Home Forums Hunting & Shooting Hunter's Campfire Would You Divorce Your Wife If She Forced You To Live In California?

The woman you are married to today may not be the woman you thought you married years ago!

This for sure. Look into buying another property in the state of your preference to use as a part time residence/base camp while maintaining your present addy/home.

I'd like to change my answer.

Instead of watching Fireproof, watch Gone Girl.

Proceed accordingly.



Travis

Two things come to mind.

Young and Naive.

Bait and Switch.

YMMV.

Could you imagine living with that nut job.

I think I did.

I was just a lot smarter than Ben Affleck. (which isn't saying much)



Travis

Neither of us is young or naïve. But in the case of bait and switch...see my first post on this subject.

I have a good hunting buddy and business partner who's wife decided the two of them were going to move to Washington DC so she could work for a very liberal lobbying group. She is now his ex-wife.

Salmonella: Sorry to hear of your dilemma.
I would not even consider living in kalifornicopia!
Divorce her.
Best of luck to you.
Hold into the wind
VarmintGuy

Would you say that if she is a Seahawks fan?

I understand all that.

My take on it is that Sal is very unhappy living there. Sounds as though his wife will not listen to his concerns and has made ZERO attempt at helping him resolve his problems.

That's what a couple does. Help one another. Even if one is having a problem that is more perception than reality, the other's responsibility is and should be to help. Not tune them out and say repeatedly that all is great. End of story.

My main point is that I would not leave my wife solely because of address. But if address were a problem for me and she refused to even listen to my concerns and help resolve the issue (doesn't mean we'd have to move but simply that she would listen and help me deal with the problem in some form or fashion), her unwillingness to work with me would result in my swift departure.

That is why I qualified things by saying, "sounds as though... And if so, I would...."

If I've read it wrong, then all bets are off on my approach.

Yes, and I've divorced for less...

Curious as to how well Sal has voiced his concerns, his plan for their employment in the move, etc. Moving on ones own "to start a new life" is a big as decision.

You only get one life.

Is she even willing to sit down and discuss it with you?

Women can be funny critters, in the best of times. When we moved from CA to AK 18 years ago, she was all for it. Not an easy move with a 2 1/2 y/o and a 7 month old and moving all of our meager possessions stuffed into two cars and two trailers with more than a few details to be worked out upon arrival.

Fast forward to last weekend, we moved less than 30 miles and she dragged her feet for the year and change it took to get a lot and have a house built on it. 3500 mile move, no problem, less than 30 miles, man was it tough! Now that she's in the new house, she absolutely loves it.

When you add a woman's emotional attachment to a place, it is going to be damn tough to get her to uproot and move. Especially if she doesn't see any good reason for the move.

With all that said and with Sal's matter at hand, something I came to realize about 8 years ago is that if I staked my happiness on who is in political power, I'd be sorely disappointed. You have to base what makes you happy, and making yourself happy squarely on your own shoulders, as that is all you have any control over. A big move to a place where people are "more reasonable" can often be a big disappointment.



Welcome to the United States in 2015, you simply can't avoid those types no matter where you live. Are there some bastions of people that mostly have common sense?, absolutely, well more or less. But any place that is populated with people, is going to have a percentage of jerks and fools.

Have I been glad for having made the move to Alaska from California? Absolutely, I can't imagine having raised my family any where else. Have I also been disappointed that the reality of living here fell short of the dream I had in my head before moving? Absolutely as well.

If you're married to a good woman (they are few and far between) the two of you will figure out a way to make it work. That may be in California, or it may be somewhere else. If you find yourself drowning and she won't let you come up to catch a breath, then you'll come to a realization that for whatever reason your relationship is no longer compatible and one or both parties are being sell fish and it's time to go separate ways.

As others keep saying, you need to sit down and start discussing the situation. If she is unwilling to listen to you or engage in the conversation, well that's telling.

You have so many days on this pile of dirt. How do you want to spend them? 16 years old and answers about girls etc. Over 40 and you better be concerned about what things look like under your feet.

Ten years pounding around? 5? 15? Better be someplace good or your tits up and looking for answers..
W

Looking back on almost thirty years of marriage (which is a lot for a cop), I can honestly say that the biggest mistakes I ever made were when I let my wife talk (force) me out of doing something. Land investments, job changes and moves come to mind.

The worst part is that, in almost every case, she came back and said I should have just done it.

I'll use part of a quote from some poster here couple days back....slightly revised:

"I'd rather sit down and whittle me out a bill and pick schitt with the chickens than live where there's millions of AHs!"