Home Forums Hunting & Shooting Hunter's Campfire Was my Appalachian family typical.

My dad was a drunk, a gambler and a womanizer. I worshiped him.

I saw a video of a ghetto mother whoopin' her teen age son with a belt. Hailed as a stern mother, that's all good, right? No, it's not. To me dad should be whoopin' him.


My parents came out of the mountains around Grundy Virginia in the mid 50's. My sister was born in Virginia in 1955 just before they moved. My older brother in 1957, me in 1959 and my younger brother in 1961. My parents essentially stayed in that Appalachian mindset as much as the could their entire life. They associated with Appalachian people mostly, others more distantly.

From birth until 9-10 years old us boys belonged to mom, nurturing and discipline, dad only whooped us occasionally. At 9-10 we became dad's. Big program change, the nurturing part was over for the most part and dad owned your azz. Discipline was hard, being with dad was like walking on egg shells. He didn't use a belt or paddle, he had a 5 foot hickory switch that he peeled, fire hardened and rubbed down with linseed oil. That thing would raise welts through your clothes and on bare skin could make you bleed a bit. Dad used to say, " This house is mine, that dog is mine and you are mine."

We started working with him at 9 years old. Every summer, after school sometimes, and every Saturday. He was a residential building contractor. On the job discipline was with a 4-5 foot 2x4. By the time I was 13 I was expected to know the tasks I was given and to do a man's days labor. The good side of that is when I was 16 I went to another contractor and made $7 and hour. $7 and hour for a 16 year old in 1976 was damn good money.

At 16 one evening at dinner I told my dad, " Monday I'm starting with Bob Masley" . I had expected to take a bit of a whoopin', didn't happen, but I was determined I would go no matter what. My dad said, " Did I say you could get another job?" I said "Nope" looking right at him. He just said, " You better work good for Bob." You see, in our family a son could tarnish the fathers name and his reputation.

So how does that stack up against how you other Appalachian guys were raised.

That actually doesn't sound too far off of the way the ancient Spartans raised their sons.

I respected my dad so much that he didn't have to whip me. All he had to do is look at me with disgust and I was shamed and sorry. He did spank me a couple of times when I was young, but it didn't do much. They knew things I considered punishment, such as staying inside instead of playing with my buddies, and that was worse than whipping to me. Oh yeah....we are from a long line of mountain folks. I spent my life trying to be like Dad, and raise my kids the same way he did. It has worked so far!

My dad was a drunk, a gambler and a womanizer. I worshiped him.

Discipline or child abuse? If someone struck my child w/ a closed fist or a 2x4 I would kill them. Were I to do the same thing to my kids I would deserve the same treatment. Children that are abused frequently visit the same treatment on their children.

Kids deserve the opportunity to learn to excel, that is best taught in the home by example. To equate brutality w/ discipline is ignorance.


mike r