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Subject: SNOW DAY IN CALIFORNIA





What a morning…


8:00 AM I made a snowman.





8:10 A feminist passed by and asked me why I didn’t make a snow woman.





8:15 So, I made a snow woman.





8:17 The nanny of the neighbors complained about the snow woman's voluptuous chest.





8:20 The gay couple living nearby grumbled that it should have been two snowmen instead.





8:25 The vegans at #12 complained about the nose. Carrots are for food, not for decorating snow figures.





8:28 I am being called a racist because the snow couple is white.





8:31 The Muslim guy across the road wants the snow woman to wear a headscarf.





8:40 Someone calls the cops. They show up to see what’s going on.





8:42 I’m told that the snowman’s broomstick has to be removed because it could be used as a deadly weapon.





8:47 Things get worse after I mutter, "Yeah, if it's up your ass."





8:52 My phone and broomstick are then seized and I'm taken away in a police car.





8:53 My neighbors are cheering.





9:00 I'm on the news as a suspected terrorist bent on stirring up trouble during this difficult weather.





9:10 I am asked if I have any accomplices.





9:29 A little known jihadist group has claimed it was their plot.





Moral of the story: When it's this cold, stay inside and remember when America was great.

"Moral of the story: When it's this cold, stay inside and remember when America was great."

Before the Communists took over.

Ed