Home Forums Hunting & Shooting Ask The Gunwriters "Interesting" conversation with a new clerk at LGS

One of my favorite gun shop idiot stories:
The man has his scope mounted by the gun shop idiot who obviously put the wrong bases on the gun. When the gun owner asked why the bases were daylighted from the receiver top on his new Rem 700, the idiot replied, "You want them that way for tension. It keeps the screws tight. If the bases were flush with the receiver deck the screws would shear off the first time you fired it."

The new gun owner looked at me and said, "Man, that guy really knows his stuff."

If he didn't have a B-29 maybe he had an understudy rifle in .29 Hornet with an Ackley Improved 40-degree shoulder. What we say and write haunt us.....

I love reading stories like this. You laugh. You moan. You cringe.

At Epps Sporting Goods - founded and owned for many years by Ellwood Epps, creator of the Epps line of improved cartridges - a dullard that worked there told a customer that the 303 Epps conversion was not safe for the No 1 Lee Enfield, only the No 4.

If you are unfamiliar with Lee Enfield rifles, they fired the 303 British cartridge. The No 1 is simply an older version of a rifle that was created specifically to fire the 303 cartridge.

The customer turned to me and asked if that was true. I said no, that the 303 Epps generates the same pressure as the parent cartridge, the 303 British. The gun shop employee looked over his glasses at me and said, "And who are you, Steve Redgwell?"

The customer and I looked at each other and cracked up. The reason? My book was displayed on the counter, barely a foot away from the clerk, with my picture on the back cover, facing him. I was even wearing the same hat as in the photo.

We need more stories!

Well, now that you mention it...I nearly had a free Westley Richards .500 Nitro Express last weekend.

Well, almost free, just a missing "9" on the end of the price tag.

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True story - I stop in Cabelas to use a gift cert, and browse through the "Gun Library". I've seen the rifle before, and admired it, but knew it was $30k+ and didn't even bother handling it.

Today I notice the price tag reads, $3499.99 Hmmm.

A guy standing next to me says, "that's a real buy, but the bores aren't so good."

Well, I handle, open it, and sho 'nuff the bores are a little dark, but still very usable, especially for a .500 NE. I walk into their office:

Me: "this the right price?"

Salesman: (looks at the tag) "Yes, that's it"

Me: "okay, I'll take it"

Salesman: "great, have a seat, and I'll start writing it up!"

I sit down, note that the guy is starting to get a funny look on his face. I remember the story of the guy who withdrew $100 from an ATM, but was dispensed a bunch more, didn't report it, and had the law after him.

I mentally sigh, and say, "You sure that price tag isn't missing a digit?"

Salesman: "Yes, it's $34,999"

Me: "That's not what the price tag says"

Salesman: "ahhhmmm...going to fix that right now!"

I laugh and tell him no, I can't take it. Somewhere I bet there's some long-dead Westley Richards craftsman, laughing their ass off.

Most expensive gun in the store, and they lose a digit on the price tag

Fortunately, my LGS is a one-man shop owned and operated by a local rancher who uses it as a way to support his addiction to buying, selling and shooting firearms. He is only open a couple of days a week these days, but the shop is packed on the days that he is open.

He owns, and has shot, way more guns than I ever will. It is almost impossible to stump him on cartridges and the rifles or handguns for which they are chambered. He also knows everyone in southwestern New Mexico and southeastern Arizona. When people have guns to sell, they take them to Bill or call him, as he doesn't take advantage of anyone. He gets the damnedest stuff out of estates, and he has one hell of a collection.

He has traded me out of a couple of rifles that I would dearly love to get back. My only hope is to outlive him and buy them back out of his personal stash from his son who is his only heir.

What do you charge to change a gay .270 Win to a manly 6.8-06? I heard that the 6.8mms are 5% more awesome than any 6.5mm could ever hope to be.

6MMWASP,

He might have meant .30-338, but didn't say it. My hearing isn't the best in the world, but I still have most of it, and he was less than two feet away. And if he did mean .30-338, his comment about how it doesn't kick much doesn't make all that much sense--unless, of course, he's one of those real he-men we often run into. Or maybe he loads it down to .30-308 velocity levels?

What this campfire needs is a "Tales from the Gunshop" forum. That way, whenever someone runs into one of these gems, we can type it up for posterity.

mudhen, do you mind telling me either here or on a pm the name of the gunshop???? I love those places.. We will be heading to New Mexico and Az. later this year.. Used gunshops are really awesome...

In 2007 I had a relatively rare turkey tag in Alberta. Now I had read a lot of turkey hunting how-to stories over the years, but when I'm at the LGS and not finding the 3" copper plated 5s I was looking for, I asked the very knowledgeable (about most firearms things and I knew he had accompanied a friend who was successful the previous year) clerk which he would choose, 4's or 5's (3" copper plated)?

He looked at me and said "Get the biggest you can?" I said 4's? "No the biggest you can". I said, What are you talking about? BB, 4 buck? "The biggest you can."


I'm now thinking he's pranking me. I say, Jim every article I've ever read advised that I should try to get a dense pattern and usually #4-6 copper plated shot is advised.

Old Jim got very mad. He said "How dare you ask for advice and then question me when I give it to you? Who's been in on a successful turkey hunt? Not you!"

You know, he has hardly said 5 words in a row to me since 2007 and goes out of his way to ignore me. But really who cares?

I bought the 6s BTW. If I do it again, I'll get 5s or 4s. Not impressed with the 6s unless my sample of one was a super turkey.

The premiere shop in our area going back to my teenager days in the early 1960s has long ago gone under, but many of us old goats remember it fondly. It eventually withered away after the old man turned it over to his sons, but by then chain stores had moved into our area and likely sealed its fate.

Great place, good stock of merchandise and mostly knowledgable staff that were primarily part timers, including several gun loonie local cops.

One guy in particular was very knowledgable, but his quirkiness turned an awful lot of people off. Not me. I always enjoyed leading him astray if the circumstances offered and never missed an opportunity.

When the M686 S&W came out, decided I had to have one and headed down with money in hand. Shop was busy that night, but I waited for him to free up, knowing he'd try to talk me into a Colt Python. After that failed, he laid a 4" and 6" Smiff out on the counter, then got a phone call. No one was ever allowed to leave a handgun on the counter with a customer, unattended, but there I was with my choice of pistols.

The other guys behind the counter picked up on that'un right away and when he came back, some got on him. He claimed it was okay because I was a regular and he knew me. So one of the cops that I knew well, said "Okay, then what's his name, if you know him?" ;O)

The owner had to come out to restore order among the employees.

Same quirky guy was the "entertainment" one night some years later at our monthly gun club meeting, to do a show'n tell on cleaning firearms.

He wanted examples of several kinds of rifles, shotguns and handguns. I fetched along my 444 Marlin, knowing he'd want to impress the crowd by demonstrating that they can be cleaned from the breech by removing the lever. So before the meeting I mentioned that I bet that lever screw on the Marlin was as tight as a boar's arse?

He spent minutes making sure he had exactly the correct screw driver bit from his gunsmith's tool kit, before attacking that lever screw. Older folks can picture Art Carney doing lots of flourishes getting ready to sign something, on the Honeymooners TV show.

He found out it was only finger tight, but by then I had faded back into the crowd and he couldn't find me right off.

He still works one night a week at another gun shop and is just as renowned for his quirkiness, as he was 30 years ago.

I once posted that I talked to a guy at my range (20 years ago) who had just finished building a "custom" 270-06. He necked a 30-06 case to 270 and called it a 270-06 wildcat with his name attached to the end. I asked why he just didn't chamber the rifle for the 270 Winchester (tongue-in-cheek question) and he started to tell me how his cartridge was better. I just said I had to get back to my bench and left.

A few years ago I picked up the last 700Ti at a Sportsmans in Idaho. The dude behind the counter (in a very authoritative semi-gruff persona) tried to tell me the Ti action very desirable because it was so much stronger than the standard 700 actions. After I got done laughing at him, I asked if he thought the weight reduction had any merit or if paying $1K was worth it just for all that additional action strength.

A different employee handled my paperwork.

I overheard a dumbass at a LGS one day telling a Dr. That I knew very well that bullet from a 30.06 could travel a distance of over 5 miles! The Doc & I just looked at each other & winked. GS clerk never did figure out we were laughing at him.

Heard this same dumbas GS clerk tell another customer that the WW .375 Big Bore Cartridge was only good for killing a hog out to only 70 yards.

The idocricy of some people never fails to amaze me.

Once stopped at a gunshop in my area to buy some ammunition and chatted with the owner for a couple of minutes. I asked him if he was going to go hunting as deer season was just a few days away and he responded with: No, I dont want to be in the woods with all the bleeps that come in here all day.

I've heard it from both sides of the counter, most recent was a customer at the LGS. Old fella,wanted a box of GOOD 30-06 ammo. It needed to hit HARD, he told the guy helping him. The poor guy brought out about everything they had, to no avail. The Partitions were no good because they were soft points, and he needed his bullets to hit HARD! The TTSX's were no good, that plastic tip wasan't going to hit hard either. Hollowpoints were right out. I left before he made a decision, but I felt kinda bad for the guy behind the counter, he was trying very hard to be patient, but it was a couple days before deer season and the line was getting longer by the minute.

Hey JB,

Two GFY's already this year. Trying to qualify for the Hi-Line Crowd? Don't disagree with your conclusions, and appreciate you telling it like it is! I just turned 64 and don't have much tolerance for idiots either. Glad to see you are showing your age.

Well, this is a fun thread.
I guess I avoid most of it because my hearing's shot and I already know what I want.
The other thing, and I have to consider myself lucky, we have around 3 LGS and 4 BGS, I think, and this is probably one of the gunniest counties in America.

According to TP&W, a .30-06 round can only travel up to 4.5 miles, he was way off

http://www.tpwd.state.tx.us/learning/hunter_education/homestudy/firearms/bullets.phtml

And that was his problem. Quoting some dumb ass pencil pushing bureaucrat from TP&W.

Here at the Ranch, part of our property has two cotton fields that are each 320 acres. They are separated by a county road. So each fence that keeps our cows out of our crops is roughly 1 mile long in each direction.

Little brother used to bet me he could shoot across both fields with the old man's 30.06 when we were kids. And since our closest neighbor is over 6 miles away, no one was in Iminent danger.
No matter how much elevation he held, he could never shoot across both fields.