish the man, his family and his father the best and offer a prayer.
You're right and I apologize.
Fireballz,
Good luck with your incurable situation.
Best wishes.
I'd take him to the Mayo Clinic and get a real opinion.
I doubt that diagnosis was given by anybody worth a fugk in their profession.
I have a friend who was set to fly from Albuquerque to the Mayo Clinic in Phoenix this past Wednesday and got word the day before that due to corona influx, all noncritical admissions had been cancelled.
Fireball2, I'm sorry about your bad news.
Norm
I'd take him to the Mayo Clinic and get a real opinion.
I doubt that diagnosis was given by anybody worth a fugk in their profession.
Honest question.
Do you think there is a doctor somewhere that would fight for a mans life in their 90's with stage 4 cancer? I honestly don't know. I could add he's beaten other types of cancer at least three times before! Super positive, move forward kind of guy.
Best of luck to all of you.
dang sorry to read this, and without a doubt, you have my support and prayers.
Prayers sent from here.
Cancer is evil.
Ditto.
I just posted this on my Facebook page.
"A true story that happened just now... for people that do not believe in God.
Haven't been able to get out much, taking care of my mom and family and all... walked down to the pier with Laura to pull the crab pots. They have not been baited in 2 weeks... just sitting in the water empty... plan to wash them this week.
Walking to the pier I thought how nice it would be to go fishing and catch some fresh rockfish.
We pulled the four pots and they contained 5 fresh rockfish, 7 nice crabs and for dessert... one soft shell.
Once again, thank you Jesus!
I swear every word of this to be the Gospel truth."
Roy... the best you can... and you will never have to look back in any way but happiness.
Prayers for you and yours.
Of course Roy, May our Lord Jesus give you all the strength, and courage to fight through this.
This.
My condolences to your family and his family as well.
FB, prayers from Colorado. Just..... Damn.
Fuggin' cancer.
Prayers for you all, from us in N.C.
I lost my dad the same way in '03.
Roy, I wish for peace, strength and positive energy your way.
FB, prayers from Colorado. Just..... Damn.
Fuggin' cancer.
What is "Just.... Damn"
About that?
He's in his 90's
What is "Just.... Damn"
About that?
Roy's father's suffering, Roy's pain, and the family pain and loss.
PRICK.
He's in his 90's
What is "Just.... Damn"
About that?
Roy's father's suffering, Roy's pain, and the family pain and loss.
PRICK.
Step father.
Why go online posting "feel sorry for me" [bleep] anyway?
Then again, you're the guy that posted "me and the wife cuddled up drinking dessert coffee" posts.
He's in his 90's
What is "Just.... Damn"
About that?
Roy's father's suffering, Roy's pain, and the family pain and loss.
PRICK.
PUTZ.
Latte: X-tra steamed milk.
Jackmountain and add chitting on a thread where everyone else is offering condolences for someone who has suffered a loss.
#truecolors
He's in his 90's
What is "Just.... Damn"
About that?
Roy's father's suffering, Roy's pain, and the family pain and loss.
PRICK.
Step father.
Why go online posting "feel sorry for me" [bleep] anyway?
Then again, you're the guy that posted "me and the wife cuddled up drinking dessert coffee" posts.
Firball2 and duck911 are related. Have to be
He's in his 90's
What is "Just.... Damn"
About that?
Roy's father's suffering, Roy's pain, and the family pain and loss.
PRICK.
PUTZ.
Latte: X-tra steamed milk.
With cinnamon sprinkles
Sounds like Jim has lived a good life. Hope he gets through this as painless and with the least amount of discomfort possible. Prayers for all involved.
Good life or not cancer is not the way to go. I’m sorry for ANYONE facing this end, and for all of those around them.
Lost my dad in ‘03 to the same thing, and it was the only time I had any regrets about moving to this country. Very difficult being 6,000miles away and not able to help, other than phone calls. I decided to take three weeks off near the end and spent it with him. Very glad I did that, but the price was missing the funeral.
Cancer sucks.
The only advice I can give is to burn up the phone lines with your mom, and make sure she also has the physical assistance she will need. It’s going to be a rough ride to the finish.
A rough road ahead. Wishing the best for your Mom and step dad.
Sounds like he’s lived a good life with your mom.
Some of you are either bipolar or alcoholics.
Some of you are either bipolar or alcoholics.
Or both...