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Joined: May 2005
Posts: 10,452
Campfire Outfitter
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OP
Campfire Outfitter
Joined: May 2005
Posts: 10,452 |
1. FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER.
8-years old. Hateful little bastard. Bites!
2. FREE PUPPIES:
1/2 Cocker Spaniel, 1/2 sneaky neighbor's dog.
3. FREE PUPPIES..
Mother, AKC German Shepherd.
Father, Super Dog. Able to leap tall fences in a single bound.
4. FOUND DIRTY WHITE DOG.
Looks like a rat. Been out a while.
Better be a big reward.
5. COWS, CALVES: NEVER BRED.
Also 1 gay bull for sale.
6. NORDIC TRACK
$300 Hardly used, call Chubby.
7. GEORGIA PEACHES
California grown - 89 cents/lb.
8. JOINING NUDIST COLONY!
Must sell washer and dryer $300.
9. WEDDING DRESS FOR SALE.
Worn once by mistake. Call Stephanie.
And the best one?:
10. FOR SALE BY OWNER:
Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica, 45 volumes. Excellent condition.
$1,000 or best offer. No longer needed,
Got married last month. Wife knows everything.
"Civilized men are more discourteous than savages because they know they can be impolite without having their skulls split, as a general thing."
Robert E. Howard
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Joined: Sep 2007
Posts: 3,278
Campfire Tracker
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Campfire Tracker
Joined: Sep 2007
Posts: 3,278 |
Saw this one in the Las Vegas classifieds:
For Sale- Tanning booth, exc. cond., selling to pay for skin cancer treatments.
Eagles may soar, but a weasel never got sucked into a jet turbine!
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Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 24,851
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 24,851 |
#10 is my favorite. 
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Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 17,278
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 17,278 |
I like the one that goes:
FOR SALE: Parachute. Used once. Never opened. Small stain.
"But whether the Constitution really be one thing, or another, this much is certain--that it has either authorized such a government as we have had, or has been powerless to prevent it. In either case, it is unfit to exist." --Lysander Spooner, 1867
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 16,032
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 16,032 |
There was one in our little weekly paper last week that read:
FOR Sale: Half bored goats.
(Pretty sure they meant Borer but could be correct as written.)
BCR
Quando Omni Moritati
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Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 4,825
Campfire Tracker
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Campfire Tracker
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 4,825 |
Too many people buy stuff they don't want, with money they don't have, to impress people they don't like!
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Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 15,652 Likes: 3
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 15,652 Likes: 3 |
There was one in our little weekly paper last week that read:
FOR Sale: Half bored goats.
(Pretty sure they meant Borer but could be correct as written.)
BCR Probably meant Boer goats Boggy...
- Greg
Success is found at the intersection of planning, hard work, and stubbornness.
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Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 7,954 Likes: 5
Campfire Outfitter
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Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 7,954 Likes: 5 |
I saw this one once:
10 guage single shot, cheap. Fired once.
Most people don't really want the truth.
They just want constant reassurance that what they believe is the truth.
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Joined: Mar 2006
Posts: 10,262
Campfire Outfitter
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Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Mar 2006
Posts: 10,262 |
I like the ads selling Mouser rifles.
I saw a movie where only the military and the police had guns. It was called Schindler's List.
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Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 17,248 Likes: 1
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 17,248 Likes: 1 |
Or dooley pickups, or Chevy Blaziers, or Datsun puppies.
Now with even more aplomb
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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 44,887 Likes: 11
Campfire 'Bwana
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Campfire 'Bwana
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 44,887 Likes: 11 |
Or Forester dies and scopes with turrents.
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Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 24,851
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 24,851 |
Or when they write...."for sell"
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Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 69,475 Likes: 18
Campfire Kahuna
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Campfire Kahuna
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 69,475 Likes: 18 |
I've seen a few ads for trucks with a wench on the front bumper. After a few miles in the back country, she's probably mean enough to pick the truck up and throw it out of the mud.
“In a time of deceit telling the truth is a revolutionary act.”
― George Orwell
It's not over when you lose. It's over when you quit.
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Joined: Oct 2008
Posts: 18,178
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Oct 2008
Posts: 18,178 |
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 9,100
Campfire Outfitter
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Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 9,100 |
Whenever I go to a truck stop dinner and the waitress tells me they have "homade pies" I want to ask "which ho made em".
"The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing."
Edmund Burke 1795
"Give me liberty or give me death"
Patrick Henry 1775
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Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 38,926 Likes: 11
Campfire 'Bwana
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Campfire 'Bwana
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 38,926 Likes: 11 |
"Ithica" shotgun for sale
Not a real member - just an ordinary guy who appreciates being able to hang around and say something once in awhile.
Happily Trapped In the Past (Thanks, Joe)
Not only a less than minimally educated person, but stupid and out of touch as well.
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Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 12,397 Likes: 1
Campfire Outfitter
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Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 12,397 Likes: 1 |
Saw one for free puppies. Mother was a black lab and daddy was a fence jumper. Looking at the pups I gambled that daddy just might also be a black lab. Wrong, wrong wrong. That black lab female got so darn big that daddy had to be a Great Dane. That dog stood about three feet at the shoulder and her head was at least 9" wide. We let her go to a ranch that wanted a few "big" dogs.
She did retrieve all right but then she'd run off and eat the birds. I couldn't break her of it so off to the ranch she went.
Paul B.
Our forefathers did not politely protest the British.They did not vote them out of office, nor did they impeach the king,march on the capitol or ask permission for their rights. ----------------They just shot them.
MOLON LABE
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Joined: Apr 2008
Posts: 308
Campfire Member
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Campfire Member
Joined: Apr 2008
Posts: 308 |
FOR SALE: Authentic French Army rifle. Good condition- dropped once, NEVER fired.
"Those who expect to reap the blessings of freedom, must like men, undergo the fatigues of supporting it." Thomas Paine
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 5,611
Campfire Tracker
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Campfire Tracker
Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 5,611 |
I saw an ad for a 30-06 with scope, like new, in box, two boxes of ammunition less 8 rounds fired. The price was cheap, very cheap.
The owner lived in a high rise downtown. Hmmm. Tall, lean young man. My mind kept asking, "Why is he selling it so cheap?" As I picked up the rifle he asked, "Have you ever shot one of these?"
"Yes," I replied.
"Well," he said, "I want you to know that this one REALLY KICKS."
Hmmm. He told me he was a an indoor .22 target shooter and had bought the 06 on impluse, an impuse he obviously regretted.
I said that I'd take it but before I could fish out my money, he hesitated and said, "I just want to be sure that you realize this rifle REALLY, REALLY KICKS."
Mystery solved as to why he was getting rid of it!
Last edited by Okanagan; 05/19/09.
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Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 133
Campfire Member
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Campfire Member
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 133 |
Someone here was selling two cemetery plots and caskets, "never used".
Whatever doesn't kill you will make you stronger. Right up until it kills you.
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