Home Forums Hunting & Shooting Hunter's Campfire Quotes by cops

“Here’s your quarter that you paid of my salary.”

“Take your hands off the car, and I’ll make your birth certificate a worthless document.”

“That says POLICE, not taxi.”

“You want a warning? OK, here’s your warning: If you speed again I’ll write you another ticket.”

“Life’s tough. It’s tougher if you’re stupid.”

“We don’t hire cops in this department; we hire common sense and make cops from it.”

“I’m glad to hear the chief of police is a good, personal friend of yours. At least you know someone who can post your bail.”

“Can I see your pilots license, cause you were flying down the road?”

"No, pretty women do not get tickets from me. Sign here and send the fine to...."

"Here, let me loan you my flashlight so you can see to pull your head out of that dark, stinking place that it is currently in."

"I know you pay my salary. Here is your opportunity to help pay the Judge's salary, too."

Ed

"What'd you do wrong? 73 in a 70. License and registration, please".

and they can get away with that sort of trash talk, because they have the POWER.

Sam, I have never talked like that to anyone that didn't start the exchange by being a complete asshat and continuing until my patience was gone.

I am a patient person, but everyone has their limits and we are all human. It has nothing to do with "the POWER" and I got in hot water for both of those.

Ed

"It's a lie! The evidence has been falsified! It's impossible! I never broke the law, I AM THE LAW!"

Two kinds of cops. The ones that truly want to help then there's the ones who got stuffed into gym lockers in high school. Fortunately the good far outweigh the bad.

Yep, we're all human...and it pisses working tax payers off to be stopped for some bull$hit traffic violation or expired tags by a government tax collector with a badge and a gun...all the while real crimes are taking place rampantly throughout the community.

BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM.............................................FREEEEEZZE!!!!!

I've had numerous positive interactions, but here's three I had going back about the mid 90's

They may not be news worthy, but at the time it sure left a bad taste in my mouth.

After my car had been heavily burglarized in my driveway and i requested fingerprints be taken from my interior and exterior where they clearly gained entry (prints CLEARLY visible)
"prints? Uh huh. This isnt the movies. Did you have an alarm?"


I parked in a legal spot behind a double parked police car. Officer was in the post office, and left ahead of me. While in the post office, the meter ran out. Officer was giving me a ticket when i came outside. I explained that the line was longer than I anticipated, and that he was in there too. Can I have a break on this? He said plan ahead and put in more money in the meter. I noted that he was in fact double parked, which is not legal either. and the quote...
"I dont have to follow parking laws, I enforce them".


I am certain I've said some stupid crap at work too.

So cops should stop enforcing traffic laws?

Do you have any idea how many crimes (not traffic infractions) that are solved through traffic stops? How many wanted felons are taken off the streets because they violated some "bullshit traffic violation"?

Your view is quite narrow and shows your ignorance about police work. I highly recommend that you contact your local LE agencies and ask about a "ride along". If your local agencies have a "Citizens Academy", I would also highly recommend that you attend it.

Ed

Yep, lots of warrant arrests come out of traffic stops, drug busts too.

"Press hard, five copies" "Have a nice day" always brought a smile to my face, but then I wrote few actual citations, lots of warnings though.

If you stop someone for a bull$hit traffic violation and a real 'crime' (not a traffic infraction) is solved through that traffic stop...then that's great.
But if not, then why don't you just let the guy go without a ticket...?
If a wanted felon is taken off the streets because they violated some bull$hit traffic violation...then that's great.
But if not, then why don't you just let the guy go without a ticket...?

The most popular for sure.

"Extra bacon...well then extra EXTRA bacon"

fixt.

Most of em here do let em go.....

I"m about tired of the incesant pounding the LEO gets here.

In ANYTHING< and thats LEO included, there are likely 10% that are no good. 10% that are above average, and the other 80 percent does their job and are humans and do a good job at it.

I"m tired of bashing 90 because of 10...

Really, anyone with a brass shield on their front windshield or a PBA card from a family member will not be getting a ticket unless they are drunk and T bone someone (actually may even not then, as I've observed). The people without PBA cards should have known someone with a PBA card, right?

I doubt that's how it works everywhere, but it is most certainly the way it works here. Its messed up that some people do and others dont get tickets for the exact same offense (say, 6 miles over the limit on a freeway, rolling through a stop sign in a deserted area... etc)

"After my car had been heavily burglarized in my driveway and i requested fingerprints be taken from my interior and exterior where they clearly gained entry (prints CLEARLY visible)
prints? Uh huh. This isnt the movies. Did you have an alarm?"

Had that exact conversation in almost the same circumstances.

The break in happened at a meeting place and a friend called the cops without my knowledge. The thief had taken my Ruger Security Six from behind the seat of my pickup, but left my Girlfriend's 30-30 in the cab.

Alarms weren't common then, but I got a lecture on carrying firearms in my pickup.

I did get the satisfaction of telling the jake-legged son of a bitch that I wasn't the one who sent for him and he go back home and get back to watching Ironsides.