Home Forums Hunting & Shooting Hunter's Campfire Bruise Question

Can you make bruises go away?
I need them gone in 3 days...
HELP!!!!!

Makeup

Prom pictures?

sure it's not a hickie?

Not the answer I'm look'n for.

Not really explainable....

In all seriousness though, if you have a wagreens or CVS handy you can get some of the "super blue stuff" or "blue emu oil". I have had good luck with that.

all kidding aside whole foods has something call scar-go----works pretty good for bruises as well. And apply ice packs and then heat 48 hours later. Lay off any meds that thin blood like aspirin and Ibuprofren.

My mom used to use vinegar. But then she used it for everything...

Good luck..

ain't gonna work Bart and I understand your dilemma really well.


trying to juggle two or more felines is more art than science.


your best bet is to go see the other one and whack her hard right off the bat, no hello, kisses or nuthin, just bust her, not hard enough to hurt her, just pizz her off.


let her beat the chit outa you and you claim those bruises are ones she gave you.


oh btw you're welcome

A bruise is blood seepage underneath your skin. Time is the only way to get rid of it. Maybe a cold pack will help, at least it might keep it from getting bigger.

Back a long time ago, they used to reccommend putting a steak on your eye for a shiner. I guess because it was cold, but I don't know if it helped. It was on The Little Rascals and other kid movies so it must work.

The answer is: hide it in plain sight. IOW, make it worse with more bruising or an added abrasion or contusion (as required by your specific condition/circumstance you may or may not need to add 'supporting' wounds in places other than the one in question). Done properly so that the explanation of said injury is logical and indisputable, voila, the once incriminating condition disappears in the fog of the other boo boo. Problem solved. Classic distraction tactic. You're welcome.

Leeches!

Good idea from lhonda! Get a police report describing how you battled off the thugs trying to mug that little Granma crossing the street. Beat yo'ownsef with a stick to cover up the existing bruises...

Next time wear velveted handcuffs....Good luck!

P.S. Here's the other part: 'Baby I'm ashamed to admit it but the truth is that I missed you so much I guess I went and overdid it with the booze the other night. What with all the loneliness and all, I just had a moment of weakness. I'm only human, after all. Anyway, I guess halfway through the night I musta' gotten up out of bed with a screaming case of the hungry horrors or dehydration, and on my way to the kitchen the damned dog ran in front of my stagger and I fell into the tool box/coat rack/dining table...'

Man, you guys are cold!!

Arnica cream from your health food store is about as good as there is. Probably won't be quite as quick as you're wanting, but it does help a lot.

Just in case anyone is looking for a way of creating bruises, I have a helpful suggestion. Take one lawn mower with a loose blade. Pull back sharply on the starter cord. With any luck at all, it will come part way and then be ripped from your grasp. If things work out well, you will be jerked forward before losing your grip on the t-handle. At this point, should good fortune continue to shine upon you, the cord will whip around a cross-member on the mower handle with the aforementioned t-handle spinning around and striking you in the chest. The period of time spent in a bent-over position with your hands on your knees while you wait for the pain to subside can be spent in anticipation of a truly magnificent bruise to form. Patience is of the essence here as it will take a few days to achieve the full richness of color, but the wait is well worth it. Hopefully this will be of help to someone. Best to all, John

Dang it hurts to be kicked 'there' don't it

Just tell her, "Not tonight, I have a headache".

Be careful dude, I think David Carradine went out that way...

5sdad, I had one several years ago similar to that. My dad is the dumbest person I know. That being said, he is also a rancher. That means that a cow is more important than anything. He had a place in N.D. several years ago that used to be a horse ranch. That means no corrals for cattle, just horses. Definitely different purposes for each kind of enclosure. Good cattle can be worked very easily with a good set-up, and it's a mightmare without. Big, long pens with no small areas don't mix, especially with a yearling bull. Dad wanted to take the horns off this Hereford, so there I was roping him as he went by. After I got the rope on him (no horse), I still had to get him tied off. On one lap I managed to get the end of the 30' nylon around a post, but just barely. All I had was the last 10 inches in my hand and only 3/4 of a wrap. As the bull went by, I had to duck under the rope, and that put a lot of pressure on the end in my hand. When it came loose, with the rope at nearly full stretch, I was stending up again right next to the post. The knot on that rope came around at about mach 2 and caught me just inside the shoulder on the pec. I went down on my knees for a few seconds and never saw a thing. One second the rope is in my hands, the next, a lot of pain! We finally got him tied up and the job done, but I still wear a scar from that one. I asked dad when he was going to build some decent pens, and he replied he didn't think there was any problem with these! you story brought back quite a memory. Jeff.